Striking back in relationships, (no not physically obviously)

I'm not so sure you can cancel feelings of love, certainly not easily, not least because they come from our unconscious brain I believe, hence outside the control of ones will, (that's my experience too).

However your other points are well made.
 

This was written by an Australian friend of mine who used to milk cows for a living, (doing rather well at the job considering he wasn't born to it). The poem is very poignant, even sad, I think you'll agree, (and I'm reposting it here as it didn't receive the attention it deserved elsewhere on the forum):

The peace of children in their beds

The peace of children in their bed
Denies the fears in a fathers head

He must provide, he must not fail
His children must, through their lives sail

It's up to him to pave the way
His deepest thoughts he can't convey

For deep within a fathers mind
Despite his efforts to be kind

Are doubts and fears beyond compare
For his little children sleeping there

They'll never know how hard it's been
To protect them from the unforeseen

Their lives will leave them unaware
Of the stress involved in a fathers care

Of his sleepless nights, his constant fears
Of his powerful love and joyful tears

As he watched them sleeping safe and sound
With no one to threaten, or their lives confound

As they grow and develop, and each achieves
He carefully informs, but never deceives

These two will remain intact and complete
Their dad won't ever, let evil defeat

The care and protection he's there to provide
No one can push a real father aside

But as they do, his children will grow
And the lives he provides, will never show

How hard he tried, against impossible odds
To spare their backs, from life's painful rods

In their ignorance his children will most likely condemn
The enormous efforts he’s made for them

For how can they know a life different to theirs?
Unless one of them actually, looks and compares

Their father’s pathway, and his life
Before he made their mother his wife

The children came first from then you see
There was no room for selfish, in his family

By hook or by crook, their dreams all came true
Their father kept working, he knew what to do

His children will never be living his life
Trying so hard, with such trouble and strife

Life must be different for his children you see
"I don't want my children living like me"

It must be accepted, sometimes kids fall
That's when a father needs only a call

Always there to lend a hand
Making a cubby or playing with sand

A joyful, carefree, happy life
That's all he wants for his children and wife

Yet here he sits, alone and confused
His efforts all wasted, completely abused

His family aren’t here, though he's done no wrong
What are they thinking, he’s been so strong

Look at their lives’, can’t they all see
Without his efforts, where they might be?

They’ve never cleaned toilets or others muck
They’ve never ever, been down on their luck

All they have known has been only the best
Because their father didn't stop to rest

He just kept going, believing they cared
Now they are hiding or running scared

But scared of what, he wonders aloud
He looks back at his life and can only be proud

He did his best, they can't deny that
Most other people are dipping their hat

To a man who gave more than many others
He put them all first, couldn't have his druthers

They all enjoy the best of lives
Let’s hope their good fortune always survives

That they never experience, such bitterness and hate
After such a great effort, as a dad and a mate

Things taken for granted, not actually seen
No one knows, where his strong back has been

Sometimes the very best of care
Can see a you alone, just standing there

Wondering why, you no longer see
A single member, of your family
 

Back
Top