Getting old has no benefits.

Mitch86

Mitch86

Member
Location
Connecticut, USA
The older I get, the more things I cannot do. My neck is bent over and I can barely operate a PC or watch TV. I have totally forgotten how my TV remotes work. I'll call the TV company for that. Walking is getting difficult. Soon I will need a wheel chair. Everyone I once knew is no DEAD. Even family doesn't to talk to me or visit me since it is too depressing for them. My wife is still alive so we can talk to each other. If she dies, I will be all alone and may end up in a nursing home.
 

Mitch86 said:
The older I get, the more things I cannot do. My neck is bent over and I can barely operate a PC or watch TV. I have totally forgotten how my TV remotes work. I'll call the TV company for that. Walking is getting difficult. Soon I will need a wheel chair. Everyone I once knew is no DEAD. Even family doesn't to talk to me or visit me since it is too depressing for them. My wife is still alive so we can talk to each other. If she dies, I will be all alone and may end up in a nursing home.
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Mitch, I mentioned this before to you... I feel that because you're in such pain, it's causing you understandable depression, I wonder if it's possible for you to speak to your doctor about it..
 

Mitch86 said:
The older I get, the more things I cannot do. My neck is bent over and I can barely operate a PC or watch TV. I have totally forgotten how my TV remotes work. I'll call the TV company for that. Walking is getting difficult. Soon I will need a wheel chair. Everyone I once knew is no DEAD. Even family doesn't to talk to me or visit me since it is too depressing for them. My wife is still alive so we can talk to each other. If she dies, I will be all alone and may end up in a nursing home.
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Mitch, my mom didn't want to go into a nursing home, but when it ultimately became a necessity, we found a lovely one. She liked it! It took a couple of weeks, but once she got over the fact that she couldn't live with any of us kids anymore, she relaxed and made friends and started going to enjoy the weekly live entertainment, Bingo Night and other activities. She even got back to doing arts and crafts. So, there are benefits to living in a decent nursing home.

But you're not there yet, and maybe you'll never have to be. I know you appreciate each day for what it is right now, and I know it isn't easy but try to think of the things you CAN do and not the things you can't. You are company for your wife, that's one thing. Can you garden? Or even just grow a tomato plant or something (indoors or out)? Can you think of other such things that you can do, big or small?

I sure wish you all the best, Mitch.
 
While i can understand your feelings given your health issues, and i don't relish all the physical changes i'm dealing with myself, i tend to think that like so many other things it varies with individuals. I seem to recall you have home health visits. If so you really should take @hollydolly's advice and talk with a provider about your state of mind. Or talk with your provider at next office appt. Because nothing speeds up one's decline faster than feeling so unhappy in one's life.

Some things i see as benefits of aging:
Because i no longer have to answer to employer only my energy levels and the weather dictate what i do and when. And i have more time to engage in things that enhance my quality of life.

The older i get the less i've cared what random people think of me, as long as they don't actually interfere with how i live, they can think whatever they like.

For women, it is often a downside that aging makes us almost invisible to many people. But being a person who values solitude, that's kind of a plus for me. Besides i know how to assert myself when necessary.

Do you and your wife talk about this feeling of yours? Does she share similar feelings? If so, she should talk with a professional too.
 
feywon said:
While i can understand your feelings given your health issues, and i don't relish all the physical changes i'm dealing with myself, i tend to think that like so many other things it varies with individuals. I seem to recall you have home health visits. If so you really should take @hollydolly's advice and talk with a provider about your state of mind. Or talk with your provider at next office appt. Because nothing speeds up one's decline faster than feeling so unhappy in one's life.

Some things i see as benefits of aging:
Because i no longer have to answer to employer only my energy levels and the weather dictate what i do and when. And i have more time to engage in things that enhance my quality of life.

The older i get the less i've cared what random people think of me, as long as they don't actually interfere with how i live, they can think whatever they like.

For women, it is often a downside that aging makes us almost invisible to many people. But being a person who values solitude, that's kind of a plus for me. Besides i know how to assert myself when necessary.

Do you and your wife talk about this feeling of yours? Does she share similar feelings? If so, she should talk with a professional too.
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Funny that you and others brought up a "professional." My brother had a psychiatrist and died in his office 2 years ago. He had cancer, heart disease and COVID19. In the end no one really knew what killed him. He was 83. Personally, I think "professionals" like psychiatrists and psychologists push only BS. They are a total waste of time. They can NOT heal any illnesses we have. They are the modern equivalent of the witch doctors in Africa. The mind cannot reverse the decline and illnesses of aging all of which end in DEATH. Personally, I don't believe in any "gods," heaven or hell. I only believe in one real Master of the Universe, DEATH! Father Death rescues all of us at the end from pain and suffering by causing us to cease living upon which time all our problems are solved. In the meantime I live each day as if it was my last enjoying my PC and all the game programs and other internet locations and just have FUN until Father Death claims me.
 
Mitch86 said:
Funny that you and others brought up a "professional." My brother had a psychiatrist and died in his office 2 years ago. He had cancer, heart disease and COVID19. In the end no one really knew what killed him. He was 83. Personally, I think "professionals" like psychiatrists and psychologists push only BS. They are a total waste of time. They can NOT heal any illnesses we have. They are the modern equivalent of the witch doctors in Africa. The mind cannot reverse the decline and illnesses of aging all of which end in DEATH. Personally, I don't believe in any "gods," heaven or hell. I only believe in one real Master of the Universe, DEATH! Father Death rescues all of us at the end from pain and suffering by causing us to cease living upon which time all our problems are solved. In the meantime I live each day as if it was my last enjoying my PC and all the game programs and other internet locations and just have FUN until Father Death claims me.
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You have a reality-based mindset. So do I. :giggle:
 
Without professionals we would know what is wrong with ourselves or seek professional help to tell us how to live. A true professional will always tell you what is wrong and seldom focus on what you are doing right. if professionals diagnosed you as happy and well rounded individuals you would hesitate continuing treatment.
it is best we submit to poor health and mental disjunction to maintain and support the professional integrity of people who diagnose what is wrong.
 
