Moving to an independent living community

C

Candi1

Member
A couple of years ago, I looked into moving to a senior independent living complex in upstate New York. The apartments looked lovely exxcept that the studios looked too much like nursing home rooms, but the photos of the residents depressed me terribly.
Even though I am a senior citizen, I don't feel old, still work, albeit part-time, I still get out regularly and am involved in my community. i am constantly seeking to learn new things, at the job and online. I have an upending thirst for knowledge. The pictures of the residents at the retirement complex all looked tired out, bored and just waiting to die. The highlight of their day, besides talking about grandkids, gardening and family, seemed to be lining up for the communal meals served each evening.
Does anyone else feel the same about independent living communities? I know it's nice to have company around to socialize with but I prefer associating with people of various ages and professions rather than with people who just seem to have given up on life and new experiences.
 

It will sound impossible to some, but I plan to go forward with the thoughts and drive of a 16 year old. God will take me when God will take me. Plenty exit at a young age.

So today I will choose vigor.

I wouldn't fit in with retirement communities.
 
I don't know how you feel about apartment or condo complexes or mobile home parks, but there are some that rather than being specified for 55 & older for instance, say they're for working and retired adults only. There's a mobile home park in my town, last I heard that was for working & retired adults only and that seems to make for a more vibrant community, some people still working, traveling, interested in things in addition to grandkids and the "good" old days. A community that says 18 and older might be the same way. Good luck to you. (Wish I could move from where I live.)
 

I live in a rent-stabilized apartment in NYC and although my rent isn't that cheap ($1350), I can rest assured that I know what said rent will be for the next two years and that the landlord can raise it by only a certain percentage when my current lease expires. I looked into co-ops/condos but the monthly maintenance costs and special assessment can increase substantially at any time and with no control over the amounts. With what I would pay for a co-op/condo, I can put that money into paying my rent for the next 10 - 20 years. As for mobile home parks, I have read that they're being bought up by large corporations that are raising rents out of sight.
 
I think you're being really smart to stay in Queens, NY @Candi1. I feel a bit stuck here myself, I prefer small towns, but I was left my family co-op where I grew up and financially, it is the best for me. In my case, my son/grandson live NYC so how could I ever leave them? Besides, I don't have a car, not for 20 years, so a small town in a nice state, for me, New England, would be too inconvenient.
 
Independent living facilities differ and none may work for all individuals. While there is the camaraderie and shared experience of living with those of similar age, interests will vary. A top notch independent living facility will have an activities coordinator or similar facility agency that plans day trips throughout the month to areas of interest or need as well as group exercises and games. They may even work with local organizations for performances, speaking engagements and perhaps even pet visits.

As an independent living facility client, you are only tied to the facility by communal rules. You could still use your vehicle or municipal transportation as you wish. It is independent living after all.

The independent living facility I have in mind for myself as a backup if needed, caters to military veterans. The cost of living in the facility would be one third of my income. I currently own my own home and am happy with that arrangement for now.
 
Have you seen the TV show "Waiting for God"?? An older British show about a retirement community and a couple of residents bucking the system. Very good, just for fun.

Anyway, no, I have not had the experience that you mentioned. We left our kids behind and moved north where we positioned ourselves to be near a good retirement community with independent living. Both sets of our parents had moved into such housing and LOVED it. My father & stepmother lived in an Erickson Community where you have to be 62-1/2 to move in - a number of couples were still working and there are tons of things to do. It isn't prison. If it feels like that to you - shop around.

We started out here, in a house in a small town. Since we have no family here and DH has Parkinsons, it was always our plan to ultimately end up in such a retirement community. We have traveled the area and toured at least a half dozen, putting our names on 2 wait lists. At one or two places we came away shaking our heads that this particular set up was not for us. It was worth the effort to shop around! We have now activated our names on the community that is closest to where we now live and we are really looking forward to the move. It has taken 3+ years and now we wait for unit to become available. Can't wait!
 
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Pepper said:
I think you're being really smart to stay in Queens, NY @Candi1. I feel a bit stuck here myself, I prefer small towns, but I was left my family co-op where I grew up and financially, it is the best for me. In my case, my son/grandson live NYC so how could I ever leave them? Besides, I don't have a car, not for 20 years, so a small town in a nice state, for me, New England, would be too inconvenient.
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I also researched small cities/towns in New England before deciding to stay where I am. The New England towns looked beautifully tempting but, again, as you mentioned, would require a car to get around.
 
Myquest55 said:
We started out here, in a house in a small town. Since we have no family here and DH has Parkinsons, it was always our plan to ultimately end up in such a place. We have traveled the area and toured at least a half dozen, putting our names on 2 wait lists. At one or two places we came away shaking our heads that this particular set up was not for us. It was worth the effort to shop around! We have now activated our names on the community that is closest to where we now live and we are really looking forward to the move. It has taken 3+ years and now we wait for unit to become available. Can't wait!
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We’re in a similar position as you. DH has PD too and we try to be receptive to new ideas. Even living in a small house, there are so many chores that are no longer easy. So far, we haven’t seen the right place.
 
Myquest55 said:
Have you seen the TV show "Waiting for God"?? An older British show about a retirement community and a couple of residents bucking the system. Very good, just for fun.

Anyway, no, I have not had the experience that you mentioned. We left our kids behind and moved north where we positioned ourselves to be near a good retirement community with independent living. Both sets of our parents had moved into such housing and LOVED it. My father & stepmother lived in an Erickson Community where you have to be 62-1/2 to move in - a number of couples were still working and there are tons of things to do. It isn't prison. If it feels like that to you - shop around.

We started out here, in a house in a small town. Since we have no family here and DH has Parkinsons, it was always our plan to ultimately end up in such a place. We have traveled the area and toured at least a half dozen, putting our names on 2 wait lists. At one or two places we came away shaking our heads that this particular set up was not for us. It was worth the effort to shop around! We have now activated our names on the community that is closest to where we now live and we are really looking forward to the move. It has taken 3+ years and now we wait for unit to become available. Can't wait!
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Wish I could get my huzz to agree to that but I can’t even get him interested in moving closer to town.
 
A friend of mine just moved to a really nice one in Charleston. She still drives and has friends outside the community. She’s 79 and enjoys her beautiful apartment and the people as well as some of the activities. It’s expensive but she can afford it.
 
After enjoying living in a 55+ community for 16 years we felt it is time to move to an independent living community in Atlanta to be nearer family. We will be moving next week. If needed down the road, this place has assisted living and memory care. It has been an emotional decision that we have struggled with for 2 years but we think this is right for us. No decision is perfect when it comes to planning out ones next phase but we think this will be good (once the move is over).
 
I live in an apartment just a tenth of a mile from a small town that has everything I need. My apt is small but is ok, the people that live in the town are small minded and self absorbed, they rarely think outside the box. The people who live in the complex (48 apts) are for the most part older and under educated. I have no one to talk to. I have some things to complain about but I also have a good deal to be grateful for.

Sure I'd like a bigger nicer apt but I am not willing to give up the security I have in this one.
 

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