I agree.
I'm Incredibly Depressed
- Thread starter Nihil
- Start date
Irritable, sh*t
Argumentative, more like it
And, in my very limited but very direct experience, the depressed folks I’ve been around don’t even have the gumption to argue
I’m gonna go out on a limb here and wager Nihil is feeling much much better.
And I’m glad to see that
Betcha he created some cool stuff in the last few days
It’s what happens to artists
Get low, sleep for days, get up…..freaking create
I’m ready for the next caller
Lines are open
We all go through periods of time in life where we're down in the dumps, in a slump, seems everything is going wrong. We can honestly say during those times that 'this is depressing', or 'I'm really depressed', that's natural and normal, in my opinion. Life has its ups and downs, we ride out the downs until things get better, and celebrate the positives.
Sometimes I look at the 'big picture' and it puts my problems in perspective. I think of children born with crippling diseases that never live a day in their life without pain and dependence on others for the simplest things. I think of those who have spent their lives lacking vision, or those who have an accident that makes them paralyzed and puts them in a wheelchair. I realize then how lucky I am and how my problems aren't as grave as I was making them.
I think Nihil has been involved in a bumpy relationship for awhile, and now things just came to a head with the separation. It may prove to be a blessing in disguise, only time will tell. IMO, he's just sharing this with us to get it off his chest and maybe get some constructive input from us, am I'm glad he did.
Even though I already gave my thoughts on this earlier, I don't expect Nihil to take all advice and I don't think it's reasonable to assume that we know everything he's thinking or feeling just be reading a few sentences he wrote trying to describe why he's depressed right now.
In no way do I think he should run out to a 'therapist' or get a prescription for pills that may do more harm than good.
Nihil, it's understandable why you're feeling down right now, sixteen years was a long time even if it wasn't perfect, and now it's over. Maybe you guys will get back together and be more open with each other to improve on your relationship. Maybe you both agree it's not worth saving. Perhaps even if you separate for good, you can still be friends.
In any regard, I do wish the best for you. I suggest you try to do something you enjoy, try to stay positive and distract yourself by getting involved with a new interest or hobby. Don't stop looking to the future, just because it's gloomy today. Good luck and take care of yourself.
Sometimes I look at the 'big picture' and it puts my problems in perspective. I think of children born with crippling diseases that never live a day in their life without pain and dependence on others for the simplest things. I think of those who have spent their lives lacking vision, or those who have an accident that makes them paralyzed and puts them in a wheelchair. I realize then how lucky I am and how my problems aren't as grave as I was making them.
I think Nihil has been involved in a bumpy relationship for awhile, and now things just came to a head with the separation. It may prove to be a blessing in disguise, only time will tell. IMO, he's just sharing this with us to get it off his chest and maybe get some constructive input from us, am I'm glad he did.
Even though I already gave my thoughts on this earlier, I don't expect Nihil to take all advice and I don't think it's reasonable to assume that we know everything he's thinking or feeling just be reading a few sentences he wrote trying to describe why he's depressed right now.
In no way do I think he should run out to a 'therapist' or get a prescription for pills that may do more harm than good.
Nihil, it's understandable why you're feeling down right now, sixteen years was a long time even if it wasn't perfect, and now it's over. Maybe you guys will get back together and be more open with each other to improve on your relationship. Maybe you both agree it's not worth saving. Perhaps even if you separate for good, you can still be friends.
In any regard, I do wish the best for you. I suggest you try to do something you enjoy, try to stay positive and distract yourself by getting involved with a new interest or hobby. Don't stop looking to the future, just because it's gloomy today. Good luck and take care of yourself.
C'est Moi
Dishin' it out.
- Location
- Houston Y'all
People seem to have missed this update. I hope things work out for you.
I did and yes Nihil , I’m an idiot.
https://thoughtcatalog.com/mei-mei/...aling-with-those-who-are-emotionally-damaged/
I apologize Nihil for not seeing this post earlier, I did mention that you guys may try to work things out in my last reply. Happy to hear that it's happening already, and I wish the best for you. Hopefully your daughter doesn't interfere with your relationship and supports both of you instead.
Thank you C'est Moi, I absolutely missed it, seems to have gotten lost here.
