Hit on today

CindyLouWho said:
So running errands today, started walking from the parking lot into a store and I hear a man say " I like your smile", (I had my mask on).

So, my first impression was that he wasn't shy, secondly, he was handsome, appeared to be in his 60's, in shape, in a nice vehicle......
Then we started talking about masks, Covid, etc., then he started talking about how he likes to go to thrift stores and flea markets and asked if I liked to do that......I'm standing there thinking this conversation I'm having with this stranger is very comfortable and effortless......(how funny this is happening since I woke up today feeling pretty down and sick of being alone....)
Then...I asked him what made him roll down his window, in the first place, and say he liked my smile? He says, "your blond hair...I like it". (Ok..well anyway).....
Then this other guy shows up outside his driver side window, beckoning to me to tell the guy to roll down his window.
Obviously they knew each and were talking back and forth for a minute, catching up.....the guy in the car tells his friend he just picked up his new hat and some other (political) items, and he stops to say to me, " I don't know what your affiliation is?".......
Well he starts going on to his friend, (his voice escalating) and the friend engaging in this political conversation.
Then the guy in the car catches himself and says to me, "well that's a conversation for a different time". (I'm thinking, yeah, politics, never, once you get a a roll....that was just a glimpse, courtesy of his friend stopping by)

So, the guy outside the car leaves and we talk a few more minutes and then he says, " I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything (his humor, I'm guessing) but... (reaches for cloth bag in car) and hands me a business card with pre-written home phone # and a text # (hmm...thinking how often does he pull this maneuver?) Says he used to work at the business on the card and is now a retired Air Force man and says "if you want to send me a text or call me we can meet up and do something some time".

So, I went from thinking this might actual be someone I may want to meet up with and get to know, to no, guess not.

Crap.

Would you contact him further?
Click to expand...
You should have run in the opposite direction when he said "I like your smile" and you are wearing a mask. That is all you needed to hear. Seriously.
 

Martha Ferris said:
You should have run in the opposite direction when he said "I like your smile" and you are wearing a mask. That is all you needed to hear. Seriously.
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My thought exactly but that didn't happen, then there is the reason for that kind of thinking. Unlike the 1970's when Ted Bundy was a prolific serial killer there is a wealth of information that causes the kind of self preservation you post about.

Then & now IMO a huge difference in what to be aware of.
 

@Knight
"Since women's lib & women wanting equality in all things, wouldn't the man be politically correct by letting her make the decision?"

In an email scam, the scammer will say and do nonsensical things, use bad grammar and spelling and have an outlandish story. If the mark falls for that, the scammer goes full speed ahead. Same here, I think. We suffer a loneliness pandemic today, especially older women. If you call him, you took the bite.

My husband always loved playing the odds. As a young man, he decided to see what would happen if he just stood on the corner and ask random women for a date. He discovered there was always basically the same percentage of women who would respond favorably. Had nothing to do with looks, etc. Always the same percentage. Let's call it a social experiment.

This guy knows he'll get lucky a certain percentage. So, it has nothing to do with the charms of Cindy as an individual. IMO.
 
Pepper said:
@Knight
"Since women's lib & women wanting equality in all things, wouldn't the man be politically correct by letting her make the decision?"

In an email scam, the scammer will say and do nonsensical things, use bad grammar and spelling and have an outlandish story. If the mark falls for that, the scammer goes full speed ahead. Same here, I think. We suffer a loneliness pandemic today, especially older women. If you call him, you took the bite.

My husband always loved playing the odds. As a young man, he decided to see what would happen if he just stood on the corner and ask random women for a date. He discovered there was always basically the same percentage of women who would respond favorably. Had nothing to do with looks, etc. Always the same percentage. Let's call it a social experiment.

This guy knows he'll get lucky a certain percentage. So, it has nothing to do with the charms of Cindy as an individual. IMO.
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At the mans guessed age of in his 60's the odds of "getting lucky" probably are diminished quite a bit.