Mr. Ed said:
Without professionals we would know what is wrong with ourselves or seek professional help to tell us how to live. A true professional will always tell you what is wrong and seldom focus on what you are doing right. if professionals diagnosed you as happy and well rounded individuals you would hesitate continuing treatment.
it is best we submit to poor health and mental disjunction to maintain and support the professional integrity of people who diagnose what is wrong.
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Sorry can't agree, while i've known some professionals, both medical mental health ones with too narrow of views and pet theories they tend to blame for problems or credit with 'cures'. I'm a proactive patient and won't tolerate it. Even when i have blood work done i want a copy of the the results.

Nor is it any professional's place to tell anyone how to live rather it is their job to help us see what options we have and the possible (rarely 100% predictable) outcomes for varous choices we make.
 
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Mitch86 said:
Funny that you and others brought up a "professional." My brother had a psychiatrist and died in his office 2 years ago. He had cancer, heart disease and COVID19. In the end no one really knew what killed him. He was 83. Personally, I think "professionals" like psychiatrists and psychologists push only BS. They are a total waste of time. They can NOT heal any illnesses we have. They are the modern equivalent of the witch doctors in Africa. The mind cannot reverse the decline and illnesses of aging all of which end in DEATH. Personally, I don't believe in any "gods," heaven or hell. I only believe in one real Master of the Universe, DEATH! Father Death rescues all of us at the end from pain and suffering by causing us to cease living upon which time all our problems are solved. In the meantime I live each day as if it was my last enjoying my PC and all the game programs and other internet locations and just have FUN until Father Death claims me.
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Well, forgive me for responding with a suggestion and for expressing my view on aging.
Thing is you rarely sound like you are having any fun at all.
I won't bother you anymore. Wish you the best!
 
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"Aging" can be a real challenge. I've watched several of my old friends.....most of which are now gone....suffer various ailments that made their latter years a real hassle. I've got some arthritis issues, and my old teeth are slowly falling apart, but I try to make the best of it, and find something worthwhile to occupy my days. Age eventually catches up with all of us, but trying to keep a positive attitude, and not getting stressed out over every little "setback" is perhaps the best approach.
 
feywon said:
Sorry can't agree, while i've known some professionals, both medical mental health ones with too narrow a veiws and pet theoriesthey tend to blame for problems or credit with 'cures'. I'm a proactive patient and won't tolerate it. Even when i have blood work done i want a copy of the the results.

Nor is it any professional's place to tell anyone how to live rather it is their job to help us see what options we have and the possible (rarely 100% predictable) outcomes for varous choices we make.
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I agree with you 100%
 
Mitch86 said:
Funny that you and others brought up a "professional." My brother had a psychiatrist and died in his office 2 years ago. He had cancer, heart disease and COVID19. In the end no one really knew what killed him. He was 83. Personally, I think "professionals" like psychiatrists and psychologists push only BS. They are a total waste of time. They can NOT heal any illnesses we have. They are the modern equivalent of the witch doctors in Africa. The mind cannot reverse the decline and illnesses of aging all of which end in DEATH. Personally, I don't believe in any "gods," heaven or hell. I only believe in one real Master of the Universe, DEATH! Father Death rescues all of us at the end from pain and suffering by causing us to cease living upon which time all our problems are solved. In the meantime I live each day as if it was my last enjoying my PC and all the game programs and other internet locations and just have FUN until Father Death claims me.
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Thank you for that positive note...at the end :LOL:
 
Perspective is everything. Getting old almost always ensures a shorter mortality.
Getting old lends new meaning to the phrase "pain in the butt".
Enhanced appreciation for the little things that were once easy, but now difficult.
Appreciation for bowel movements used to be so easy.
Don't have to obey parents, their dead.
Kids grown up don't have to take them to school.
I can eat and stay up as long as I want.
I have no boss but I aim to please
These are a few benefits of old age
 
Mr. Ed said:
Perspective is everything. Getting old almost always ensures a shorter mortality.
Getting old lends new meaning to the phrase "pain in the butt".
Enhanced appreciation for the little things that were once easy, but now difficult.
Appreciation for bowel movements used to be so easy.
Don't have to obey parents, their dead.
Kids grown up don't have to take them to school.
I can eat and stay up as long as I want.
I have no boss but I aim to please
These are a few benefits of old age
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I didn't obey my parents when they were here.
 
I am so sorry for all your pain. You obviously are feeling a lot, inside and out. You are not alone, a lot of us are suffering along with you, believe me. How wonderful that you still have your wife. Being alone going thru your type struggles is very difficult, and a place that some of us find ourselves in already. But you still have a will to live or you would probably be dead. Try to muster up some positivity. It really does have healing powers, and helps get you through difficult times.
 
Mitch86 said:
I have totally forgotten how my TV remotes work.
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I wonder if they make TVs that have Siri/Alexa that we could just tell them out loud to turn on/off and change channel? I remember when my father was old one time I came in to find him watching static on the TV because he couldn't work the remote. I felt really sad about it.
 
I’m very impressed with the 80 something’s on here that navigate the internet so well. A lot are more tech savvy than myself at age 60. I have no idea how to fully use this site or download and share images, etc. I have a tv I don’t use because I don’t want to read the instructions to a universal remote so that I can program it.
 

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