Lonely hearts adverts,........,first drafts!)

Gary O'

Well-known Member
Location
Oregon
"A good hearted gentleman is seeking a similar female,
Known for humour, poems and rhymes,
You can be certain life would not be dull or pale,
for the lady taking his fancy for happy times,
ever more contented, secure, you cannot fail,
thankful you are cherished by one jolly, big male"!

(hit or miss again?)
Not words I'd use, but rather catchy

I'd shorten it a bit

To something like;

'GIT IN THE CAR!'
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
OK
Roses are red
Git in the bed
Sorry graham... been awhile
You could get inspiration, or pinch ideas from Doris Day and Dean Martin perhaps(?).

"How do you like your eggs in the morning"
"I like mine with a kiss"!

add something about a cuppa, for suppa, after spending all day in bed, " before you get wed"!
(and there you are, plus saves money on roses. :)
 

MrPants

Member
Location
Iqaluit
Quote:

"A wife wanted, must understand washing, ironing, baking bread, making coffee, roasting beef, veal, fowl, broiling a fish, making tarts, plum puddings, and desserts of all kinds" (Chester Chronicle August 30th 1816
I'd go with this one (y)
Let us know (word for word) what the responses are ;)
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
I'd go with this one (y)
Let us know (word for word) what the responses are ;)
As my daughter used to say when I tried to instil high ambitions in her mind at eight or ten years old, (like being an airline pilot),
"Why don't you do it"?
(that way you'll be sure you have every response coming forward, as I might make them up yu knows!)
 
Ok, Grahamg. I'm going to pretend I'm a lady. That line, "One not afraid to get her hands dirty" has all the appeal of "slopping the hogs" does. And I'm dense, I honestly don't know what you mean the next 4 lines.. And both "fun and serious responses welcome"? you mean "any"? How about describing you first, including your emotional needs, then something about your austere life style. You don't need to be putting road blocks all over your ad., it's her job to agree or not. It's who you are, how you live, and let her decide.
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
Ok, Grahamg. I'm going to pretend I'm a lady. That line, "One not afraid to get her hands dirty" has all the appeal of "slopping the hogs" does. And I'm dense, I honestly don't know what you mean the next 4 lines.. And both "fun and serious responses welcome"? you mean "any"? How about describing you first, including your emotional needs, then something about your austere life style. You don't need to be putting road blocks all over your ad., it's her job to agree or not. It's who you are, how you live, and let her decide.
Look, if there is one person/woman in the world of nine billion folks out there for each one of us you've got to be prepared to do a little sifting haven't you, (simple logic in my view?)?
Hence "road blocks" are wholly intentional, especially when you're at a time in your life you wont be too upset of bothered if no fine lady manages to see the treasure in my heart and mind.
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
Before you throw a fish back into the lake, you need to catch it first.
Maybe your analogy isn't 100% applicable to these circumstances(?).
How many fish volunteer to get caught, and if not caught of their free will, what good would be the wife/partner so obtained?
However, "jazzing up" my lonely hearts ad to make it more appealing, is always worth considering.
 

hellomimi

Namaste 🙏
Location
City of Angels
Susan is not looking for a stable relationship, just a great looking escort to functions she attends. If some men seek trophy girlfriends to show off, this is the male version. No issue for people seeking the same thing to enjoy the moment.

I'd love to see a fuchsia garden. If only I had a green thumb! Sigh.
 

OneEyedDiva

Well-known Member
Location
New Jersey
They don't call me Diva and Queen for nothing. No dirty hands, no catching and cooking chickens. Add I'll hire a cook and maid...and that would be a more attractive ad to me. :D Not looking to date ever again though....so wouldn't be likely to even see a "lonely hearts" ad.
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
Susan is not looking for a stable relationship, just a great looking escort to functions she attends. If some men seek trophy girlfriends to show off, this is the male version. No issue for people seeking the same thing to enjoy the moment.
I'd love to see a fuchsia garden. If only I had a green thumb! Sigh.
"See no evil/naughtiness"? :)
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
They don't call me Diva and Queen for nothing. No dirty hands, no catching and cooking chickens. Add I'll hire a cook and maid...and that would be a more attractive ad to me. :D Not looking to date ever again though....so wouldn't be likely to even see a "lonely hearts" ad.
Would you be interested in "glamping", (posh camping I believe?)?

