Phony calls to Child Protective Services.

fuzzybuddy

fuzzybuddy

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Location
The Sticks, Northeast PA.
I admit I don't have any first hand information about this. I don't know what kind of problem this really is. All I know is what I've seen on "Judge Judy". One of the recurring themes on"J.J." are these retaliatory phony calls to Child Protective Services. Last night, on the program, another woman admitted to anonymously calling, a complaint, alleging abusive treatment of a minor, as 'getting back" at a acquaintance, who was a mother.

All of a sudden, a Welfare Agent, who can take your kid, is on your doorstep.This is probably the 10th such admission, or claim, and I rarely watch the show. As I understand it all calls are kept confidential, so that focus remains on the child's welfare, not who ratted the parent out. But, some use this as an easy way to get back at former friends What are your views? And do you have any first hand info?.
 

My ex SIL coached my just-beginning-to-talk niece to tell the doctor that my brother "hurt her down there" once when they were going through a rough patch. The case was investigated and found to be the fabrication it was ...and then he reconciled with the crazy woman and guess what ...she later cheated on him and told a string of lies through the divorce. :rolleyes: But she was caught in those as well. I talked with a friend who worked in the child protective services field at the time that was going on, and she said it's so frustrating to them when people abuse the system for vengeance since it diverts their attention from kids who truly are being abused.
 

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Yes, sadly, lying in general is very common, as is lying without limits, for some sort of revenge or anger or other self-centered motive.:(

This is one of many particularly cruel and disturbing, forms of deception with lies, intended solely to harm others.
"Getting back at former friends or spouses" seems to motivate some people. 😒😖😫
 
The wife of a Sailor who worked for me falsely accused her husband of sexual abuse of their daughter. We had him restricted to the barracks for almost 10 days before she called me at 2AM and told me that it was all a lie. She told me that she did it "just to prove to him that she could hurt him."
We got her into the nearest Naval hospital for evaluation, and her husband initiated a divorce. She got counselling, and that was it to my best knowledge since I transferred.
This kind of thing is very rare, but it does happen.
 
This is one of the most disgusting things you can do to anyone. It’s bad enough that people lie but to falsely accuse someone of something they didn’t do is outrageous, especially when it concerns caring for a loved one. It’s so incredibly damaging to all concerned and a vicious thing to do.

Being vindictive towards anyone doesn’t solve anything since no two wrongs make a right plus there is nothing more insulting to a real rape victim than knowing there are humans nasty enough to make up stories about horrendous abuse that never actually happened. It’s people who lie and deceive others in this way that ruin it for others who really have had to endure these types experiences so is a slap in the face for all concerned.
 
Keesha said:
Exactly. It hurts the others who need the help.
What a horrible thing to do. 🤬
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It is. And is so hurtful to so many people. At the time it happened, my brother and his family lived in the very small town where we grew up. Everyone knew about it, and all knew the characters of both parents so had the truth figured out from the first. But I was always worried about the shame my niece would feel when she eventually learned about it and realized everyone knew.

It's actually child abuse on her mom's part for something like that to be in her history. Thankfully, my brother moved out of state for a job several years later when he and his wife were still together. Neither came back to the hometown after the divorce which I think is a very good thing for my now fifteen year old niece.
 
Its horrendous. I don’t know how these liars can live with themselves? How does one lie to; the man you once loved who fathered your child, the authorities, the child and yourself knowing full well it’s not true and knowing the damage it’s causing?

The child might spend their entire life blaming them self, the other parent has to deal with the lies and the backlash from unfair gossip for an infinite amount of time. There IS shame no matter how it turns out.

Sometimes these lies last for a lifetime and go unresolved. It’s incredibly damaging for everyone and sickening knowing it’s all due to one person’s evil intentions. What I don’t understand is how do these types of liars live with themselves? Personal integrity must not mean anything to them.

And I can really go on about it.
Sorry.
 
My daughter worked for CPS as both an investigator and a supervisor. She often encountered these things -- a non-custodial parent trying to get the other parent in trouble, divorcing parents telling lies about the other, and even teenagers claiming their parents are abusive because the parent took a cell phone away, or whatever. If there is a claim, it must be investigated.

My daughter said it was relatively easy for her to sort it out and to tell who was lying and who was telling the truth, but it did take time. She got very good at telling who was telling the truth and who was not. I know she didn't tell me the worst of the things she encountered, for which I am grateful, but the things she told me were bad enough. The problem with false accusations is that an inexperienced investigator may not recognize it right away, and the parents get put through hell.
 
What I don’t understand is how do these types of liars live with themselves? Personal integrity must not mean anything to them.
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In my ex SILs case it's Narcissistic Personality Disorder of the martyr flavor. That situation was similar to Munchausen syndrome by proxy in an emotional sense. I'm not sure she doesn't work herself into a state of believing her lies when she's angry. She only once later alluded to it in an email to my mom, and barely ...just barely included what might pass for an apology. I don't know what sorts of conversations she, my brother and their counselor had about it.
 
AnnieA said:
My ex SIL coached my just-beginning-to-talk niece to tell the doctor that my brother "hurt her down there" once when they were going through a rough patch. The case was investigated and found to be the fabrication it was ...and then he reconciled with the crazy woman and guess what ...she later cheated on him and told a string of lies through the divorce. :rolleyes: But she was caught in those as well. I talked with a friend who worked in the child protective services field at the time that was going on, and she said it's so frustrating to them when people abuse the system for vengeance since it diverts their attention from kids who truly are being abused.
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He "reconciled with the crazy woman?" HE'S the one who needs professional help.
 
