What is your opinion of this quote about adultery?

Better to leave this mans wife alone.......

You Rascal You (Louis Armstrong)​

Now I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you, uh-huh
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you, oh yeah
Well, I let you into my home; you gonna leave my woman alone
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you

Now I'll be glad when you die, you rascal, you, uh-huh
I'll be glad, oh, I'll be tickled to death when you leave this earth--it's true, oh yeah
When you're lyin' down six feet deep, no more fried chicken will you eat
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you, oh yeah

Ah, you just ain't no good, oh, you dog

Now listen here: I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you, uh-huh
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you, oh yeah
I'll be standin' on the corner high when they drag your body by
I'll be glad when you're dead; you know I'm gonna be so happy when you're gone, you dog
I'll be glad when you're dead, you rascal, you

 

Infidelity——I have some very sad stories about this topic. For some men and women, the pain never goes away. For others, it’s accepted into their “open marriage.”

A very good friend of mine is still dealing with infidelity many years later. I know it has been over 10 years since he found out about his wife’s indiscretions and today, he is still in emotional pain, even though they are divorced. He is in counseling, but it seems to have little effect. I have spent hours speaking with him about this, but he still suffers and it pains me to see my friend in such a way.
 
Gaer said:
This is a quote from an English play called"The Relapse" by Sir John Vanbrugh.

"No man worth having is true to his wife or can be true or ever was or will ever be so."

Please don't associate me with this quote. I'm just asking.
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Utter and complete nonsense. Sounds like one of those "clever" quotes made up by Oscar Wilde in an attempt to sound clever.

I'm assuming that being "true" refers to his actual behavior, not random thoughts he may have. If you consider a momentary flash of temptation, which is not acted on, as being "untrue," then maybe. But I have a feeling it refers to a lot more than that.
 
Nozzle36 said:
That Play was from the 1600's, I believe, where it was pretty much a given that men will be unfaithful
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I'm not entirely sure all men were faithless in the uncertain times pertaining four hundred years ago, not least because the strength of the bond with the mother of his children had such enormous implications for the survival of those children, if their parents did not pull together. :) .
 
Nozzle36 said:
The situation culturally was very different for women at that time. It was different for children also.
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I have no argument there, and of course fear of getting pregnant outside wedlock extended very much into my mothers generation, plus other considerations, but four hundred years ago I think it may be incorrect to assume there were not very strong bonds between parents so many generations ago. :) .
 
Nozzle36 said:
The situation culturally was very different for women at that time. It was different for children also.
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True. If you go back far enough, in Biblical days, polygamy was perfectly accepted as being the norm. So, if a man took a second wife, was he being "untrue" to the first one?
 
I saw a video of a bride just married and a few minutes after saying "I do" she was outside the church up against the wall with another wedding party man doing that thing. Amazing.
 
Sunny said:
True. If you go back far enough, in Biblical days, polygamy was perfectly accepted as being the norm. So, if a man took a second wife, was he being "untrue" to the first one?
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Yes. She would have been stoned if she took a second husband. Double standard and the fact that something was the norm and supposedly supported by a deity, doesn't make it right. It was a rule made by and for men.
 
Gaer said:
This is a quote from an English play called"The Relapse" by Sir John Vanbrugh.

"No man worth having is true to his wife or can be true or ever was or will ever be so."

Please don't associate me with this quote. I'm just asking.
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Would the same be said of a woman...she wouldn't be worth having if she was true to her husband? Double standards suck. And infidelity spreads VD.
 
Phoenix said:
Yes. She would have been stoned if she took a second husband. Double standard and the fact that something was the norm and supposedly supported by a deity, doesn't make it right. It was a rule made by and for men.
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I can see why you're saying that obviously, and very severe rules were in place in many parts of the world a few hundred years ago, and still are in some places, (would you believe a man whose wife was having an adulterous affair in "middle ages" Britain would be paraded around his village or town and pilloried for the behaviour of his wife, so strong was the feeling against that kind of thing?).

