Moving to a homeless shelter today

D

Denise1952

Well-known Member
and I'm long past worrying about what other, folks think of me. My sister and I are toxic for each other, and her kids have blamed me for the uncomfortable living situation. That doesn't surprise me, I've always been "odd man out" in this family (well, woman). I want to share this stuff because I don't have that many folks around here I know. SF has been a lifesaver for me many times over the last year.

For those that don't know, I am very, low income. Most of that is my fault, some of it was not. This is just how my life is turning out. I take care of myself as best I can, with the help of foodstamps from the government, and the State has provided health insurance for me. Then I finally got my SS retirement at age 62. It's still hard for me to admit that so I guess I'm not totally free of what others think of me.

So, for those that think I am a Republican, or democrat, lol, I'm not either, but I do not want the help I'm getting to go away. I battle with accepting it, feeling less than, or someone one else footing the bill. I also don't like the name calling of people who disagree on something, so then I suppose I'm automatically put on the "other" team.

I am waiting for housing, in a nice little town, and that housing is much more than I ever dreamed to have on my small income. I am grateful to the powers that be, and a good friend that helped me find it and get signed up. I may have as long as a year more to wait but the shelter I've found is very decent. I can live there and still save my money for the move. I will be amongst all sorts of other women with problems, some like mine, some much, much worse. I get to have internet I think, so will stay in touch.

I have an inexpensive storage to move my things to today. Very close so I can go there and check on it easily. I feel a sense of relief, more than fear. I also have my new home to look forward to. When I get the call, All I'll have to do is load my truck and head south;) Denise

PS ANY feedback welcome. Maybe some of you paying taxes will like knowing this woman appreciates the help and doesn't take advantage. You don't see garbage in my shopping cart, and I don't go to the doc unless it's apparent I need one.
 

Sorry it didn't work out for you at your sister's Denise, but from what you've shared in the past, I'm surprised it lasted as long as it did. Hope you can make the move to California sooner than later. It's good that there's a shelter nearby that you can go to temporarily, I know you're strong and you'll be okay...hugs. Don't worry about what others think, assistance is there for those who need it, nothing to apologize for at all. Wishing you the best, we're always here for you. :love_heart:
 
Thanks Seabreeze,

I was so surprised when I saw the shelter. I thought I knew where it was and what it looked like, but it is a pretty place with lots of windows, newer building. Looks like it may have been an office building (I'm sure it was) at one time. I like talking with the other ladies, sometimes I think I might even help them, only if they ask. I know they help me see the bigger picture, and even what is most important in life. I had to stay in a shelter once before, and it was a totally positive experience. I mean there were little irritations like learning to sleep in a room full of ladies, some that snore, like me, LOL!

It is comforting because you know you are not alone, and how good you have it too. Thanks and a huge hug SB;) denise
 

Denise, I'm sorry things didn't work out and I hope your housing is available quickly. I hope you can keep in touch with us here. I'd like to know how things are going with you. Big hugs! :)
 
Oh Denise, firstly I'm so sorry it hasn't worked out for you living with your sister you seemed so upbeat and happy when you went there, I hadn't realised you were having such a difficult time, but then you're so positive in your outlook that I guess it didn't come across on the forum that all wasn't a bed of roses., I really thought you were settled for the short term until you moved into the new place of your own.

I'm happy for you that you've managed to find accommodation where you feel your life may be a little more settled, but certainly although these shelters are often a life saver for many they do sometimes bring a whole new set of problems some of which you've touched on in your OP just so as you're aware..I'd hate for you to leap from the frying pan into the fire.. .

I personally know a lady who lives in just such a homeless shelter , they get to live there for a year, then they must move out, find their own place, I don't know if it's the same where you live.

Although it was a lifesaver for her after becoming homeless when she turned to alcohol after domestic abuse and finding herself homeless, she has found it a little bit of a trial having to share a room with up to 6 different transient women all with various personalities a and emotional baggage. Also some quite strict rules regarding the Homeless shelter itself with regard to visitors , bed times, etc..