Shalimar
SF VIP
- Location
- Vancouver Island Canada
In case anyone has concerns, therapists are not permitted to dispense scrips for drugs. Psychiatrists and MD’s are the only ones who can.
I just found out yesterday that my boyhood’s best friend from the time we were 5 until we were 18, died the day before from throat cancer. The news really floored me and I have been incredibly sad, not depressed, just sad ever since. I spent some time reflecting back to our years and life together and it just made me even sadder. I will deal with this because I know as time moves on, I will feel a little better each day, but for now, I just need some time to mourn this loss.
As I see it, the difference between being sad and being depressed is that being sad can be applied to a single event in one’s life, but being depressed is generally applied to one’s life and everything in it. Right or wrong, it’s what works for me.
Oldman, my sympathy for your loss, rest in peace for your friend. I agree with what you said about being sad and depressed.
RadishRose
SF VIP
- Location
- Connecticut, USA
Oldman, I am sorry for this loss. As you know, grief is a normal reaction and a process. May your mourning lift quickly. :love_heart:
Thanks, SeaBreeze. Just wanted to add that I was told that my friend was ill about 2 months ago, but not to what extent. Now, I have some guilt feelings because I did not at least call. When we graduated, he enlisted in the Army and I went to college. Then, when he came home, I went into the Marines. He was in Vietnam and so was I. Supposedly, his throat cancer came from Agent Orange. His job was to carry the phone for his Colonel, so he never saw combat, although he was in a combat zone. I was in an Infantry Battalion before being switched to Recon. We shared a lot of stories a few years later at a class reunion, but then we became distant to one another. It just happens sometimes, I guess.
Sorry to go off subject, but it helps to talk about the loss that I feel.
I've decided that it's best if my ex and I are just roommates. She's put conditions on her love for me, and I'm not going to do conditional love. We're both through with sexual intimacy in general, so that won't be a problem. I can watch Call the Midwife with her and discuss how we interpret the episodes. I always go pretty deep, as the writing and directing are amazing. Other than that show, we don't have much in common. I'm tired of pretending to be someone I'm not to participate in her social activities.
I have no problem being intimate with cats, but humans are a dangerous species in my eyes. As much as I see optimism as irresponsible, I still have hope that I will be able to be intimate with people someday. It must be a biological drive.
I have no problem being intimate with cats, but humans are a dangerous species in my eyes. As much as I see optimism as irresponsible, I still have hope that I will be able to be intimate with people someday. It must be a biological drive.
That sounds like a good arrangement for you two at this point Nihil, you can have each other for companionship when desired, and put intimate relations on the back burner. Also, it's better if you don't force yourself to participate in her social activities if you're unhappy or uncomfortable doing it.
I hope this works well for the both of you. I'm lucky enough to be in a happy long term marriage, but I know what you mean about humans, I often say that I like animals more than people. But, I do believe that someday you'll meet someone unexpectedly and the two of you will 'click', a friendship may start, your interests may be more aligned and it may bloom into special relationship. Never give up, you deserve happiness in your life, right now things sound doable for you...I'm happy for you, hang in there.
To be fair, my love turned out to be conditional as well. I was an absurdist when I met my Gf through a mutual friend. I was used to existing as a likable outsider. I was hoping I might ride out my absurdist personality with my GF while giving her insight into my actual thinking. This has just confused her and frustrated me. I was really looking for another absurdist. Now that I can’t pretend to be someone else in order to coexist with humanity, I just appear as a misanthrope to her. I needed her to see humanity they way I see it. That’s not fair to her.
C'est Moi
Dishin' it out.
- Location
- Houston Y'all
I'm not sure what all that means, but the best plan is to be yourself with people. Then they will know YOU, and there won't be any surprises. If there is true love, it's "warts and all" as far as I'm concerned.
treeguy64
Hari Om, y'all!
- Location
- Austin, TX.
I think it's a bad idea to live as roommates, if you're wanting to find a new relationship. I tried that, once, with a former gf, and it was very strange, when women I brought home kept asking me about my roommate. Most were not cool with having her around, once they knew our past. If you can make it work, more power to you, but even though I know attitudes have changed, in the last thirty years, I still think you're going to run into problems. If I met a woman I became interested in, and she was living with her ex, I'd be gone, like a cool breeze!
