Most irritating attitudes towards seniors?

[Denise1952]

Some of the most refreshing moments are when young people, usually teens or twenty-somethings, relate to me on equal terms.

Ditto on this, I got to be in some classes with much younger people and I was one of the gang, or it always felt that way I mean I didn't get invited to out-of-class things but that's ok, I would not have wanted to go unless there where other's my age

 

[Justme]

It's like hearing someone talk baby-talk to a child, I don't mean an infant, but I love to hear parents talk normal to kids. I think it should be the same with all people. I am careful who I disrespect if they are grouchy etc. I've found some of those folks to be the most wonderful people. It's just they have a lot of pain, maybe physical, maybe other. I know that some folks (any age) will be miserable in their attitude, I get there on occasion, and I think the objective is to make others feel as miserable.

I think my mother, who in her opinion was always right, mission in life was to get others on the wrong side of her! Her mother, my favourite Grandmother, was not touchy feely, and spoke her mind, but I got on so well with her so did others.

 

[Denise1952]

I think my mother, who in her opinion was always right, mission in life was to get others on the wrong side of her! Her mother, my favourite Grandmother, was not touchy feely, and spoke her mind, but I got on so well with her so did others.

I think some folks like to do that, it's fun for them. I only think it's sad when they are deeply lonely, want relationships. I mean, for me, I don't try to alienate people, I do sometimes. There are a couple of people in this world that know I am full of hot air sometimes, trying to be tough. They've just known me too long for me to be able to fool them

 

[Bee]

One thing that annoys me is being called "Young man". Like (for example) a store clerk saying, "How may I help you,

young man?"

WTF ? I'm OLD, I look OLD, I KNOW I'm old, and the clerk thinks he/she is trying to cheer me up by calling me YOUNG !

Well, I've got news for them....It has the opposite effect.

Crikey I lap it up when someone calls me a young woman, it doesn't bother me at all, in fact I end up laughing and joking with the person.:grin:

I never feel patronised by it.

 

[That Guy]

Often, we veterans can spot each other a mile away. There's a great guy I've become friendly with in passing after seeing him at the grocery store a few times a week. He always calls me "Young Man" and I challenged him once on that. Discovered that he's much older them I am so he gets the respect due my senior.

 

[Gael]

It’s definitely a western thing. In the East the opposite is the case and age is treated with respect. It’s the same in Africa, village elders and all that. Students and young people in Asia often nod their head in a token bow to the elderly when they pass them by, or even those of middle age. Group attacks against the elderly, or attacks on teachers is absolutely taboo.

That always strikes me and do wish westerners would have more of that outlook.

 

[Gael]

Some of the most refreshing moments are when young people, usually teens or twenty-somethings, relate to me on equal terms.

It's rare, but it happens and I treasure it.

 

[Gael]

Crikey I lap it up when someone calls me a young woman, it doesn't bother me at all, in fact I end up laughing and joking with the person.:grin:

I never feel patronised by it.

That's great because the majority of times is occurs, they're patronizing an older person. It's basically sarcasm. You're not young but they're playing a game and saying you are. Sort of like a very ugly girl being shouted at.."hey beautiful" by some wiseguys.

 

[Bee]

Sorry Gael but I have never looked at it as sarcasm or being patronised and anyone that does in my opinion must have some sort of problem.

It might help if older people stopped looking for problems where there aren't any.

 

[Gael]

Sorry Gael but I have never looked at it as sarcasm or being patronised and anyone that does in my opinion must have some sort of problem.

Several here have so I'm not alone in this, but if you take it as you do then it's better for you I would say. And you may have encountered the minority who do this and are genuinely not being sarcastic or patronizing.

 

[Bee]

No Gael the majority say it for a bit of fun, is it so hard to have a laugh and joke as we age and not look upon things as being patronising or sarcastic.

 

[Gael]

No Gael the majority say it for a bit of fun, is it so hard to have a laugh and joke as we age and not look upon things as being patronising or sarcastic.

Several disagree about that including myself, obviously. We will agree to disagree Bee.

 

[LogicsHere]

I agree with what you said in your paragraphs 2 and 3. And is especially bothers me when I see some little snot post that someone should be dead by the time they're 80. I particularly resent their attitude when many have starting salaries of $70,000 to $100,000 a year and I started at $45 a week. They also don't feel any responsibility to caring for a sick parent either . . . and curse us out when "their" (the younger generations) "entitled" inheritance has to go for the care of a parent in a nursing home.

 

[LogicsHere]

Shame on some of you. I wonder how well you would have turned out if your parents felt the same way about raising you as a child. I feel that you "owe" a parent something, perhaps not having to live with them I agree, as it can be difficult though I've been doing it for the last 3+ years and holding down a full-time job. But many resent the fact that the parent is spending "their" inheritance on nursing home care. You can't have it both ways.

 

[LogicsHere]

While I did not have the opportunity to have children which I sometimes regret, I also am happy knowing that I will not be a burden to them. I will pay my own way and if the money runs out, well then I guess I become the taxpayer's responsibility.