Denise although we all live far away from you, you have to think of us like your own family who just happen to live far away, but are always here to support and give advice if you need it..or just here to listen whenever you need us...

Good luck chikadee, I wish you everything you wish for yourself..
 
I wish you the best Denise. This is the very reason I am a Democrat. I am proud that my party can see to it folks like you get a chance at a decent place to live, food to eat and medical help when needed. I get very offended at those who snub the less fortunate. I know this involves sacrifices for you but you seem the type to make friends and make do wherever you are. Thankfully you won't be exposed to the dangers of "car living". Good luck and chin up....
 
Ameriscot said:
Denise, I'm sorry things didn't work out and I hope your housing is available quickly. I hope you can keep in touch with us here. I'd like to know how things are going with you. Big hugs! :)
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Thanks AM, I will stay in touch. If there isn't a computer room or internet throughout the building, I can always go to the library;) Thanks for caring;) denise, big hugs for you too:)


hollydolly said:
Oh Denise, firstly I'm so sorry it hasn't worked out for you living with your sister you seemed so upbeat and happy when you went there, I hadn't realised you were having such a difficult time, but then you're so positive in your outlook that I guess it didn't come across on the forum that all wasn't a bed of roses., I really thought you were settled for the short term until you moved into the new place of your own.

I'm happy for you that you've managed to find accommodation where you feel your life may be a little more settled, but certainly although these shelters are often a life saver for many they do sometimes bring a whole new set of problems some of which you've touched on in your OP just so as you're aware..I'd hate for you to leap from the frying pan into the fire.. .

I personally know a lady who lives in just such a homeless shelter , they get to live there for a year, then they must move out, find their own place, I don't know if it's the same where you live.

Although it was a lifesaver for her after becoming homeless when she turned to alcohol after domestic abuse and finding herself homeless, she has found it a little bit of a trial having to share a room with up to 6 different transient women all with various personalities a and emotional baggage. Also some quite strict rules regarding the Homeless shelter itself with regard to visitors , bed times, etc..

Denise although we all live far away from you, you have to think of us like your own family who just happen to live far away, but are always here to support and give advice if you need it..or just here to listen whenever you need us...

Good luck chikadee, I wish you everything you wish for yourself..
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This shelter has rules, as it should be, and usually a task to complete each day, and a schedule. For me that is healthy;) and the tasks are simple. The hours are amazingly wonderful! I think up by 7 or so, and all meals are served in a clean, nice dining room. They have hired cooks/regulars and I'm sure the food is a lot of carbs, god help me, LOL!! Oink! Well, I'll have lots of places to walk, and we are right near "rich bitch" hill, so "uphill" for the butt and thighs, lol:)! I'll keep my stuff like camera etc. in storage though.

We have to be out and about between 9a.m and noon. Then we can stay in our beds (ick) or be out and about all day, or a sort of family gathering area. I think we have to be there at 5 to check in, eat if we want, and then can run around more until I think it's 9. Nothing unfair. They have to keep order. I think they decided to make it so if anyone needed to lie down in their own bed they could, they're fair I think, and compassionate. More will be revealed. I am grateful to have anything.

I am grateful for you guys, because we may not always agree, but when the chips are down, there's always a friend, or more than one here:thankyou:
 
Denise, I'm sorry things did not work out with your sister. I think you'll find you have more strength and courage than you realize. You certainly don't need to apologize for anything so don't even go there. Just remember, we're all here for you any time you need to talk or vent. Just hang in there and try to look at the bright side - like you always do. We'll be sending our positive thoughts your way, Denise.
:bighug:
 
Denise, I wish you well in the ordeal your facing. Sounds like you're being very brave and upbeat, but that's who you are. I imagine some of the other ladies in the shelter will benefit from knowing you and seeing how a classy lady operates. Certainly all of us here have been impressed with all you've contributed and all that you'll continue contributing.
 
