Stay-At-Home Moms

ClassicRockr

ClassicRockr

Well-known Member
Thought about this the other day:

Does anyone realize how much salary a husband has to make so his wife can be a "stay at home mom" for their kid/kids? I know there are moms out there that could have a part-time job at home, but still. I mean, the husband is relied upon the pay for all the bills.......mortgage (if buying a house), car payments, food, whatever.

Just wonder how much a husband would have to make today in order for his wife to be a "stay at home mom"? In some cases, that also would mean the husband would have to have a major college degree.
 
QuickSilver said:
I think I read this somewhere once.. If I recall, it would be around $50K per year with a health benefit package included
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Whew,not here in California. Housing costs are so high that $50,000 would mean that somebody wouldn`t be eating lol. I would say at least $75,000 but,of course,it would depend on how many children and where you live.
 
My daughter is a stay at home Mum [or Mom]:) Her husband is a policeman, so that's about £35,000 a year before tax, pensions and National Insurance is taken from it.
 
Much of it depends upon the area of the country a person lives in, and the overall cost of living. There are places on the East and West Coasts where $100K a year might not afford much more than $50K a year can in much of the MidWest. My wife never worked outside the home....she chose a full time career raising the kids, and supplying us all with a clean house, and excellent meals. My job allowed us to live decently, become debt free sometime in the mid 80's, and still sock enough away to build up a decent savings/IRA....and my income fell pretty much only slightly above the Middle Class Median. We learned from our parents the wisdom of living within our means, and those lessons served us well.

However, that kind of lifestyle seems to be increasingly hard for our younger generations. I don't pry into the kids finances, but our daughters and husbands do pretty well with the Son-in-Laws working full time, and the daughters just doing some Part time work. But...the Grandkids seem to have the need for both husband and wife to work. For them, juggling the finances, and things like day care for the great grandkids, etc., is a real chore...if often wonder just how much money the granddaughters really make after all the child care expenses, etc., that they have to pay.

It's all symptomatic of the gradually increasing decline in our Middle Class...the rich get richer, and the working people have to jump through hoops. The poor get government assistance, but the bulk of the working people are left to fend for themselves.
 
Don M. said:
Much of it depends upon the area of the country a person lives in, and the overall cost of living. There are places on the East and West Coasts where $100K a year might not afford much more than $50K a year can in much of the MidWest. My wife never worked outside the home....she chose a full time career raising the kids, and supplying us all with a clean house, and excellent meals. My job allowed us to live decently, become debt free sometime in the mid 80's, and still sock enough away to build up a decent savings/IRA....and my income fell pretty much only slightly above the Middle Class Median. We learned from our parents the wisdom of living within our means, and those lessons served us well.

However, that kind of lifestyle seems to be increasingly hard for our younger generations. I don't pry into the kids finances, but our daughters and husbands do pretty well with the Son-in-Laws working full time, and the daughters just doing some Part time work. But...the Grandkids seem to have the need for both husband and wife to work. For them, juggling the finances, and things like day care for the great grandkids, etc., is a real chore...if often wonder just how much money the granddaughters really make after all the child care expenses, etc., that they have to pay.

It's all symptomatic of the gradually increasing decline in our Middle Class...the rich get richer, and the working people have to jump through hoops. The poor get government assistance, but the bulk of the working people are left to fend for themselves.
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Ditto....
 
There is expense involved in being a working mom which offsets the salary a woman makes working outside the home. Extra for transportation, either bus or a vehicle which uses gas and requires insurance.

After a full day of work usually it is convenience or take out meals a lot of time. If a professional figure on extras like clothing, lunches out.

And a real biggie is babysitting or daycare costs.
 
darroll said:
The kids need a stay-at-home-mom.
All they learn in school is how to act like a tramp.
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Yeah? Well in my experience... kids also NEED to eat...have shelter, clothes and medical care..... in today's economy.. it's really become a luxury to have a stay at home parent..

just curious... how does having a stay at home mom stop them from learning bad habits from their peers any more than having a working mom?
 
Most mothers where I live work part time, balancing some time in the home and some in paid work. Few fathers make the same career sacrifice and at the end of the working lifetime women have a lot less to retire on.
 
QuickSilver said:
Yeah? Well in my experience... kids also NEED to eat...have shelter, clothes and medical care..... in today's economy.. it's really become a luxury to have a stay at home parent..

just curious... how does having a stay at home mom stop them from learning bad habits from their peers any more than having a working mom?
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Here the kids try on condoms on a pickle for a starter. I don't think Moms teach that in class.
 
