Answer a Question with a Question...

That's what I like about Kiva - you choose which tiny business you'll support with a $25 loan and get repaid. Don't you find that personal connections tend to make you want to support a particular charity?
 

Not for pay, but did various years-long volunteer stints.

Do you find that once you volunteer for an organization it's very difficult to extricate yourself from that situation?
 

Yes, because I've had difficulty leaving a couple of volunteer organizations. Stayed way longer in the (non-paying) jobs than I'd intended because I felt so guilty trying to leave.

The result is I'm very unwilling to volunteer for ongoing jobs. One-offs like organizing a dinner are fine, but long term committee responsibilities? No thanks.

Haven't you had that happen to you?
 
It is. It's also surprising how quickly they develop the mindset of "OK, that slot is filled, no need to worry about that again." with the assumption that you'll continue on it forever.

I admit to also having been guilty of relying long-term on someone else's kindnesses.

Do you suppose that's why I felt like I was "bailing" on others in the organizations when various volunteers job had long stopped bringing me meaning, but I felt too guilty to hand in notice?
 
More so as I get older. I used to be much more of a "screw you and the horse you rode in on" person. Raising children and years under my belt have mellowed me.

Have you mellowed with time?
 
And in addition, have you found that some things you volunteered for,
it was expected or seemed important for you to be the one to find a replacement volunteer, for that task, at whatever point you discontinue doing it?
 
Absolutely. I remind myself often that I don't have to attend every argument to which I'm invited. Also that despite some people being mean and scary, unlike lions there's no danger that they'll eat me!
 
Do you think the current situation ie. Lockdown...is making people more short-tempered, and liable to have arguments just to relieve stress?
 
I do..in real life it seems people are far more aggravated and argumentative.. have you found yourself in an argument at all with a stranger during this period in history
 
I did shout at one of my neighbours, which is very rare for me...but I think I was justified. Have you ever moved house because you didn't get on with your neighbours?
 
Have you ever attempted to meet potential future neighbors, before making a final decision
on renting or buying or moving to a specific home?
 
We just moved about 2 yrs ago and honestly, I haven't met any of my new neighbors. My husband has and said they are really nice. I really don't want to get to know the new ones from the lessons I learned from where we lived before. When we lived there I was the person they came to when they needed anything. I was used and I won't let that happen again.
 

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