AZ Jim said:
I wish you the best Denise. This is the very reason I am a Democrat. I am proud that my party can see to it folks like you get a chance at a decent place to live, food to eat and medical help when needed. I get very offended at those who snub the less fortunate. I know this involves sacrifices for you but you seem the type to make friends and make do wherever you are. Thankfully you won't be exposed to the dangers of "car living". Good luck and chin up....
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Thanks Jim:) I appreciate that note very much:) In my "previous" more fortunate life, lol, I wanted to keep giving even though the same things were said about some not deserving it. I honestly don't feel I deserve, like because I was born in the US so I am fortunate yes. I just feel very grateful that there are folks in this country that care enough to give donations, and fight to help the less fortunate. I mean, I don't know how or why they need food or shelter, but what's really important is they need it.
 
Wishing you the best Denise, one can never be too far above others to think to look down on anyone as not to find themselves in some way in need in one way or another. Hopefully, for you, your permanent digs will come through for you much sooner than later, in the mean time be well.
 
Hi Denise, thanks for letting us know your new situation. I was wondering how you were doing. I wish you the very very best. Sometimes, although everything looks the bleakest, it can only get better. I know your a strong person and you'll get through this with your positive attitude and determination. It might also be an opportunity to make new friends and connect with work prospects. Good luck and keep in touch.
 
Denise, you are a classy lady as Josiah said and I wish you all the best and hope you won't have
to wait too long for your own place.
We all find ourselves in need of understanding and help from others at some time in our lives.
I'll be thinking of you and please keep in touch when you can. Many hugs to you my friend.
 
Just came on the forum and saw this Denise....if things had got so bad with staying with your sister then this has to be better, as it will only hopefully be for the short term.We all hope that they find you a nice little place to call your own sooner rather than later, and hope that moving to the shelter may advance your claim for housing, rather than living with a relative?Meanwhile, wishing you the strength to get through it all, and hope for good times ahead. try and stay in touch with us all on here if you can.xxxx
 
I'm adding my hopes and wishes to the rest, Denise. It will be a blink of an eye before your next place is available, and I know you're strong enough to last until then.
 
Denise, don't say "homeless" in reference to yourself or the place you're moving to! You're merely in transition, and it's a transitional home for you and others. Homeless just carries a negative connotation, and we don't want you to start thinking negatively!

I bet you'll make friends there who'll be your friends for the rest of your life:) Good luck to you and here's hoping your apartment comes through sooner rather than later.


ETA: And one more thing: you DO deserve all the help that you get; you earned your way and paid your taxes. If it ever happens that you can pay it forward, we know you will.
 
Well life is about to get better than Denise! A time to take stock and begin the rejoicing!

My daughter was married for 10 years and for most of the last four years was always unhappy. They just weren't suited to each other but neither would take the first step. So they grew further apart and she got way more miserable.....until finally, she just couldn't stand the idea of waiting to get everything organized to leave, and she just told him she was done and was moving out. And within the space of one month she was gone. That was six to eight months ago and she says today, that even though sometimes she gets nervous because she is 'alone' and expenses are all up to her, she is still super happy that she left him. The relief of not being stuck in what was turning into an unpleasant relationship is so profound for her that she only wishes that she'd done it earlier.

So if your sister is like oil to your water, then it's time for you to go. Sometimes the only thing that can save a relationship (sister to sister, mother to daughter, etc.) is lots of distance. It's too bad when it gets to that point, but it is what it is right?

So your new life starts today and you'll be in the thoughts and prayers of everyone here!
 
nwlady said:
ANY feedback welcome. Maybe some of you paying taxes will like knowing this woman appreciates the help and doesn't take advantage. You don't see garbage in my shopping cart, and I don't go to the doc unless it's apparent I need one.
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Needs must, Denise. Never feel bad about having insufficient money. It's when we lack kindness and compassion that we are truly poor. You are rich in both of these qualities so hold your head up. Be proud of who you are.
 
I wish you well Denise as you relocate and hope you find happiness and contentment as well as good health.
 

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