Most of our generation of 50+were HOME SCHOOLED in many ways

Ken N Tx

Ken N Tx

MALE
Location
Texas
1.My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2.My mother taught me RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3.My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next
week!"

4.My father taught me LOGIC.

" Because I said so, that's why ."

5.My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .

"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6.My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7.My father taught me IRONY.

"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8.My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9.My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10.My mother taught me about STAMINA.

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11.My mother taught me about WEATHER.

"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12.My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

"If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

13.My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."

14.My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .

"Stop acting like your father!"

15.My mother taught me about ENVY.

"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have
wonderful parents like you do."

16.My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.

"Just wait until we get home."

17.My mother taught me about RECEIVING.

"You are going to get it from your father when you get home!"

18 .My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that
way."

19.My mother taught me ESP.

"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20.My father taught me HUMOR.

"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21.My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22.My mother taught me GENETICS.

"You're just like your father."

23.My mother taught me about my ROOTS.

"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24.My mother taught me WISDOM.

"When you get to be my age, you'll understand.

25.My father taught me about JUSTICE .

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
 

One of my father's favourite expressions was, "I would sooner see you up in the churchyard than turn out bad", and he meant it.
 
After tearing a hole in yet another pair of jeans my mom would say, "you need to take better care of your clothes, do you think money grows on trees ?"

Gawd, she must have thought I was pretty darn stupid......I knew it came from her purse.
 
My father did everything he could to make a boy out of me. He hated when I fixed up or wore perfume. He usually only said things once because I had comebacks.
He said " Get some of that perfume off. You smell like a French whorehouse!"
To which I shot right back " Been in a lot of 'em eh Dad?"
 
My favorite Dad used was " I'm fixing to be all over you like a rooster on a June bug!"
No come backs after that one. He said that when I was in trouble. :p
 
BlunderWoman said:
My favorite Dad used was " I'm fixing to be all over you like a rooster on a June bug!"
No come backs after that one. He said that when I was in trouble. :p
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What a perfect Southernism, 'fixing' used in place of about. We use the term all the time in Tennessee. I cringe sometimes when I realize I've said, 'I'm fixing to go ---- fill in blank.
 
It was a real wake-up when I opened my mouth and my mother's voice came out. I'd find myself saying the identical things my mother said and that I SWORE I'd never say to my kids.

My mom's favorite comeback when one of us wailed, "That's not fair! You're mean!" was "I'm your mother. It's not an elected position. I'm not running for Miss Congeniality." Darned if I didn't say the same thing to my daughter.
 
jujube said:
It was a real wake-up when I opened my mouth and my mother's voice came out. I'd find myself saying the identical things my mother said and that I SWORE I'd never say to my kids.

My mom's favorite comeback when one of us wailed, "That's not fair! You're mean!" was "I'm your mother. It's not an elected position. I'm not running for Miss Congeniality." Darned if I didn't say the same thing to my daughter.
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That's a funny one View attachment 27711
 
Gail.S said:
What a perfect Southernism, 'fixing' used in place of about. We use the term all the time in Tennessee. I cringe sometimes when I realize I've said, 'I'm fixing to go ---- fill in blank.
Click to expand...

Our daughter picked up "fixing" at Florida State Univ about 34 years ago, we still say it all the time.

When we lived in Jacksonville we picked up the expression "hit him upside the head".
 
Ken, I think I heard every one of those things from my mother -- except it was oatmeal instead of spinach. "You're going to sit there all day until you eat that oatmeal." My only hope was that the dog would come along . . . .

Also, since it wasn't long after the War, I heard a lot about the starving children in Japan --""How can you turn up your nose at that oatmeal when there are children starving in Japan?" I never did figure out how my eating my oatmeal would help the children starving in Japan. Oatmeal was (and still is) gross.
 
My Mom use to say, finish your dinner, you should be glad you have something to eat. Think of all those poor people in Europe. I don't know why she chose Europe. I use to say under my breath, send it to them!
 
Ruth n Jersey said:
My Mom use to say, finish your dinner, you should be glad you have something to eat. Think of all those poor people in Europe. I don't know why she chose Europe. I use to say under my breath, send it to them!
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We were discussing once which nationality of starving children we got thrown at us regularly and I found that with the Protestants of my age group, it was usually the starving children in Africa. The Catholics of my group got the starving Chinese babies. I asked my father who his starving children were and he said it was the starving Armenians.

I have no idea to this day why if it was so darned important that we consider the plight of the "starving children" that my usual offer of boxing up my carrots/Brussels sprouts/liver and sending them to the little whiners was never accepted. Hmmmph.
 
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