Darroll, that particular lesson helps to save lives (AIDS) and also to prevent teenage pregnancies that blight young lives.
It's probably as necessary today as lessons on hygiene such as hand washing after visiting the toilet.
 
QuickSilver said:
Yeah? Well in my experience... kids also NEED to eat...have shelter, clothes and medical care..... in today's economy.. it's really become a luxury to have a stay at home parent..

just curious... how does having a stay at home mom stop them from learning bad habits from their peers any more than having a working mom?
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I was a stay at home mom and I was a kid who came home to an empty house much of my life so I can tell you the difference. When I got home, I brought friends home occasionally. Safe enough before I hit puberty, but after I got to my teens, that was definitely a potential problem. Although in truth, I was more likely to go over to a friends place and hang out because my mom wasn't home and expecting me to arrive. My big concern when I had kids was that they would carry on like I had when I was in my teens.

My kids on the other hand, got picked up from school by me and they didn't hang around with neighbourhood kids because they went to a more distant school. I was there to talk with them the minute they got in the car and we were together until they went to bed. I was the influence on my kids outside of school, instead of a bunch of kids to hang out with. My youngest had one rough year and the first time she lied to us and went out to a party with friends, we changed her school within the next two weeks. She straightened up entirely and never strayed again. I think that was attributable to the relationship of total involvement with them.

When they were really little and I would go out taking the dog for a walk early in the morning and seeing other moms piling little ones into the car to head off to babysitters and daycares, I was terribly grateful for the life position in which I lived. My mom was a working, single mother and from the kid perspective I know that it's an awful hard haul.
 
Debby said:
I was a stay at home mom and I was a kid who came home to an empty house much of my life so I can tell you the difference. When I got home, I brought friends home occasionally. Safe enough before I hit puberty, but after I got to my teens, that was definitely a potential problem. Although in truth, I was more likely to go over to a friends place and hang out because my mom wasn't home and expecting me to arrive. My big concern when I had kids was that they would carry on like I had when I was in my teens.

My kids on the other hand, got picked up from school by me and they didn't hang around with neighbourhood kids because they went to a more distant school. I was there to talk with them the minute they got in the car and we were together until they went to bed. I was the influence on my kids outside of school, instead of a bunch of kids to hang out with. My youngest had one rough year and the first time she lied to us and went out to a party with friends, we changed her school within the next two weeks. She straightened up entirely and never strayed again. I think that was attributable to the relationship of total involvement with them.

When they were really little and I would go out taking the dog for a walk early in the morning and seeing other moms piling little ones into the car to head off to babysitters and daycares, I was terribly grateful for the life position in which I lived. My mom was a working, single mother and from the kid perspective I know that it's an awful hard haul.
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Lucky you!! Not everyone gets that option..
 
Dame Warrigal said:
Darroll, that particular lesson helps to save lives (AIDS) and also to prevent teenage pregnancies that blight young lives.
It's probably as necessary today as lessons on hygiene such as hand washing after visiting the toilet.
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Yes but they are starting at such an early age, When I was young all I wanted to do was play on the jungle Jim.
I also thought the girls were only good for breaking our projects.
I'm married and my wife does not break my projects.
 
There are just too many factors involved to give a good response to this question. For example. Where does the family live? Living costs vary considerably in different parts of the U.S. Does the male working spouse have benefits on his job/ pension/family health benefits/disability/life insurance. Are they renting or buying a home? How many cars do they have? How much debt do they have?
 
QuickSilver said:
Lucky you!! Not everyone gets that option..
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Your right, my family was very lucky and I'm sure lots of parents would love to have the option to be with their kids. Unfortunately our governments policies and the increase of costs to live and our changed expectations have 'changed' how kids are raised.

My oldest has gotten migraines since she was about four years old. Terrible to see a little child suffering from repeated migraines! But she said to me last year, that in one way, she didn't hate her migraines. She said when she got them, and I would sit on the side of her bed, talking quietly to her in her darkened room and taking care of her if she was throwing up, she actually felt so safe and even more so when she would get them when she was at school and I would have to go and get her to bring her home to put her to bed. If I'd had to work I couldn't have done that for her at all because she used to get two or three headaches a week. So you're right, we were blessed.
 
I was fortunate to be a stay at home Mom and I believe it benefits the children. My Husband worked 2 jobs to make it possible for me to stay home and raise my children.
Since many other Mothers worked my home was were all the kids came to. I loved it and don't regret for a minute the things I wouldn't buy for myself or places I wouldn't go to because my only concerns were for my children and my husband.
 
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