Senior Dating

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RandomName said:
Something I have been wondering about. Do women over 50 simply not have s*xual desires, or is it that they are taking care of those desires without any help from men?
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Personally, I don't think there is an answer to your question because it's gender and age specific and I don't believe people work that way. Some people have desires right up until the day they leave this world, others may never really see the attraction and, maybe most people, will have come to a point in their lives where they value a loving relationship and mutual respect first, rather than a bag of cold chips and a quick shag. :) (are we allowed to write "shag"? :eek:)
 
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RandomName said:
Do women over 50 simply not have s*xual desires...?
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Some do, and I suspect most do, and some may just be getting started, but of course, I can't be sure about all women. Men my age spent our formative years growing up thinking men wanted sex more than women, and I believe women were taught the same thing. My high school years seemed to reinforce that notion. Even my undergraduate years made it seem that way, but then came the sexual revolution and that required a reevaluation of our beliefs. I began to challenge much of what I had been taught, and found that much of it didn't appear to be accurate, and some if it was just plain wrong. It wasn't all about sex, either. It took years to undo some of the crap I was taught. Do I have it all sorted out now? I would never assume such a thing.
 
Trish said:
Personally, I don't think there is an answer to your question because it's gender and age specific and I don't believe people work that way. Some people have desires right up until the day they leave this world, others may never really see the attraction and, maybe most people, will have come to a point in their lives where they value a loving relationship and mutual respect first, rather than a bag of cold chips and a quick shag. :) (are we allowed to write "shag"? :eek:)
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"A cold bag of chips and a quick shag". I like it ! I'm going to use that line ! Thanks! (Just kidding!)

I know there is someone on this board who believes I will actually use that line, lol. :)
 
RandomName said:
"A cold bag of chips and a quick shag". I like it ! I'm going to use that line ! Thanks! (Just kidding!)

I know there is someone on this board who believes I will actually use that line, lol. :)
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You're welcome :)

Well, it is a forum and posting invites opinons which we may not always like but, often times, it's the disagreeing opinions which are the more interesting.

My opinion, for what it's worth, is that the only people who will be affected by anything we choose to do are those we choose to do it with so, if you are consenting adults both wanting the same thing, I don't see a problem. Enjoy the chips ;)
 
Re women and sx after fifty. In my experience, some lose interest, some want relationships, others don’t, for a variety of reasons. Some want uncomplicated friends with benefits scenario, others care for their needs themselves.

Mixed bag, really. I have taught some courses on female sx uality, open to all age groups, fascinating stuff. Some of the older women were amazing.
 
Shalimar said:
Re women and sx after fifty. In my experience, some lose interest, some want relationships, others don’t, for a variety of reasons. Some want uncomplicated friends with benefits scenario, others care for their needs themselves.

Mixed bag, really. I have taught some courses on female sx uality, open to all age groups, fascinating stuff. Some of the older women were amazing.
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I first heard the saying 'friends with benefits' on the paternity show, (what a mixed up lot they are) but I did enjoy the saying all the same. ;)
 
Having only just now browsed this thread some but not all..

About sexuality it is the way we experience and express ourselves sexually. It involves feelings, desires, actions, and identity, and can include many different types of physical touch and things,. Intimacy imo is a feeling of closeness and connectedness in a relationship that can occur with or without a physical component, so for senior dating same would apply. That is all I have to say, now on to the Color Crayon thread.
 
Mitch86 said:
Don't forget to use 'Instant Checkmate" to see the back ground of your potential date. You wouldn't want to date a felon or someone with other bad background.
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Some of those sites are kind of hinky. I ran my name once and it came back that I was in real estate(NO), was single (NO), had a salary of about $40K (I am retired) and was 55 (NO)
 
RandomName said:
Hey, Blessed, I think you have me confused with some image in your mind of someone who hurt you? Or your girlfriends have told you stories about the mean guys they have dated?

Have you read my previous posts? I already said I want affection and that does not necessarily require sex.

Where did I say I want a maid and a cook? Nowhere.

Where did I say I was great because I was breathing? Nowhere.

Sounds like you are bitter about something, and you want me to be that thing you are bitter about,
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Where did Blessed say you were an image of someone who hurt her? Nowhere.
Where did Blessed say her girlfriends told her abut mean men like you? Nowhere.
Where did Blessed say she was bitter about something? Nowhere
You would do better to avoid emotional imaginings and stick to facts,
If you want a date, focus on that and not every possible outcome from getting one.
 
Jan14 said:
Of course many women still have physical desires. If a man over 50 doesn’t know how to ignite it, that’s the problem Gentlemen.
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I haven't "ignited" sex for 30 years now and I am 87. My wife and I do NOT want any more kids since we already have 2 kids, six grandkids and a couple of great grandkids. I enjoy myself playing chess and Civilization VI.
 
Trish said:
Personally, I don't think there is an answer to your question because it's gender and age specific and I don't believe people work that way. Some people have desires right up until the day they leave this world, others may never really see the attraction and, maybe most people, will have come to a point in their lives where they value a loving relationship and mutual respect first, rather than a bag of cold chips and a quick shag. :) (are we allowed to write "shag"? :eek:)
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Maybe the censor didn't blip it out because censor doesn't 'speak' British? :ROFLMAO:
 
Jan14 said:
Of course many women still have physical desires. If a man over 50 doesn’t know how to ignite it, that’s the problem Gentlemen.
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Wow, I agree with this. After being married for over 50 years, if I have learned anything, I have learned that making love is best if you start the process way before you ever touch. All women have a desire.