 

[Warrigal]

Shame on some of you. I wonder how well you would have turned out if your parents felt the same way about raising you as a child. I feel that you "owe" a parent something, perhaps not having to live with them I agree, as it can be difficult though I've been doing it for the last 3+ years and holding down a full-time job. But many resent the fact that the parent is spending "their" inheritance on nursing home care. You can't have it both ways.

In our family we are bound to each other by strong familial ties and by tradition.

Parents give their children as good an education and they can manage, some of it within the home and some at school etc. The children are then expected to make their own way into the world but the parents remain their supporters and helpers, sometimes with money, sometimes by lending a helping hand with the children or with homemaking.

Later, the parents take a step back and just fill the role of grandparent. Eventually, the early roles are reversed. The children help and support their parents, managing the parents' money for their benefit. If it has to be spent on their care, then it will be. If any cash or real estate is left when the last parent dies it passes to the children. Maybe it is a small sum, maybe there is bugger all. The children have already had the benefit of their parents' resources early in life. They should expect no more than this.

This is how it was with my parents and my sister and I. It is how it will be when I am in my dotage. It's not about debt. It's more about needs shifting over time and a sharing of resources to meet those needs.

 

[rkunsaw]

After reading so many of these posts on this subject I'll repeat what I've said:

Too many people are just too damn sensitive. I think some of you are looking for a reason to get upset about every little thing. I never have a problem with people of any age being rude to me because I'm not rude to them. You get the respect you deserve and some of you don't seem to deserve any.

Okay, go ahead and call me whatever you want, I'm not the sensitive type.

 

[Gael]

Shame on some of you. I wonder how well you would have turned out if your parents felt the same way about raising you as a child. I feel that you "owe" a parent something, perhaps not having to live with them I agree, as it can be difficult though I've been doing it for the last 3+ years and holding down a full-time job. But many resent the fact that the parent is spending "their" inheritance on nursing home care. You can't have it both ways.

“To care for those who once cared for us is one of the highest honors.”
― Tia Walker, The Inspired Caregiver: Finding Joy While Caring for Those You Love

 

[Gael]

In our family we are bound to each other by strong familial ties and by tradition.

Parents give their children as good an education and they can manage, some of it within the home and some at school etc. The children are then expected to make their own way into the world but the parents remain their supporters and helpers, sometimes with money, sometimes by lending a helping hand with the children or with homemaking.

Later, the parents take a step back and just fill the role of grandparent. Eventually, the early roles are reversed. The children help and support their parents, managing the parents' money for their benefit. If it has to be spent on their care, then it will be. If any cash or real estate is left when the last parent dies it passes to the children. Maybe it is a small sum, maybe there is bugger all. The children have already had the benefit of their parents' resources early in life. They should expect no more than this.

This is how it was with my parents and my sister and I. It is how it will be when I am in my dotage. It's not about debt. It's more about needs shifting over time and a sharing of resources to meet those needs.

Hear, hear!:clap:

 

[Gael]

After reading so many of these posts on this subject I'll repeat what I've said:

Too many people are just too damn sensitive. I think some of you are looking for a reason to get upset about every little thing. I never have a problem with people of any age being rude to me because I'm not rude to them. You get the respect you deserve and some of you don't seem to deserve any.

Okay, go ahead and call me whatever you want, I'm not the sensitive type.

I wouldn't call you anything, you're entitled to your take on things as is everyone.

 

[Denise1952]

“To care for those who once cared for us is one of the highest honors.”
― Tia Walker, The Inspired Caregiver: Finding Joy While Caring for Those You Love

I had mentioned earlier about my relationship with mom I think, she was a heavy drinker, almost up to the day she died. But still, I so wish my family would have been the kind of family that we all watch out for each other. I truly believe it is meant to be that way. I know people have their own ideas about it and good reason I'm sure. Oh heck, I wish a lot of things about life were different but it is what it is I guess. Denise

 

[Gael]

I had mentioned earlier about my relationship with mom I think, she was a heavy drinker, almost up to the day she died. But still, I so wish my family would have been the kind of family that we all watch out for each other. I truly believe it is meant to be that way. I know people have their own ideas about it and good reason I'm sure. Oh heck, I wish a lot of things about life were different but it is what it is I guess. Denise

I know,:chargrined: the ideal is often the furthest from the reality. It also doesn't help either that we grew up with shows like The Brady Bunch, Father Knows Best, etc., ,etc.

 

[Gael]

Why should people be treated differently because they are old, I don't get it? Obviously if they have special needs then they should be addressed, just as you would with anyone else. However old age alone doesn't demand respect imo. Respect has to be earned whatever the age, and some old people definitely don't qualify because of their attitude.

I agree about respect and earning it. I think though, to have a snide attitude towards someone just because of their age, appearance, race, economic status, etc., etc. is out of order.

 

[Denise1952]

I know,:chargrined: the ideal is often the furthest from the reality. It also doesn't help either that we grew up with shows like The Brady Bunch, Father Knows Best, etc., ,etc.

Yes, kids don't get why their home isn't like that, When you grow up you see it is the "ideal" but rarely reality.

 

[Gael]

Yes, kids don't get why their home isn't like that, When you grow up you see it is the "ideal" but rarely reality.

It's like the whole brainwashing of the media that we are affected by. Nowadays it's young girls especially emulating impossibly thin runway models and developing eating disorders, for example.