Really OLD photos in obituaries

[applecruncher]

I heard yesterday that the mother of a high school friend died at age 87. I looked up the obituary in the online hometown newspaper, and there was a photo of the woman when she was (probably) about 17 – 18! (I met the woman once about 20 yrs ago when she would have been in her 60s, she was attractive.)

I don’t understand why people put such dated, ancient pictures in an obituary. Some people don't have/take many pictures. I don't. But you can bet I/others have decent pictures of me as an adult.

I can understand if someone is very ill, bedridden, emaciated, etc. they don’t want a picture taken. But even a 20/30 yr old picture would be better than an old high school picture that no one recognizes anyway.

Is there something I’m missing? Why do people do this?

 

[halalu]

I don't take pictures. My pictures never reflect the same image I see in the mirror. Now I have gained weight and I am older and I don't want to take pictures. I don't have a man and I don't go out so I seldom dress up and I have no need to take pictures.

 

[SeaBreeze]

I think it's a personal family choice, maybe they prefer to show a photo of that person when they were in their prime, or when they were still healthy. Maybe the person requested before they died to have a photo of them that most people in their community would recognize, like when they were still in school.

 

[halalu]

I think it's a personal family choice, maybe they prefer to show a photo of that person when they were in their prime, or when they were still healthy. Maybe the person requested before they died to have a photo of them that most people in their community would recognize, like when they were still in school.

Good answer!

 

[AZ Jim]

I don't see it as anyone's business but the immediate family.

 

[hollydolly]

I have to agree with the majority here !

 

[Cookie]

I agree with SeaBreeze, the people seeing the picture might better recognize the deceased by a younger photo. When an aunt passed away, the funeral home ran an online slideshow with about a dozen or so photographs from different stages of her life and it stays on for several years.

 

[applecruncher]

cookie, those slideshows are nice. They had one at my aunt's service. Showed her at 20, 30, 50, and so on. It was well done.

 

[Laurie]

My wife has just died, earlier this month. She was 74.

I chose a picture of her at 34, a mature, attractive, happy woman.

That's how I remember her, and that's how I want her remembered.

 

[Shalimar]

Condolences on your loss, Laurie. I think honouring your wife in that way was a beautiful and loving thing to do.

 

[hollydolly]

My wife has just died, earlier this month. She was 74.

I chose a picture of her at 34, a mature, attractive, happy woman.

That's how I remember her, and that's how I want her remembered.

Oh Laurie , I had no idea your wife had died , I'm so sorry for your pain, please accept my condolences !

 

[SifuPhil]

I already have mine picked out for the papers. Admittedly it's from my youth, but ...

 

[Pappy]

I hope that's not a slingshot. It could be trouble.:holymoly:

 

[Shirley]

OMG! A hairy man with a beard! Somebody hold me back!!!!!!

 

[Debby]

My wife has just died, earlier this month. She was 74.

I chose a picture of her at 34, a mature, attractive, happy woman.

That's how I remember her, and that's how I want her remembered.

I'm sorry to hear that she left before you Laurie! Hard to be left behind isn't it? And I think it was really nice of you to chose a mid-life picture. That will always be your reminder of good times rather than the end of days. I know if I go before my husband, I would hope he'll chose a mid-life photo also. Actually I have no doubt that he'll do that, he's really good about deleting any that he takes that he knows I'd hate.

 

[Debby]

Sorry Phil but I think that photo is just plain creepy.

 

[hollydolly]

**Barrrf** at that photo Phil (not your face) but ... I've always detested that Ali G thong picture....I could throw up.. :stop:

 

[SeaBreeze]

Laurie, my condolences for your loss. :rose:

 

[SifuPhil]

I hope that's not a slingshot. It could be trouble.

Sorry Phil but I think that photo is just plain creepy.

**Barrrf** at that photo Phil (not your face) but ... I've always detested that Ali G thong picture....I could throw up..

Well, I guess that's 3 less people I should plan on to show up for my ceremony ...

OMG! A hairy man with a beard! Somebody hold me back!!!!!!

Ah ... +1!

 

[chic]

I don't think it's creepy at all for someone to want a high school picture in their obituary or even on their tombstone, something that is very popular where I live.
Maybe where you live this isn't common or acceptable but lots of people do it here. I think it's nice. It helps people to know what a dead person looked like when they were in their salad days which maybe how they want to be remembered. I've already chosen my tombstone photo which is from high school and I love and it will make me happy to know it's on my grave marker for all eternity.

The wishes of the dead person should be uppermost in this matter. Why not?

 

[jujube]

The picture I used for my husband's was of him in the grungiest of fishing clothes, holding up a large bass and grinning like a fool. That's the way I want to remember him.