Glamping.1.jpeg

Glamping.2.jpg
 
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OneEyedDiva

Well-known Member
Location
New Jersey
Would you be interested in "glamping", (posh camping I believe?)?

View attachment 151551

View attachment 151552
A few years ago, there was a plan for me to go camping with my Honorary Daughter (son's ex) and her children (my grandchildren) But we were going to stay in cabins which is what I imagine you're talking about. That is the only way I'd consider that experience.
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
"Reputed to be an as from a glossy magazine"

Professor of aeronautics seeks female copilot,
to ascend the heights in life and maybe the air,
at ease enjoying good company at a cocktail party,
keeping fit, looking fifty, though just over that mark,
said to be handsome and generous too,
father to two fine grown sons,
likes to care for others and about what matters in life.

:)
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
I have not gotten much response with this one but you are welcome to try it for yourself.
Wanted: Woman with truck,
please send picture of truck.
Humour of any kind is a plus I feel, "lighten the mood" etc., whether seeking a date, or disarming those who might not be inclined to like you in other spheres of your life.

The "lonely hearts ad " just above your post was another spoof one I dreamt up, or to be precise an as describing someone I know who seems to attract female company without much difficulty, (I'd describe him as a pretty good guy too!).

Its probably more to do with folks getting bored with the thread, but if describing him, or "selling him" creates no reaction here, I guess I'm up against a pretty though audience. :)
 

grahamg

Well-known Member
"When I was a boy father bought home a collie no one wanted, my sisters didn't take to this shy little blackish dog, nor my brother,
so I was the only one kindly welcoming Jessie to the farm, she never learnt to help drove the cattle as the other dogs, too timid,
all she could do well was play ball, and try to climb a ladder too, she couldn't sell herself you could say, but what the dog had was a heart and loyalty in spades, she never forgot my kindness, and no matter how brother tried, Jess always came to me when shouted, not him".

I cannot sell myself well either, I'm not a handsome dashing pilot, but to someone looking for a good heart and loyalty, I might just do! :)
 
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Murrmurr

Senior Member
"When I was a boy father bought home a collie no one wanted, my sisters didn't take to this shy little blackish dog, nor my brother,
so I was the only one kindly welcoming Jessie to the farm,
she never learnt to help drove the cattle as the other dogs, too timid,
all she could do well was play ball, and try to climb a ladder too, she couldn't sell herself you could say, but what the dog had was a heart and loyalty in spades, she never forgot my kindness, and no matter how brother tried, Jess always came to me when shouted, not him".
I cannot sell myself well either, I'm not a handsome dashing pilot, but to someone looking for a good heart and loyalty, I might just do! :)
There's your ad.
 

Murrmurr

Senior Member
"You're with me then", (in other words go for the sympathy vote! :giggle: ).
I'm saying that this >
"When I was a boy father bought home a collie no one wanted, my sisters didn't take to this shy little blackish dog, nor my brother,
so I was the only one kindly welcoming Jessie to the farm, she never learnt to help drove the cattle as the other dogs, too timid,
all she could do well was play ball, and try to climb a ladder too, she couldn't sell herself you could say, but what the dog had was a heart and loyalty in spades, she never forgot my kindness, and no matter how brother tried, Jess always came to me when shouted, not him".

I cannot sell myself well either, I'm not a handsome dashing pilot, but to someone looking for a good heart and loyalty, I might just do! :)
says more about who you are (in a positive light) than anything you've fiddled with so far.
 


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