The other thing to try to bear in mind is the harshness of living conditions, pre modern medicines, etc., etc., etc., where death rates in childbirth were very high, mere survival for both the man and the woman was very uncertain, (upset the king or local landlord, and your life wasn't worth much), plus some areas of the world had much tougher living conditions than in Europe, so rules were strict, sexist certainly, but the choices were not great for all concerned too. Hard to judge therefore by modern standards is the point I'm trying to make. :)
 
grahamg said:
I can see why you're saying that obviously, and very severe rules were in place in many parts of the world a few hundred years ago, and still are in some places, (would you believe a man whose wife was having an adulterous affair in "middle ages" Britain would be paraded around his village or town and pilloried for the behaviour of his wife, so strong was the feeling against that kind of thing?).

The other thing to try to bear in mind is the harshness of living conditions, pre modern medicines, etc., etc., etc., where death rates in childbirth were very high, mere survival for both the man and the woman was very uncertain, (upset the king or local landlord, and your life wasn't worth much), plus some areas of the world had much tougher living conditions than in Europe, so rules were strict, sexist certainly, but the choices were not great for all concerned too. Hard to judge therefore by modern standards is the point I'm trying to make. :)
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Understood. At least these days there is good birth control. Of course, if the guy was fooling around, he had to be doing it with someone. Now, true, I'm sure there were gay guys then, but a lot of guys fooled around with women. I'm just saying that the double standard is absurd. Remember the book The Scarlet Letter. I'm not judging them per se. I had a period in my life where I fooled around. There were reasons I did it, and it was not because I wanted sex. It was because I was drowning and needed to be held. I've shared some of this on this site before. Sex for some is just sex. For some it is sacred. For some it involves oneness with another.
 
raybar said:
The quotation is from Act III of "The Relapse: or, Virtue in Danger: A Comedy" and is spoken by the widow Berinthia to Amanda, whose husband has been unfaithful.

Here's the passage:

Berinthia: What in the Name of Jove's the matter with you?

Amanda: The matter, Berinthia! I'm almost mad, I'm plagu'd to death.

Berinthia: Who is it that plagues you?

Amanda: Who do you think shou'd plague a Wife, but her Husband?

Berinthia: O ho, is it come to that? We shall have you wish yourself a Widow by and by.

Amanda: Wou'd I were any thing but what I am! A base ungrateful Man, after what I have done for him, to use me thus!

Berinthia: What, he has been ogling now, I'll warrant you?

Amanad: Yes, he has been ogling.

Berinthia: And so you are jealous? Is that all?

Amanda: That all! Is jealousy then nothing?

Berinthia: It shou'd be nothing, if I were in your Case.

Amanda: Why, what wou'd you do?

Berinthia: I'd cure myself.

Amanda: How?

Berinthia: Let Blood in the fond Vein: Care as little for my Husband as he did for me.

Amanda: That would not stop his Course.

Berinthia: Nor nothing else, when the Wind's in the warm Corner. Look you, Amanda, you may build Castles in the Air, and fume, and fret, and grow thin and lean, and pale and ugly, if you please. But I tell you, no Man worth having is true to his Wife, or can be true to his Wife, or ever was, or ever will be so.
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What she is saying here as far as I can tell, it that even good men are not true to their wives and never will be, so stop fretting and get on with it.
 
It's only a play and nothing more. Some men will never be faithful and that is a fact. Otherwise good husbands and fathers have strayed in the past and will continue. Not all men are cut from the same cloth and if we are lucky we get the faithful ones.
 
Lewkat said:
It's only a play and nothing more. Some men will never be faithful and that is a fact. Otherwise good husbands and fathers have strayed in the past and will continue. Not all men are cut from the same cloth and if we are lucky we get the faithful ones.
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A person does not need a spouse.
 
I've had three husbands. The first two were unfaithful. The current one is faithful. I know for certain because I'm with him all day every day and have been for thirty years. There are all kinds of ways to handle a relationship. No one actually owns anyone else, even if they think they do.
 

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