Talk, have a meal, go dancing, or to a concert. Make a day of it or a weekend. Get back in touch with her eyes, her smile, her scent. Share your thoughts, enjoy who she is and what she wants. Do something together that you both truly enjoy.

Later when you first touch, touch softly, quietly, slowly. Give her time to respond to your touch. Wait until she lets you know what she wants! Then and only then should you proceed, letting her show you and/or tell you how she feels. etc. etc.

Guys are wired wrong, so they must learn how to love a woman. Women, have to be patient and good teachers as men's egos are very fragile in topics of love.
 
OK, guys. Status report from RandomName here.

I was keeping quiet so as not to ruin my luck. I've had 2 dates with nice women in the last 2 weeks. They were both from social groups I go to.

For the first date we walked around a park, with her two dogs, then came back to my place and talked and watched TV, and had bagels with butter.

The second was with my 'hottie' who already had said she would go out with me as a friend. I finally got the nerve to ask her out for a specific day and time, and we went to a music recital, then walked around town, and ended up at a bar where I bought her dinner and a beer. We talked until 1 AM. Still just friends, but that's fine, and is part of the deal, anyway.

Oh, yeah, I got a kiss at the end of both dates, and they said to call them any time! So, some good news. Yay !
 
RandomName said:
OK, guys. Status report from RandomName here.

I was keeping quiet so as not to ruin my luck. I've had 2 dates with nice women in the last 2 weeks. They were both from social groups I go to.

For the first date we walked around a park, with her two dogs, then came back to my place and talked and watched TV, and had bagels with butter.

The second was with my 'hottie' who already had said she would go out with me as a friend. I finally got the nerve to ask her out for a specific day and time, and we went to a music recital, then walked around town, and ended up at a bar where I bought her dinner and a beer. We talked until 1 AM. Still just friends, but that's fine, and is part of the deal, anyway.

Oh, yeah, I got a kiss at the end of both dates, and they said to call them any time! So, some good news. Yay !
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@RandomName , good for you! You must be doing something right! The second date would be a perfect one for me, starting with the agreement to go as friends. That lets both off the hook for calling it a date.
 
It would seem that senior couples can figure out the dating thing much like younger couples. People meet, go on dates, learn about each other and discuss attitudes, events, likes, dislikes, etc., etc. If there is a connection the process will develop or should develop in an orderly process. If one or the other partner is not interested in sex or any other activity for that matter, if will be evident after a few dates. If one of the partners is too pushy or just not appealing over the long term, it should be easy enough to cut things off and go in another direction. If there is a sexual attraction that will be evident too, after a short time. Open and honest discussion is likely to follow or should regarding expectations from either partner. The advantage of our age is knowing much more than we did in our 20's. We know what is satisfying and what is not. We know what we liked or did not like from previous relationships and should be bright enough to avoid repeating our errors of the past.
 
NorthernLight said:
Women over 50 might or might not have physical desires. If they do, they might or might not take care of them somehow.

But many over-50 women are done with relationships, and will not get into a relationship just to have ***.
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I am sure that is true, but couldn't the same be said for some men? And some men and women under 50?

People are people...
 
I've reached a point where I have zero interest in being married or even having a "boyfriend". Too many of the men in my age group (80+) who are still around feel that the woman in a relationship should accept a subordinate position. No, thank you. I own my own home, am debt free and control my own finances - and I like it that way. I don't even date - haven't since 2001 and I frankly don't miss it at all.
 
Well, I but the brakes on dating for 12 years after my divorce. Too much hassle, not on the same page with what a soft date was, too controlling after one date, expectations glaring at me, and more.....I'm not that great of a catch, but I can be entertaining at times.:)

I'm now considering perhaps finding someone to date occasionally, nothing too heavy, just enjoying new company.
Now, if only I can find what I did with that stick to beat them off 'cuz the line was too long.....I want to be prepared.:unsure:

I'll worry about the s***** attraction at a later date. After I finish laughing at myself posting this nonsense.
 
rwb said:
It would seem that senior couples can figure out the dating thing much like younger couples. People meet, go on dates, learn about each other and discuss attitudes, events, likes, dislikes, etc., etc. If there is a connection the process will develop or should develop in an orderly process. If one or the other partner is not interested in sex or any other activity for that matter, if will be evident after a few dates. If one of the partners is too pushy or just not appealing over the long term, it should be easy enough to cut things off and go in another direction. If there is a ****** attraction that will be evident too, after a short time. Open and honest discussion is likely to follow or should regarding expectations from either partner. The advantage of our age is knowing much more than we did in our 20's. We know what is satisfying and what is not. We know what we liked or did not like from previous relationships and should be bright enough to avoid repeating our errors of the past.
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So how many senior dates have you had using this procedure? The problem for elder seniors with mobility issues is stated in your second sentence. It is hard for elder seniors with mobility issues to meet each other.
 
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