What is your opinion of this quote about adultery?

Gaer

Gaer

"Angel whisperer"
Location
New Mexico U.S.A.
This is a quote from an English play called"The Relapse" by Sir John Vanbrugh.

"No man worth having is true to his wife or can be true or ever was or will ever be so."

Please don't associate me with this quote. I'm just asking.
 

Last edited:
I have had a husband who had an affair on me, and I went on and married again. He was worth loving, he was faithful, and great! I am married again, my latter husband passed away, and again I am happily married and he is and always will be true to me and our marriage. I have always been true to my side of the vows. I know how it feels when you are betrayed.
 

I don’t know about the saying, but honestly, infidelity has literally killed many women and men.

We had a case where the norm happened. The man comes home from work early, finds his wife and her boyfriend cleaning up from their little rendezvous, her husband goes into his den, grabs the shotgun and kills them both.

We go to court because he was charged with 2 counts of felony homicide. He pleads not guilty and uses the defense “heat of the moment.” And, you know what, it works and he’s found not guilty.
 
Gaer said:
This is a quote from an English play called"The Relapse" by Sir John Vanbrugh.

"No man worth having is true to his wife or can be true or ever was or will ever be so."

This man talks total bulls**t and gives decent men the world over a bad name, he is obviously referring to and is obsessed with........ himself.
He deserves to be toe ended up his a*ce, and I'd gladly do it.
Click to expand...
 
Gaer said:
This is a quote from an English play called"The Relapse" by Sir John Vanbrugh.

"No man worth having is true to his wife or can be true or ever was or will ever be so."

Please don't associate me with this quote. I'm just asking.
Click to expand...

So, I take it the quote was from the lines of one of the characters...was this the central theme of the play? In what context was the statement made?

Said by male or female?
 
911 said:
I don’t know about the saying, but honestly, infidelity has literally killed many women and men.

We had a case where the norm happened. The man comes home from work early, finds his wife and her boyfriend cleaning up from their little rendezvous, her husband goes into his den, grabs the shotgun and kills them both.

We go to court because he was charged with 2 counts of felony homicide. He pleads not guilty and uses the defense “heat of the moment.” And, you know what, it works and he’s found not guilty.
Click to expand...
I was trying to think of the correct name of the defense and now, it comes to me. It’s called the “Sudden Passion” defense.
 
The quotation is from Act III of "The Relapse: or, Virtue in Danger: A Comedy" and is spoken by the widow Berinthia to Amanda, whose husband has been unfaithful.

Here's the passage:

Berinthia: What in the Name of Jove's the matter with you?

Amanda: The matter, Berinthia! I'm almost mad, I'm plagu'd to death.

Berinthia: Who is it that plagues you?

Amanda: Who do you think shou'd plague a Wife, but her Husband?

Berinthia: O ho, is it come to that? We shall have you wish yourself a Widow by and by.

Amanda: Wou'd I were any thing but what I am! A base ungrateful Man, after what I have done for him, to use me thus!

Berinthia: What, he has been ogling now, I'll warrant you?

Amanad: Yes, he has been ogling.

Berinthia: And so you are jealous? Is that all?

Amanda: That all! Is jealousy then nothing?

Berinthia: It shou'd be nothing, if I were in your Case.

Amanda: Why, what wou'd you do?

Berinthia: I'd cure myself.

Amanda: How?

Berinthia: Let Blood in the fond Vein: Care as little for my Husband as he did for me.

Amanda: That would not stop his Course.

Berinthia: Nor nothing else, when the Wind's in the warm Corner. Look you, Amanda, you may build Castles in the Air, and fume, and fret, and grow thin and lean, and pale and ugly, if you please. But I tell you, no Man worth having is true to his Wife, or can be true to his Wife, or ever was, or ever will be so.
 
911 said:
I don’t know about the saying, but honestly, infidelity has literally killed many women and men.

We had a case where the norm happened. The man comes home from work early, finds his wife and her boyfriend cleaning up from their little rendezvous, her husband goes into his den, grabs the shotgun and kills them both.

We go to court because he was charged with 2 counts of felony homicide. He pleads not guilty and uses the defense “heat of the moment.” And, you know what, it works and he’s found not guilty.
Click to expand...
I doubt he was found not guilty of anything. He was probably found guilty of 2nd degree murder or manslaughter, which are lessor convictions.
 
