Reflections of My Life

Having my coffee while listening to the sound of snow removal going on in the streets. I watched 'first light" gradually come in but could not open my black out curtains to watch it better. Too cold for my bunny boy if I did that so early. Not sure which project I will tackle from my list of things to do first but after I am done with coffee.

I have been making memes out of my own pictures and it is a sentimental journey for sure. Going back into my pictures from before I moved here. I don't really regret anything I have done (even though I never claim to be snow white). It is all part of acquiring wisdom in my learning process. I think that is part of the life journey. So when you are learning while you are aging you begin to understand why certain things happened the way they did.

I keep wondering what is wrong with me? Why do I like to be alone more than with others? I do though. When someone comes to visit me at first I like it and enjoy the conversation. Then there comes a point where I start wishing they would leave. I keep reminding myself that I need to talk to others more. Maybe that is why I like to visit with people outside of my apartment. Then I can leave whenever I want.
 
katlupe said:
I keep wondering what is wrong with me? Why do I like to be alone more than with others? I do though. When someone comes to visit me at first I like it and enjoy the conversation. Then there comes a point where I start wishing they would leave. I keep reminding myself that I need to talk to others more. Maybe that is why I like to visit with people outside of my apartment. Then I can leave whenever I want.
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There is nothing wrong with that, it's your nature to like to be alone. I think it can be unhealthy to fight our natural inclinations, unless like some people you believe you should be forever pushing outside your comfort level for improvement in yourself. I'm afraid I'm too old for that.
 

gruntlabor said:
There is nothing wrong with that, it's your nature to like to be alone. I think it can be unhealthy to fight our natural inclinations, unless like some people you believe you should be forever pushing outside your comfort level for improvement in yourself. I'm afraid I'm too old for that.
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Maybe I get more meaningful conversations right here. Not small talk so much.

I got Rabbit a supplement cookie for rabbits that is for healthy joints for aging bunnies. I put it down on his blanket and then walked away. Acted like I was not trying to trick him into taking something. It is a dried type of cookie, they bake them. I looked over and saw him eating it right down. I guess I won't have a problem giving that to him. Now if I tried to hold it in front of him to get him to take it, I bet he wouldn't. It smelled good.
 
katlupe said:
I keep wondering what is wrong with me? Why do I like to be alone more than with others? I do though. When someone comes to visit me at first I like it and enjoy the conversation. Then there comes a point where I start wishing they would leave. I keep reminding myself that I need to talk to others more.
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The answer to your question is that there is *nothing* at all wrong with you. I'm the same way and always have been. I was an "it's too peopley out there" person LONG before it was cool and that saying became a meme.

I'm not shy... I'm not antisocial because I have no problem being "one of the crowd" when necessary. I just enjoy interaction more online where I get to have time to think about what I'm saying. I've had more than a few "oh good gracious, why did you SAY that?!" moments. :sneaky: I started writing (via pen & paper) to pen pals when I was about 17... had more than 80 at once back then. Just always been more comfortable with the written word.

Anyhow, happy Wednesday to you and Rabbit! Lucky boy... wish I could eat cookies for healthy joints. 🤭
 
katlupe said:
Maybe I get more meaningful conversations right here. Not small talk so much.

I got Rabbit a supplement cookie for rabbits that is for healthy joints for aging bunnies. I put it down on his blanket and then walked away. Acted like I was not trying to trick him into taking something. It is a dried type of cookie, they bake them. I looked over and saw him eating it right down. I guess I won't have a problem giving that to him. Now if I tried to hold it in front of him to get him to take it, I bet he wouldn't. It smelled good.
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Kat, I think you're right. I think i you didn't have access to conversations here, you'd probably more actively look for it outside. :)
 
katlupe said:
Having my coffee while listening to the sound of snow removal going on in the streets. I watched 'first light" gradually come in but could not open my black out curtains to watch it better. Too cold for my bunny boy if I did that so early. Not sure which project I will tackle from my list of things to do first but after I am done with coffee.

I have been making memes out of my own pictures and it is a sentimental journey for sure. Going back into my pictures from before I moved here. I don't really regret anything I have done (even though I never claim to be snow white). It is all part of acquiring wisdom in my learning process. I think that is part of the life journey. So when you are learning while you are aging you begin to understand why certain things happened the way they did.

I keep wondering what is wrong with me? Why do I like to be alone more than with others? I do though. When someone comes to visit me at first I like it and enjoy the conversation. Then there comes a point where I start wishing they would leave. I keep reminding myself that I need to talk to others more. Maybe that is why I like to visit with people outside of my apartment. Then I can leave whenever I want.
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that's me.small talk is it my forte.i can go weeks and not see or talk to anyone.except my cat he just listens.
 
I was in the hospital 55 years ago......last night actually, the 12th. Waiting to have my baby. My aunt took me to my doctor and he sent me to the hospital. I was scared but was able to hang out with the young mothers who had already given birth. Finally at 12:33 AM on the 14th I had my baby. I cannot believe it was that long ago and so much has happened in my life since then. I can remember every moment of my life and many times I think back over it and wonder how I made it this far.

I remember my mother coming to me when she found out I was pregnant and telling me I could have the baby and give it up for adoption. I said no, don't want to do that. Abortion was not an option back then and I am glad it wasn't. Otherwise I might not have my precious son. I would be alone. Him and I kind of grew up together. He drives me crazy at times but I would not trade him for the world.

Sonny had that procedure yesterday.....the one that is supposed to relieve him of his pain for up to a year. Sounds impossible to me. He said it hurts while they are doing it (no thanks, not for me! I don't do anything that will cause me any pain.) but after he got home it was just achy. So he will see if it was worth it or not.

