My name isn't "dear", "dearie" or "hon"

Pepper said:
I'm a B too, @Blaze Duskdreamer. I'm not proud of it. I can be mean. I'm not proud of that either. Now I'm in the biggest trouble and I deserve to be there. Doesn't hurt any less knowing that.

I enjoyed your post very much. I don't deserve to enjoy, but thank you for being the honest lady I know you are.
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Just found this.

Mean? Your posts go in many directions, Pepper, never failing to surprise, but you can be very caring. I see it all the time.
 

I don't mind behind called honey, sweety, babe/baby, etc., but I always tell guys not to use the word "love"! It is too powerful of a word to use randomly, so if it is used in any form, I tell them not to do that again. It actually scares me when it is used, and if someone I just met online tells me they are in love with me...I split! LOL
 
Leann said:
I don't get rankled easily but lately I've noticed that young women have started calling me "dear", "dearie" or "hon". Case in point, I was paying for some groceries last week and as the cashier was giving me my change, she said "thanks, dear". Later the same day I had a similar instance where another person called me "hon". I realize I'm not a young chick but I must be an old hen to these younger people. I don't mind if someone calls me "ma'am" but the other names ... no. It sounds insulting to me.

Have you encountered anything similar?
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Yes! But from guys writing me on the internet. Hello dear. HUH? Might as well call me grandma not that I am. The minute I see that it’s deleted. Why do they do that?
 

Last night in the restaurant, the server called us lovie several times. Half the problem was the patronizing tone and perhaps a slight accent. No accent when a table of four men sat down. Since she was still a bit of a flake, I do believe she’d had a bit too much to smoke.
 
I dont let that stuff bother me. For me its not so much what you say as the tone and your attitude. Some people can make saying your name sound sleasy.

For me Hon is for when I feel like you might need a hug. Dude is usually accompanied with an eye roll.
 
If someone calling you Ma'am, Hon, Dear, Love or rankles you, suck it up! YOU are what's wrong with today's WOKE society where everybody must be on pins and needles for fear of saying something wrong. Get over yourself
 
DGM said:
If someone calling you Ma'am, Hon, Dear, Love or rankles you, suck it up! YOU are what's wrong with today's WOKE society where everybody must be on pins and needles for fear of saying something wrong. Get over yourself
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Thank you!
I called the doctor's office yesterday. "Well, darling, if you are sick you come on in, can you be here in an hour?". She can call me darling any time:>)
 
I married late in life, and by then it was considered passe to call someone Mrs.

For that reason alone, I tend to get irritated with all of these false endearments. I long to be called Mrs, as it is still new to me, but people think you want to be called hon, sweetie, or Miss (insert first name)I even had one counselor assure me that I didn't have to take his last name, as if it were an insult. I guess I am old fashioned at heart.
 
carouselsilver said:
I married late in life, and by then it was considered passe to call someone Mrs.

For that reason alone, I tend to get irritated with all of these false endearments. I long to be called Mrs, as it is still new to me, but people think you want to be called hon, sweetie, or Miss (insert first name)I even had one counselor assure me that I didn't have to take his last name, as if it were an insult. I guess I am old fashioned at heart.
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Old fashioned or not it is your choice. You can always correct someone nicely.
Be proud of being Mrs XYZ.!!! There is nothing passe about it.
 
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DGM said:
...what's wrong with today's WOKE society where everybody must be on pins and needles for fear of saying something wrong.
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I've talked to so many people who say things like that, yet if you ask them to explain what woke society is, they don't know. But if that is the description, I guess I have nothing to worry about. I don't fear saying anything to anybody. It's just more political nonsense to stir the pot. Hard pass on that.
 
DGM said:
If someone calling you Ma'am, Hon, Dear, Love or rankles you, suck it up! YOU are what's wrong with today's WOKE society where everybody must be on pins and needles for fear of saying something wrong. Get over yourself
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What does "woke" have to do with anything other than your own agenda?

Anyway, where I live "Dear" or "Love" is used consistently and I have no issue with it. None of the grocery store workers call me "Handsome" but if I receive a "Love" I don't consider it condescending.
 
carouselsilver said:
...people think you want to be called hon, sweetie, or Miss (insert first name)I even had one counselor assure me that I didn't have to take his last name, as if it were an insult. I guess I am old fashioned at heart.
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I suppose that I look at it a little differently, in that it is definitely about whether you like someone or not. If I like a woman that I know from who knows where, chances are I'll be more likely to refer to her as "hon" or "dear" as not. It's not sexual, an attempt to get closer than would otherwise be needed, and I certainly don't mean to be rude. On the other hand, if I don't necessarily like a woman, or if I know she doesn't like that sort of "friendlyness", I am strictly a by the book, respectful Southern Gentleman. I'm sure my Momma is comfortable in her grave and I have no intentions of giving her a reason to roll over on my account.

And if someone writes any of that sort of thing in a post, don't let it bother you. It's just text on your computer screen.
 
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