Malapropisms

I was watching an episode of "Cops" a few years back. A cop was questioning a guy who hit his girlfriend. The guy was trying to justify hitting her & the cop said, "Your point is mute." He realized what he said & he then said, "Your point is moot."
A Chinese gal I was dating had some trouble pronouncing some words & sometimes they came out funny. She had a 10 year old son who wanted a Guinea Pig. She told me "My son wants to get a Kitty Pig."
 
My Dad was from Germany and would get idioms wrong. My Mom got annoyed with him whenever he said, "I don't know him from Adam to Eve." or "I'm not just banging around in the bushes." (beating around the bush)
Boy, what I could do with than 2nd one........ :ROFLMAO:
 
"Crocodile Tears" means a insincere display of emotion. But I thought big tears from a Crocodile must mean big deep sadness...so when someone died I told the mourners in a forum that I had been crying Crocodile tears all day about it. Someone finally corrected me...yikes
 
I don't know if the wonderful Gilda Radner character, Emily Litella, was engaging in malapropism, exactly, with her constant misunderstandings of words. In any case, she was hilarious I still miss her. Here's the one about "violins on television."

 
When my daughter Alex was a child, she had a gift for malaprops:
"There are bees in the back yarden!"
"I bumped my forthhead."
"Why does mommy put makeup on her eye flashes?"

For those who remember early radio programs, "Easy Aces" featured Goodman and Jane Ace as a comedy team. And Jane was a master of malaprops. "He was a ragged individualist." (rugged individualist) and many more.

Be well!
Tom
 
When my daughter Alex was a child, she had a gift for malaprops:
"There are bees in the back yarden!"
"I bumped my forthhead."
"Why does mommy put makeup on her eye flashes?"

For those who remember early radio programs, "Easy Aces" featured Goodman and Jane Ace as a comedy team. And Jane was a master of malaprops. "He was a ragged individualist." (rugged individualist) and many more.

Be well!
Tom
In case I missed ur introduction on another thread, welcome to the forum @TommyTomTom !
 
A long time ago a friend, who answered the telephone
for a local taxi company lost her job, I didn't know this
at the time, but when she walked into the bar where we
all met, I asked her, "what happened to Len's Taxis"?
She replied "he got liquidised"!

Mike.
 
When oldest daughter was in high school, she had an assignment to make a drawing of a tool. She did a pretty good version of this:

F6489242-1C83-4AD7-9963-BF50359FFC6F.jpeg
When she got the paper back, it turned out she had titled it a “5/8 inch wench”. The teacher wrote next to this, “I don’t think so!”
 
The new finance director had made a thorough costive search of the company's finances and was confident there were no irregularities.

That sentence was part of an exam question. It asked what was wrong. It is a malapropism of sorts, the reason being, costive has nothing to do with finance, it means constipated. But my answer "he probably cooked the books," was immediately picked up by the lecturer who remarked: "For once, I actually appreciate your humour."
 

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