I am supposed to have a hair appointment tomorrow but might have to cancel it. It is cold and raining now but that could turn to icy conditions by tomorrow. So I will see. I can call her the same day because she knows I have health issues and that I walk to my appointments. I hate to miss it but I do what I have to do.

Water delivery comes today. So I will be on the lookout for it. I wanted to order groceries but not going to do that if it is raining. Hate to bring in a bag of wet food. So more coffee right now............
 
OMG Kat...I laughed with astonishment when you I read what your mother said, because my father said exactly the same to me...

he told me to have the baby taken away.. when i refused he said , ok then have it and then have it adopted.. I wasn't ever going to do that, but just because I'd got pregnant before I got married, this was his bluddy solution to it... I married the father of my daughter a few months later ..and never spoke to my father willingly again for many years
 
hollydolly said:
OMG Kat...I laughed with astonishment when you I read what your mother said, because my father said exactly the same to me...

he told me to have the baby taken away.. when i refused he said , ok then have it and then have it adopted.. I wasn't ever going to do that, but just because I'd got pregnant before I got married, this was his bluddy solution to it... I married the father of my daughter a few months later ..and never spoke to my father willingly again for many years
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Well after that, my mother became obsessed with my son. I lived with my parents and she did everything for him. She had come from a big family and always wanted lots of children but due to her health issues could not. Just my brother and me. So she stepped into the role of being a doting grandmother quite easily.

I did not marry his father. He was in jail and ended up in prison for 10 years. I married someone else 9 years later and he adopted Jeff. I told you I was not good at picking out a man. 🙂
 
Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Looks like a major snowstorm out there this morning. No hair appointment for sure. Not taking a chance walking on the sidewalks in snow. Now if it was a dirt road or a path through the woods I could do that. I loved to walk in the snow! Sadly, not something I can do now. I needed to order groceries, my bunny is low on greens. I will wait and see what the weather is like later on. Even though I prefer grocery delivery in the mornings I don't like to make them drive on bad roads.

As of yesterday, Sonny was happy with his procedure. He had no pain at all. The doctor told him not to do anything much for the first 48 hours so he is taking it easy right now.
 
Good morning. Crazy how different the weather is when we are quite close in proximity. The sun is peeking out and I can see patches of blue sky. We are supposed to get a lot of snow tomorrow. Yuck. I'm sick of snow. Happy Valentine's Day!
 
I woke up this morning later than normal. Is that getting to be a habit? Or am I staying up later watching YT? Don't know. So I look out the window and see we had more snow and it is very cold. I check the weather on my phone and supposed to have heavy snow starting around noon. I NEED to order groceries! I don't want the driver have to drive here in heavy snow........so I swallow my frugalist nature and pay five bucks for three hours or less. So should be around ten or so. Now I am hurrying through my coffee so I can take a quick shower and be presentable.
Rabbit had eaten the last of his spring mix and I am almost out of cream for my coffee so had to get groceries.

Last night my friend called me and I know I must sound like the most boring person in the world on the phone. It is difficult to make my life sound interesting to someone who used to know me when I was into the "modern homesteading" life. She wants to tell me all the food she has prepped or canned and I don't do any of that since moving here. We have nothing in common except we used to be friends. My friendship with her is rocky at the most. She is not a tactful person and I don't like that trait in people.

It is not that my life is boring but to other people who do not live here it may be so. I watch the videos by Bob Wells (cheap rving) and it is interesting to me even though I have no desire to live in a van or an rv. I hate to drive and driving across the country does not appeal to me. I am happy at home and it is my desire to live here forever. I like to watch to see how people maximize their small spaces. My apartment is small at 338 square feet and so I learn from others though I think mine is pretty much the way I want or need it.
 
Snowing like crazy here today. Glad I don't have a car to clean off. The only thing that worries me about it is that we could have a power outage. NYSEG sent me an email to alert me to that fact. I wish they hadn't. Better when I don't know till it happens. So I am cooking my supper right now and on my computer.
 
Thanking God that we did not have that power outage during the night. Since I live downtown it is rare that I have one. Mostly due to trees falling on a wire. I have not looked out the window yet but can hear someone cleaning off the ramp. Sounds slushy. I think we are supposed to have a mixture of rain and snow today.

Last night and today already I started watching a YT channel where the guy travels to small towns in KS (he does all states but today it is KS). This town, Englewood, has only 58 people living there and no children. Most of the homes are abandoned. No stores. No gas stations. No schools. There is a post office though. Sad to see, even cars were left at the homes. No place to work either. I think these little towns could be future homes for homeless or low income people. Maybe people on disability. All you really need is some stores, medical and a gas station. The houses cost less than a pick up truck but they need work. If they wait too long it will be too late for the houses left there.

I am thinking about making a pork shoulder roast today in the Instant Pot. Not sure yet. I have to go downstairs today to see my friend. I have 2 zip loc bags of gel pens for her. Brand new pens and refills. I only like to use glitter ones so I give her all the others. I think she will be home due to the weather. Otherwise on Sunday she usually drives to Walmart. The only day she ever drives her car. She will walk with her walker or use her mobility scooter around town. Even if it is pretty far. Walmart is outside of town.

Well, time for more coffee.........
 
Glad to hear you didn't lose power. I have high warnings here today, so hoping I have the same good luck... but have a portable propane heater if needed. Last January the power went out for 18 hours after a high wind.

I think that's a great idea you mentioned about transforming those abandoned small towns... especially for homeless and/or low income. (y)
 

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