IMO there has to be skill involved with spotting a woman in a mask as vulnerable, single, ready & willing to stop on the passenger side of a vehicle & chat with a stranger for several minutes.
 
Knight said:
At the mans guessed age of in his 60's the odds of "getting lucky" probably are diminished quite a bit.

IMO there has to be skill involved with spotting a woman in a mask as vulnerable, single, ready & willing to stop on the passenger side of a vehicle & chat with a stranger for several minutes.
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Well, if he is approaching women and telling them that he likes their smile when they are wearing a mask there's a reason he needs to get lucky. He is either an idiot of thinks women are. Has an "L' on his forehead. Sadly there are too many women who will get twitterpated over the attention and ignore the obvious. Or maybe he is a predator. If he is that good at spotting, in your words "vulnerable, ready and willing" he leans toward predator.
 
Martha Ferris said:
Well, if he is approaching women and telling them that he likes their smile when they are wearing a mask there's a reason he needs to get lucky. He is either an idiot of thinks women are. Has an "L' on his forehead. Sadly there are too many women who will get twitterpated over the attention and ignore the obvious. Or maybe he is a predator. If he is that good at spotting, in your words "vulnerable, ready and willing" he leans toward predator.
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That's part of the mystery. She was walking across a parking lot. No explanation other than to get her attention he said she had a nice smile. If he was standing by his car, walking back to his car or even got out to make the comment that might make sense to me. But according to the post as best as can be determined he was sitting in his car on the drivers side with the window up.

I don't know how tall she is but to say he looked to be in his 60's handsome & fit it seems to me she would have to get close enough & lean down to look thru the passenger side widow to make those observations.

She was talking to him thru the passenger side window. We know that because she said someone came up on the drivers side, he had to roll the window down to talk to that someone. She waited until the man outside the car left then according to her began talking to him for a couple more minutes.

He would have to be one heck of a skilled predator to spot & somehow convince a masked woman to stop & chat with him for several minutes.
 
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When I lived in NYC, I was walking home. There was a young woman in front of me. She kept glancing back at me, and i knew what was going through her mind. We got across the street from my building. For some reason , she crossed the street. When I started to cross, to go home, she got really scared. I yelled to her "Lady, I'm gay." I can understand wanting to say you aren't a threat to a woman, but there's is just something in the " I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything " line. It's kind of like you meet some one, and they "I'm not going to kill you". HUH? It's just too specific a non-threat.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
When I lived in NYC, I was walking home. There was a young woman in front of me. She kept glancing back at me, and i knew what was going through her mind. We got across the street from my building. For some reason , she crossed the street. When I started to cross, to go home, she got really scared. I yelled to her "Lady, I'm gay." I can understand wanting to say you aren't a threat to a woman, but there's is just something in the " I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything " line. It's kind of like you meet some one, and they "I'm not going to kill you". HUH? It's just too specific a non-threat.
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You have to remember the conversations lasted for several minutes. The content unknown. But just to speculate what if that comment preceded his offering his card with contact info? She accepted the card, wouldn't that make a difference?

This whole thread is about a man saying he liked a smile which wasn't visible. The woman for whatever her reason instead of saying thank you to the stranger & continuing on her way stopped & chatted for several minutes.

Like a lot of news articles the reader is left with very little to go on. The focus seems to be on the comment " I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything " line. The timing of that as I pointed out what if that comment preceded his offering his card with contact info?

As in I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything " how about we meet somewhere here's my contact info. Which she accepted.

We just don't know. All we do know is that she was happy when he said what he initially said.
 
Ha šŸ‘¹ in that this occurred in NYC where the male stated "I'm not going to rip your clothes" is a good statement.
The chances of getting your clothes ripped off in NYC are not remote; be you male of female.
Ask FastTrax, he got out of NYC
 
Unreal. You gents have analyzed and basically shamed the OP. She told you what happened and youā€™ve criticized everything she did. You interpreted everything. You werenā€™t there, she was. Nothing happened. She was aware of the situation. You donā€™t need to save her. This is a member here, not a stranger in a newspaper article. Please give your critiquing a rest.
 
