Most difficult Decisions Made

I

imp

Senior Member
In looking back, what do you feel was the toughest decision you have ever had to make? imp
 

Thinking about your question ,I'd have to say when I left the city where I was born ( Broken Hill. NSW ) at age 25 .
 
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So many, so many...the toughest decision I ever had to make I wouldn't like to put out on an open forum!!


What's yours Imp. ?
 

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Sometimes I think I've steered too cautious a path through life. Toughest decisions..? Probably that has been to uproot and move with my family from one end of the country to the other (once each way). OK not such a big deal in the UK, but still it felt like the right thing to do and it worked out well. Some people my say I was lucky, but I say that I made good decisions.
 
Capt Lightning said:
Sometimes I think I've steered too cautious a path through life. Toughest decisions..? Probably that has been to uproot and move with my family from one end of the country to the other (once each way). OK not such a big deal in the UK, but still it felt like the right thing to do and it worked out well. Some people my say I was lucky, but I say that I made good decisions.
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To abide by, and feel one's decisions were acceptable and appropriate, places one in a position of long-term satisfaction! imp
 
Lon said:
For me it was deciding on a treatment option for my newly diagnosed Prostate Cancer.
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Most definitely a rough decision, Lon. How are you doing? Being a decade younger, I often wonder how long before......

imp
 
Lon said:
It's been 22 Years and I'm doing great. No re occurance since they got it all.
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Geez, I hope you did not think I was questioning your own longevity. Foot in my mouth, I meant how long before I, too, am faced with such a decision. Sorry if I was unclear. imp
 
Telling my middle daughter she couldn't live here anymore. A history of bulimia, cutting, passing funny money, lying about everything and thinking we were too dumb to know what she was up to. For the two siblings still at home and our own sanity. No just really it had been time years before actually. She became homeless, a suicide attempt that put her in hospital as a Jane Doe. I did the missing person's report...only I knew her scars, tattoos and birthmarks. She was in a coma for a week and then her oldest brother stepped up to bat.

I wish her the best, that's all I can say.
 
Hmmm - actually I'm trying to make that decision right now. Two grown married daughters - no grandkids yet. Oldest daughter moved to another state a few years ago and really, really wants me to move near her. Youngest daughter doesn't want me to move. Sigh.
 
ib1818, I'm in the same situation. I decided a) live wherever I'd be happiest or b) live wherever the first grandchild is born, IF a grandchild is born or c) live wherever I'm most needed by family. I chose C because my mother might need me soon. My sister can step in if a grandchild is born if I'm needed there more.
 
imp said:
Geez, I hope you did not think I was questioning your own longevity. Foot in my mouth, I meant how long before I, too, am faced with such a decision. Sorry if I was unclear. imp
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No problem Imp & hopefully, you will never have to be faced with a similar decision.
 
Oh fur, gosh I completely understand.
I would say similar for myself. After a horrible ball busting, drag em out, dirty divorce my oldest daughter (age 17 at the time) took a turn for the worse. She started to physically abuse her younger sister and myself. It got so bad I kicked her out. I could not take her abuse any more. Fortunately we have made amends and she is back to being the lovely, beautiful, kind hearted young woman I know I raised. She has been told she can never live with me again. She has no relationship with her sister sadly as they keep each other at arms length. Her life path after leaving has been rocky but she has managed to find her own happiness, she is safe, and I am happy for her. I miss her dreadfully and we have a mutual agreement that we know we are there for each other.
 
An excellent and thought provoking question. It's hard to pinpoint one as being the most difficult, but in thinking back, one that I and my wife wrestled with was whether to have a 2nd child. We went back and forth and in the end agreed to stop at one. There are still times when I question whether or not we made the right choice. A few years later we made the decision final with a visit to my doctor (and yes, that was a tough decision too). Looking forward, I have a very tough decision coming up in that we have to decide where to move, when to move, if moving is the right option, etc. We've only been in one house and have lived in the same state since we married.
 
Knowing where to live is a tricky one. Some years ago when I was still living in England, I discovered that a man I had worked with in another country, lived a few streets away. He and his wife had moved there to be near their daughter, but after a while, her husband got a new job and they moved away. This left them growing old and with few friends in what to them was a foreign land (they were Dutch).

So, our decision on that one was to move to where suited us. Our daughters live in the Midlands (central England), but that's only 1 hour on a plane or 8 hours drive.
 
I had a similar challenge. My mother was 91 years of age and suffering from dementia. She suddenly refused food and drink and I had to write down instructions to the nursing staff that she should not be subjected to any form of forced feeding or any medical procedure designed to prolong her life. I instructed then to offer food and drink but she continued to refuse. She died a week later and had excellent palliative care during that time. It was hard but I have no regrets about putting my signature on that paper.
 
25 years ago I was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer and was newly married. The tough decision for me was which of the many treatments to,go with since all options had significant consequences.
 
I was aware that their was no quality of life,he had metastized brain cancer that had began in his lung...it was just a very difficult time and I remember vividly feeling like I was giving permission to kill him.
 
Having to tell my mom what my incredible stepdad requested if he ever had a severe stroke or had to be on life support. He told me to get the paperwork out of his safe regarding his do-not-resuscitate orders, knowing that my mom would never give them to his doctor. Loving and respecting them both, it was the toughest decision of my life and still troubles me to have been placed in that position. What would y'all have done?
 
I had to make a decision many years ago whether to confront my much older brother on the disrespect he showed to my parents , me and my sister. I decided not to and just tried in every other way to bring him back into the family. I continued to respect him and tried to keep in touch with him. Sadly he passed away two years ago and left everything in his will to his daughter and cut out his 2 sons. I regret not telling him everything I wanted to tell him and wonder if he would have been kinder to his 2 sons and their families.
 
To hang up my car keys. But it was time and I knew it. I moved to be a close neighbor to my youngest and so far it's OK. Still miss the freedom but sometimes circumstances demand change.
 

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