Gaer said:
This is a quote from an English play called"The Relapse" by Sir John Vanbrugh.

"No man worth having is true to his wife or can be true or ever was or will ever be so."

Please don't associate me with this quote. I'm just asking.
Click to expand...
There are two types of people who might think that quote is true:
1. A man who is unfaithful & is trying to justify it with the nonsensical "Everybody does it."
2. A woman who makes bad choices in sleazy men & blames them, instead of blaming herself. Much easier than admitting they make stupid choices. Such women are easy to recognize. They don't say, "My husband ," or "My boyfriend ," or "My fiancee was unfaithful." They say "Men are unfaithful."
 
Last edited:
Maybe the speaker in that quote sees men who are true to their wives as being boring?
I pose this as a question because that is how I read it, but it may not be a correct interpretation.

In any case, why bother to make the marriage vows if we don't really mean it?

Edit: If a person makes a solemn vow and does not keep it, how good is that person's word after that?

Tony
 
tbeltrans said:
Maybe the speaker in that quote sees men who are true to their wives as being boring?
I pose this as a question because that is how I read it, but it may not be a correct interpretation.

In any case, why bother to make the marriage vows if we don't really mean it?

Edit: If a person makes a solemn vow and does not keep it, how good is that person's word after that?

Tony
Click to expand...
Exactly what I always tell men and women who've been cheated on, then "Forgive."
Personally, I only required ONE lie, then we're done (as I said to my ex wife).
 
There is a book about marriage written by a man called Eustace Chesser, probably thirty or so years ago, (I picked it up in a charity shop).

He put forward a view similar to the one in the OP way back then, so if you want to read arguments in favour there is one place to look.

I'm against but then again I'm old fashioned in so many ways. :whistle: .
 
Sounds to me like Sir John Vanbrugh is excusing his own and his fellow men's infidelity. Some men and women can and do stay faithful to the ones they are committed to.

Something I've noticed about fidelity~ men who have fathers and grandfathers who don't stray outside of marriage seem more inclined to stay faithful to their partner.

Many men who are womanizers have fathers and friends who do the same. This is expected by the other men they come in contact with, even if it surprises the women in their lives.
 
It's interesting how words, innocent on their own, but put together a certain way, evoke emotional response.
The power of thoughts and words becomes mesmerizing to me.
This thread to me is more about the impact of words.
This was written in 1696, but how much does it pertain to today?

Are men who attract the opposite sex more chrismatic, more charming?
Men who cheat: Are they giving off some chemical or electrical attraction others don't possess?
Is marriage a man made rite, when you consider the varied cultures of the world; harems, plural marriages?
Is a sin against your marital partner a sin against God?
Is cheating always from the lower mind functions or are there instances when it's acceptable?

Adultery for excitement is not right action.
Hurting any other soul is not right action.
Faultering on a solemn vow is not right action, and as the consciousness evolves and merges with God,
thought and performance of any act will be in complete harmony with all life.

I'm taking no stand here as I understand both sides of the questions and both sides of the emotions.
Just thinking and wondering.
Again I must add, IMO!
 
Last edited:
I don't believe infidelity is a total male thing. Women seem quite able and willing , also. Marriages last a long time, and our emotions don't. They are fickle, They are as permanent as a summer breeze. It's not that we are inherently bad, It's that we are always growing and changing. We are not the same at 18 as we are at 38, nor at 58. The best we can hope for is that we age and change ,as the same as our partner.
 
911 said:
I don’t know about the saying, but honestly, infidelity has literally killed many women and men.

We had a case where the norm happened. The man comes home from work early, finds his wife and her boyfriend cleaning up from their little rendezvous, her husband goes into his den, grabs the shotgun and kills them both.

We go to court because he was charged with 2 counts of felony homicide. He pleads not guilty and uses the defense “heat of the moment.” And, you know what, it works and he’s found not guilty.
Click to expand...
Wow! So, it looks like it depends on the judge, because "in the heat of the moment" leaves room for possible more deadly, violent things if temper gets in the way!
 
 

Last edited:

Back
Top