Jules said:
Unreal. You gents have analyzed and basically shamed the OP. She told you what happened and youā€™ve criticized everything she did. You interpreted everything. You werenā€™t there, she was. Nothing happened. She was aware of the situation. You donā€™t need to save her. This is a member here, not a stranger in a newspaper article. Please give your critiquing a rest.
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She posted a lengthy description of an encounter about a handsome, fit. 60 something stranger in a nice car & asked for opinions. As you can see by the various posts most keyed in on the comment about ripping clothes off but ignored the rest of the content.

IMO it's not shaming to actually read the entire 1st. post then offer an opinion based on the way the encounter began, the length of time spent chatting with a stranger.

You are right we weren't there all we have to base an opinion on is the entire post not just one line. But some will do just that.
 
Jules said:
Unreal. You gents have analyzed and basically shamed the OP. She told you what happened and youā€™ve criticized everything she did. You interpreted everything. You werenā€™t there, she was. Nothing happened. She was aware of the situation. You donā€™t need to save her. This is a member here, not a stranger in a newspaper article. Please give your critiquing a rest.
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Jules, I just wanted to reach out and thank you for your recent reply on my behalf, it meant the world to me. It speaks to your strong character, compassion, courage and most of all, insightfulness. You are one in a million. šŸ˜‡

This thread, otherwise, does not deserve any more of my time, since it was taken in a spiteful, hateful direction initiated by Knight and then continued by his "followers", suprisingly, mostly women. The other comments, made mostly my men, who made jokes at the situation, go figure, some can only use "humor" as a way of communicating.

There has never been a "mystery" to my post, or reason to question the validity. My only mistake was thinking I could come here and share. Obviously, I know it's a misnomer to think anyone on a forum, for the most part is someone you can trust or reach out to. It's a microcosm of the real world. Sometimes for whatever reason though, difficult changes in your life, loss of loved ones, no where else to turn, etc., may prompt you to try and reach out...either that..... or you just don't.

The internet sets up a perfect senario for cowards, naysayers and crass people to hide behind their computers spewing and projecting their insecurties, triggers and miserableness with themselves and their own lives at others. How bold, presumptuous and insenstive is that when you don't even know the other person, (a good person), and what they have been through or may be going through at the present time? Would you say these comments face to face? ......well, ok, you probably would.

Vindictive replies by those of you in this thread are triggered and spurred by your own issues within yourself, a gross overreaction. Instead of lashing out at others, spend some time asking yourself why you would you reply with such animousity, and most imortantly what is the trade off you are getting out of doing that? It has nothing to do with me.......your nastiness it all about....you.

Move on. Unglue yourself from the forum chair and go buy some real "mystery" books to fill your insatiable narcissistic need.
 
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Would you say these comments face to face? ......well, ok, you probably would.

Yes I would. I asked my wife what she would do. Her reply say thank you & move on. But for whatever reason a well informed senior lady stopped & chatted several minutes, with a stranger in a nice car.

You think animosity was the basis it wasn't. But curiosity about why a woman would spend several minutes talking to a stranger then post to ask should she contact him again was. Not surprising to me that women thought the same as my wife. This is the internet that has people like me questioning, not simply bobbing my head up & down in agreement. If we all did that there would be no reason to ask for & get opinions we may not like.

Notice unlike you I made no assumptions or judge you. Questioning the why of things has always been something I do. As a way to understand others that has worked for me all my life.
 
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squatting dog said:
Scary stuff Gaer. If and when there are no police close by, a small revolver in the purse. Simple to operate, point and pull... no slide action or safety buttons to worry about in a sudden and extremely dangerous situation.


