vote funny? yah or nay?

P

paxtonstafford

New Member
Location
midwest
[FONT=&quot]Two funniest jokes I ever heard in all me life and I am old….[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Pedestrian and dog waiting for the light to change so they could cross the street…second guy walks up still waiting for the light to change…says to the first guy “does your dog bite? First guy says “no”- second guy reaches down and pets the dog, the dog snarls and bites the hell out the guys hand…the guy with the mangled and bleeding hand …demands from the first guy…” I thought you said your dog didn’t bite”—first guy says “Not my dog”[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Frumpy mature women walks into a bar with a duck under her arm …bartender quickly says to the woman “get that pig out of here” the woman says “that’s not a pig its a duck”- bartender says “ I was talking to the duck”[/FONT]
 
paxtonstafford said:
Two funniest jokes I ever heard in all me life and I am old….


Pedestrian and dog waiting for the light to change so they could cross the street…second guy walks up still waiting for the light to change…says to the first guy “does your dog bite? First guy says “no”- second guy reaches down and pets the dog, the dog snarls and bites the hell out the guys hand…the guy with the mangled and bleeding hand …demands from the first guy…” I thought you said your dog didn’t bite”—first guy says “Not my dog”


Frumpy mature women walks into a bar with a duck under her arm …bartender quickly says to the woman “get that pig out of here” the woman says “that’s not a pig its a duck”- bartender says “ I was talking to the duck”
Click to expand...


223573kltf6qjwuh.gif
 
paraprosdokian humor is most always good

those are two very good ones, a bit ancient, but the old good ones remain funny no matter how many times they go around

great selection

Here's my current fav;

A guy goes to the supermarket, and a beautiful woman smiles at him and says hello.
He's rather taken aback because he can't place how he knows her.
So he asks, "Do you know me?" The woman says, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."
His mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife,
and he says, "My God! Are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table
with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery!?"
She looks into his eyes and calmly says, "No, I'm your son's math teacher."
 
In ancient Greece the city/states of Athens and Sparta loathed each other.

Two engaged ladies meet at the well on outskirts of Athens:

Lady from Athens: " My dowry includes half of an estate, 400 drachmas and a hundred acres. What could a woman from Sparta possibly
offer as her dowry?"

The lady from Sparta, "Chastity"
 
Mike4lorie
You got me again. I don't get it:, the alligator/crock, the towel draped on Super Angry. I know brainy when it is staring me in the face.
Double RR (RadisihRose) give you stamp of approval; her head ain't filled with nothing but brains.

I guess I'm stuck in one of my-'He'slow." stages.
You have any word play using homonym, laying around

I will use your 'you can see me,' just as soon as I work up my courage
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top