Keesha said:
Its horrendous. I don’t know how these liars can live with themselves? How does one lie to; the man you once loved who fathered your child, the authorities, the child and yourself knowing full well it’s not true and knowing the damage it’s causing?

The child might spend their entire life blaming them self, the other parent has to deal with the lies and the backlash from unfair gossip for an infinite amount of time. There IS shame no matter how it turns out.

Sometimes these lies last for a lifetime and go unresolved. It’s incredibly damaging for everyone and sickening knowing it’s all due to one person’s evil intentions. What I don’t understand is how do these types of liars live with themselves? Personal integrity must not mean anything to them.

And I can really go on about it.
Sorry.
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"Hell hath no fury......"
 
win231 said:
He "reconciled with the crazy woman?" HE'S the one who needs professional help.
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Yep. They went to counseling before they reconciled, then when she pulled her final stunts he needed lots more. From a few of the women he's dated since the divorce, I'm not sure he's not a hopeless case when it comes to choosing female companions.
 
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Pecos said:
The wife of a Sailor who worked for me falsely accused her husband of sexual abuse of their daughter. We had him restricted to the barracks for almost 10 days before she called me at 2AM and told me that it was all a lie. She told me that she did it "just to prove to him that she could hurt him."
We got her into the nearest Naval hospital for evaluation, and her husband initiated a divorce. She got counselling, and that was it to my best knowledge since I transferred.
This kind of thing is very rare, but it does happen.
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"This kind of thing is vey rare??" What planet have you been living on?
 
After I filed for divorce, my ex wife said (under oath) in her declaration that I "Picked her up & threw her down on a sofa, injuring her back." That didn't work out very well for her. When I testified, I said, "Your honor, she weighs 200 lbs. If I could pick her up & throw her anywhere, I'd make a fortune putting on displays of super-human strength." The judge couldn't resist a smile.
She also claimed that I "tried to shoot her brother." How does someone "try" to shoot someone?
Then, during our divorce hearing, when I walked into the courtroom, several deputies surrounded me & asked me if I was carrying a firearm. I said, "Of course not; you're welcome to search me if it makes you more comfortable." The deputy replied, "That won't be necessary." I couldn't figure out why that happened UNTIL I saw them go to my ex wife & yell at her. She tried to get me in trouble (or worse) by telling the bailiff that I carry a gun everywhere & I have one on me right now. One of them told her, "You're lucky we don't arrest you." If we had kids, I can only imagine......

I posted previously about a co-worker who was married for 3 years & had a 1-year-old child. They had a verbal argument & she called police & said he hit her. She showed the officers a bruise on her shoulder she received the day before when she slipped & fell against the kitchen counter. He was arrested & spent 5 days in jail before it was cleared up. He took my advice & divorced her.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
I admit I don't have any first hand information about this. I don't know what kind of problem this really is. All I know is what I've seen on "Judge Judy". One of the recurring themes on"J.J." are these retaliatory phony calls to Child Protective Services. Last night, on the program, another woman admitted to anonymously calling, a complaint, alleging abusive treatment of a minor, as 'getting back" at a acquaintance, who was a mother. All of a sudden, a Welfare Agent, who can take your kid, is on your doorstep.This is probably the 10th such admission, or claim, and I rarely watch the show. As I understand it all calls are kept confidential, so that focus remains on the child's welfare, not who ratted the parent out. But, some use this as an easy way to get back at former friends What are your views? And do you have any first hand info?.
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Even more common: A woman wants a leg up in their divorce, so she accuses her husband of domestic abuse.

The most outrageous thing is that these liars are NEVER prosecuted; even after the guy spends time in prison. If that happened to me, I don't even want to think about what I'd do.
 
win231 said:
Even more common: A woman wants a leg up in their divorce, so she accuses her husband of domestic abuse.

The most outrageous thing is that these liars are NEVER prosecuted; even after the guy spends time in prison. If that happened to me, I don't even want to think about what I'd do.
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It’s very disturbing especially knowing the many woman who actually are abused have a really hard time coming forth. Most of them don’t testify and when they do it’s years later when evidence might be gone.

It’s very sad.😟
 
Keesha said:
It’s very disturbing especially knowing the many woman who actually are abused have a really hard time coming forth. Most of them don’t testify and when they do it’s years later when evidence might be gone.

It’s very sad.😟
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That's exactly what Judge Judy tells these liars - the ones who falsely claim abuse and the ones who call Child Protective Services. She usually awards the maximum $5,000.00.
In many cases, it's the mother-in-law who makes the accusation because she doesn't like her daughter's husband.
 
I don't know what kind of a problem these false to CW is. But judging from "Judge Judy" :))), it seems a rather easy way to screw someone over, especially since the callers are kept legally confidential.
 
When I testified, I said, "Your honor, she weighs 200 lbs. If I could pick her up & throw her anywhere, I'd make a fortune putting on displays of super-human strength." The judge couldn't resist a smile.
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That would have been a great line for the Judge Judy show! 😁
 
I avoid Judge Judy and the other similar tv shows, they present events they feel will attract viewers. Then there is the financial aspect to be considered.

I was in the same racket, adults only, no minors.
Our building housed us and CPS, would wander down there, exchange war stories. Ug! I could not handle the kiddies, no way-nope, someone be dead.

CPS was not above 'flinching' some of the more peculiar items found in the homes (magazines , items you've heard about, not seen...)
I was down there yaking, fella pulled out a magazine titled 'Golden Showers.'
I was fortyish, unaware that such material was actually available.
The subjects were adults, thank goodness.
 

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