View attachment 168084
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Years ago, I was in line at the market cashier & a woman in front of me didn't notice what fell out of her purse when she took out her wallet. A nice High Standard 22 Magnum Derringer - this one. I quickly picked it up before other shoppers noticed it & freaked out. While we chatted outside the store, I explained that it was an "OK" choice, but it only has 2 shots & a snub .38 isn't much bigger & has 5 shots that are more effective. She thanked me. (I pity the guy who messes with her). :ROFLMAO:
098-E3-BE6-564-C-4-A8-A-ABD4-8375930582-F0.jpg
 
I'm a guy so I don't know. No one ever did that to me. LOL Actually, I believe in taking it slow and easy. Long term dating is a good idea. Can't really tell you what to do but trust your gut feelings. Beware of any red flags at all times. Good luck!
 
I've learned to trust my instincts when it comes to other people - male or female.

This guy made too many inappropriate remakes to a woman he didn't know at all. That bothers me. OTOH, many gals still like the bad-boy, even though they should be mature enough to have learned that lesson. So, maybe it works for him.

The other day while walking a public path, I was passed by a lady who greated me with a cheery good morning and made some other friendly remarks. Then she kept on going. Who knows? If she does it again, I may try to chat further.
 
CindyLouWho said:
So running errands today, started walking from the parking lot into a store and I hear a man say " I like your smile", (I had my mask on).

So, my first impression was that he wasn't shy, secondly, he was handsome, appeared to be in his 60's, in shape, in a nice vehicle......
Then we started talking about masks, Covid, etc., then he started talking about how he likes to go to thrift stores and flea markets and asked if I liked to do that......I'm standing there thinking this conversation I'm having with this stranger is very comfortable and effortless......(how funny this is happening since I woke up today feeling pretty down and sick of being alone....)
Then...I asked him what made him roll down his window, in the first place, and say he liked my smile? He says, "your blond hair...I like it". (Ok..well anyway).....
Then this other guy shows up outside his driver side window, beckoning to me to tell the guy to roll down his window.
Obviously they knew each and were talking back and forth for a minute, catching up.....the guy in the car tells his friend he just picked up his new hat and some other (political) items, and he stops to say to me, " I don't know what your affiliation is?".......
Well he starts going on to his friend, (his voice escalating) and the friend engaging in this political conversation.
Then the guy in the car catches himself and says to me, "well that's a conversation for a different time". (I'm thinking, yeah, politics, never, once you get a a roll....that was just a glimpse, courtesy of his friend stopping by)

So, the guy outside the car leaves and we talk a few more minutes and then he says, " I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything (his humor, I'm guessing) but... (reaches for cloth bag in car) and hands me a business card with pre-written home phone # and a text # (hmm...thinking how often does he pull this maneuver?) Says he used to work at the business on the card and is now a retired Air Force man and says "if you want to send me a text or call me we can meet up and do something some time".

So, I went from thinking this might actual be someone I may want to meet up with and get to know, to no, guess not.

Crap.

Would you contact him further?
Click to expand...
You did the right thing by just being pleasant and walking away without giving him any personal information about yourself. Did you notice if he was still in the parking lot when you left the store. Always beware if there is a possibility that someone can follow you and see where you live.
 
Sassycakes said:
You did the right thing by just being pleasant and walking away without giving him any personal information about yourself. Did you notice if he was still in the parking lot when you left the store. Always beware if there is a possibility that someone can follow you and see where you live.
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Hi sassy....If it was me, I would not even look at him....No matter what age I was....
It seems she did stay their for a while....Not Good.....If you don't know who the heck
he is......Go away!!!! Trust me!....
 
CindyLouWho said:
So running errands today, started walking from the parking lot into a store and I hear a man say " I like your smile", (I had my mask on).

