Monday Punday...

[Jace]

Did you hear the government's machine that makes coins...stopped working

But..that doesn't make sense.

 

[Ruthanne]

Now I got it! LOL

 

[Sassycakes]

What did the grape say when it got crushed?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

 

[Kaila]

@Jace

Grooooooaaaannnn......



The reply post by @Sassycakes seems like a high potential winner to me,
for best reply of this thread.

 

[CallMeKate]

Have you heard the new song about burritos? It's a rap. (I'm not lion!)

 

[Alligatorob]

There's the story of the Hotel Mercy, in Australia, whose tea is made from koala fur. It contained a lot of fuzz, because: "The koala tea of Mercy is not strained."

Not sure if that's a pun, but there you have it.

 

[CallMeKate]

There's the story of the Hotel Mercy, in Australia whose tea, made from koala fur. It contained a lot of fuzz, because: "The koala tea of Mercy is not strained."

Not sure if that's a pun, but there you have it.

It sure is... and a great one!

 

[Marie5656]

• Why shouldn't you trust stairs? They're always up to something.
• I had a taser once. It was stunning.
• Know any good rope jokes? I'm a frayed knot.

PS..if you are in the market for a good pun...ask Alexa. She tells good ones

 

[Kaila]

Why shouldn't you trust stairs? They're always up to something.

And if you live in an upstairs apartment, they're all downhill from here!

 

[Dustbunny]

I was going to make a chemistry joke, but since I'm kinda late to the thread, the good ones argon.

 

[Alligatorob]

Why shouldn't you trust stairs? They're always up to something.

Speaking of that kind of thing, I've had several step ladders, but never knew my real ladder.

 

[Sassycakes]

I want to be cremated as it is my last hope for a smoking hot body.

 

[PeppermintPatty]

@Jace

Grooooooaaaannnn......

No kidding! lol
But most pun jokes are.

A crazy wife says to her husband that moose are falling from the sky. The husband says, it’s reindeer.

That’s so bad.

 

[Sassycakes]

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off!


A cross-eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

There was a kidnapping at school yesterday. Don’t worry, though - he woke up!

 

[Dustbunny]

I had an “hourglass” figure, but then the sand shifted.

 

[Alligatorob]

A crazy wife says to her husband that moose are falling from the sky. The husband says, it’s reindeer.

You've heard about the Soviet Russian who got into an argument with his wife, he said it was raining, she said it was snowing. Finally the husband threw up his hands and said "Rudolph the Red knows rain dear".

 

[Dustbunny]

A bottle of Omega 3 Fatty Acids fell on my head yesterday at the store.
Don’t worry, I only got super fish oil injuries.

 

[Kaila]

Why coat a fish before you cook it?
Seems senseless to me.
After all, it'll be too hot for needing a coat, or even a sweater.

 

[Jace]

My cousin is an archeologist...his career is in ruins.

 

[Kaila]

My cousin is an archeologist...his career is in ruins.

I love how easily a post like yours, and the other posts in this thread, can add a welcome, and even shared,
smile and laugh, to my day!
Thanks to all.

 

[Kaila]

When is a mountain, no taller than a mouse?

answer: When it's a mountain of dust.

When is a mountain, no taller than myself?

answer:
When it is a mountain of papers/mail/items, on the table or desk, waiting to be sorted.

 

[Sassycakes]

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back for seconds

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?
There was nothing left but de Brie!

I'm no cheetah, you're lion!

 

[Dustbunny]

If a kid won't take a nap, is that resisting a rest?

 

[horseless carriage]

To the guy who invented zero. Thanks for nothing.
Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.
The guy who invented the door knocker got a no-bell prize.

 

[Kaila]

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back for seconds