So, my first impression was that he wasn't shy, secondly, he was handsome, appeared to be in his 60's, in shape, in a nice vehicle......
Then we started talking about masks, Covid, etc., then he started talking about how he likes to go to thrift stores and flea markets and asked if I liked to do that......I'm standing there thinking this conversation I'm having with this stranger is very comfortable and effortless......(how funny this is happening since I woke up today feeling pretty down and sick of being alone....)
Then...I asked him what made him roll down his window, in the first place, and say he liked my smile? He says, "your blond hair...I like it". (Ok..well anyway).....
Then this other guy shows up outside his driver side window, beckoning to me to tell the guy to roll down his window.
Obviously they knew each and were talking back and forth for a minute, catching up.....the guy in the car tells his friend he just picked up his new hat and some other (political) items, and he stops to say to me, " I don't know what your affiliation is?".......
Well he starts going on to his friend, (his voice escalating) and the friend engaging in this political conversation.
Then the guy in the car catches himself and says to me, "well that's a conversation for a different time". (I'm thinking, yeah, politics, never, once you get a a roll....that was just a glimpse, courtesy of his friend stopping by)

So, the guy outside the car leaves and we talk a few more minutes and then he says, " I'm not going to rip your clothes off or anything (his humor, I'm guessing) but... (reaches for cloth bag in car) and hands me a business card with pre-written home phone # and a text # (hmm...thinking how often does he pull this maneuver?) Says he used to work at the business on the card and is now a retired Air Force man and says "if you want to send me a text or call me we can meet up and do something some time".

So, I went from thinking this might actual be someone I may want to meet up with and get to know, to no, guess not.

Crap.

Would you contact him further?
Click to expand...
No way!
 
CindyLouWho said:
Jules, I just wanted to reach out and thank you for your recent reply on my behalf, it meant the world to me. It speaks to your strong character, compassion, courage and most of all, insightfulness. You are one in a million. šŸ˜‡

This thread, otherwise, does not deserve any more of my time, since it was taken in a spiteful, hateful direction initiated by Knight and then continued by his "followers", suprisingly, mostly women. The other comments, made mostly my men, who made jokes at the situation, go figure, some can only use "humor" as a way of communicating.

There has never been a "mystery" to my post, or reason to question the validity. My only mistake was thinking I could come here and share. Obviously, I know it's a misnomer to think anyone on a forum, for the most part is someone you can trust or reach out to. It's a microcosm of the real world. Sometimes for whatever reason though, difficult changes in your life, loss of loved ones, no where else to turn, etc., may prompt you to try and reach out...either that..... or you just don't.

The internet sets up a perfect senario for cowards, naysayers and crass people to hide behind their computers spewing and projecting their insecurties, triggers and miserableness with themselves and their own lives at others. How bold, presumptuous and insenstive is that when you don't even know the other person, (a good person), and what they have been through or may be going through at the present time? Would you say these comments face to face? ......well, ok, you probably would.

Vindictive replies by those of you in this thread are triggered and spurred by your own issues within yourself, a gross overreaction. Instead of lashing out at others, spend some time asking yourself why you would you reply with such animousity, and most imortantly what is the trade off you are getting out of doing that? It has nothing to do with me.......your nastiness it all about....you.

Move on. Unglue yourself from the forum chair and go buy some real "mystery" books to fill your insatiable narcissistic need.
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Oooh gurrlll...TRUTH!!! Love it!! And a simple answer to your original question...No I wouldn't.
 
AnnieA said:
The part I bolded struck me because predators pick up on vulnerability. The only two times in my life I've been stalked through a mall/store, I felt really bad those days. Gavin de Becker's The Gift of Fear covers that and so much more so well. Trust your instincts.
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The Gift of Fear should be required reading for every young woman, definitely by time she's dating. Maybe for guys too, to help them 'get it'.
I'm not easily intimidated by much of anything but i do believe that a certain level of gut instinct, voice in the head saying 'i'm not trusting this person' is healthy. As i would say to guys who said "You're hurting my feelings." Cause i wouldn't be alone with them, 'Better your feelings than my body.'
 
CindyLouWho said:
That's exactly what I was thinking as I was driving home.....well, at least I have some Pinot Noir chilling in my fridge.
It was a fun minute while it lasted.
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If you're curious, wouldn't hurt to check his fb. Then if you update everyone here, you have an impressive panel of judges who can spot red flags waiting for you. I only saw 2. :unsure::cry:
 

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