Neighbor is Going Weird on Us

fureverywhere

fureverywhere

beloved friend who will always be with us in spiri
Location
Northern NJ, USA
Bless this woman that she and her partner lived next door for many, many years. Hubby's family grew up here. His brother was the monster child...fireworks tossed into yards, bongs buried in the garden, shady people and police cruising by at all hours. He is long gone now and we have the house.

This is the 'burbs and houses are packed together. We have a big backyard though with an eight foot fence on all sides. This neighbors driveway is against one side of the yard. Still even when she parks there, it is a good ten feet walking distance from the fence. The problem is our backyard.

The yard slopes, meaning on her side the fence is a level eight feet tall. On ours near the house the fence is about five feet, then up to six feet and finally up to eight. It would take heavy machinery to remove the soil to make even a trench on that side. The fence is wooden, old, and warped.

Suddenly after four years this woman has decided she is terrified of my dogs. You know it's Callie...she always thought Sophie was such a good well behaved dog. Sure a lot of people have thought that. They didn't know she was terrified of strangers, so of course she stayed close to me.

In her fear as she's gotten older she's much more barky and excitable. Callie sees her go bananas and gets over excited. It's her barking and knowing he's there that seems to scaring this woman so much. They can't get to her. But I think if Callie were a beagle she wouldn't be going nuts.

Financially we are in a bad way. This woman and her partner must be doing okay. She is retired yet still able to pay taxes and a landscaper for her huge yard. She could manage replacing the wooden fence which is technically her property anyway. That would solve the problem. Instead today she sent the police over.
 

I thought fences are a shared responsibility. If you can't afford to pay half then you need to talk to your neighbour about this and see if you can arrive at a mutually agreeable resolution. I would be nervous about your dogs too. You will need to reassure her that she is safe. Can you do this? If not you may have to manage your pets a bit differently.

What did the police say?
 
I just had a new cedar 6' wood privacy fence replaced 10 days ago......the neighbor to the north went half, the neighbor to the south wouldn't so I had to pay all of that side.

I checked, if the fence is on the property line (mine is) it is considered a shared fence but the neighbors have no legal obligation to contribute towards upkeep or replacement so the ones who don't want to spend anything end up getting a free fence.

If the fence is not on the property line but actually on one persons property they own it and it belongs to them and they can maintain it (or not) as they see fit.

Having the lot surveyed to find the actual property line, for a normal size residential lot, runs aprox $585.00 and here the surveyors are allowed by law to be plus or minus three inches.
 

I would be able to pay her back a bit at a time for half of it. I mean she'll probably be here the rest of her life. We'll be lucky for another five to ten. The fence is her property and should be replaced regardless. It's kind of the texture of very big popsicle sticks. You're supposed to paint and seal that kind of wood as least every other year. Guess nobody told her...

But anyway, there's no reason to fear the Callie. He can't get over or under the fence and his bark is pitiful. There are poodles that have a more rousing bark. So all he can really do is lean unseen again the fence chuffing his frustration. Sophie barks like a nut but if you said "BOO" in her face she would fall back and wet herself.

I wish this woman would listen to reason. You don't need the police involved. Unlike some of our neighbors pets they are completely confined. Besides that this woman has a Border Collie of her own. Every day from 8:30 am to 10:30 am it's in it's backyard barking non-stop. Our dogs hardly bark at all, we're also one of the few houses that never had a break in.

If I could talk to her the best solution short of replacing the wood fence with stockade would be a hose on her side. As she gets out of her car pick up the hose. Maybe not even power wash...just a good soaking with cold water. I know it would only take a few times and both dogs would avoid that side always.

It worked with Sophie. I had a spray bottle when we first got her. Chase a cat and whooosh. After a week I only had to touch the bottle and she would run from the cat.
 
Okay...I talked to the family on the other side for a long while. We found a compromise. Simply if the dogs are out somebody is with them. With my kids I'll have to crack the whip. But if I take them out...a good book and cold drink, hey I could put a lawn chair out there. If one of us is out there keeping watch the pooches are well behaved...win/win

I feel bad though with the Mom telling me how scared her kids are of the dogs in general. With best buddie's nieces and nephews, in public at fairs and playgrounds...Callie is a kiddie magnet. He could even be a service dog he loves children so much. But when it's his yard I guess his priorities go awry...I'm sad he can't teach the neighbor children how gentle he really is.
 
IKE sums it up. If it's on her property it's hers to fix, demolish or replace. I'd be careful about turning it into a neighbor war, if the war heats one only knows what their WMD would consist of ie how good are their lawyers or political connections to get your property inspected with a fine tooth comb.

Also as dogs age they lose their hearing. They can't identify sounds they way they used to so their barking is frequently out of fear. Sounds like they are two old timers worried about keeping distance for safety reasons. Might try explaining that to her. But instead of talking to you first yes the police were a little much.
 
In her fear as she's gotten older she's much more barky and excitable. Callie sees her go bananas and gets over excited. It's her barking and knowing he's there that seems to scaring this woman so much. They can't get to her. But I think if Callie were a beagle she wouldn't be going nuts.
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I can't tell who you're talking about in this paragraph. Does "she" still refer to your neighbor? Who's barky and excitable? Callie sees "her" -- who? Too many pronouns for me here. Who are "they"? She lived there for many, many years, so what are the four years about?

The woman who's lived next door for many many years is suddenly afraid of one of your dogs because the fence isn't high enough anymore?
 
fureverywhere, all states have barking dog laws on their books. Usually, after 3 visits from the police, a person receives a citation. It surprised me that she just didn't call animal control.

The fence, if it's owned by the neighbor, what happens, once it really gets dilapidated and she just decides to remove it and not replace it? Could happen. She's not obligated to replace it. Then, what?

Here's a suggestion...if your dogs don't like water, why not run a hose to the fence and put one of those pulsating sprinkler heads on it...then, when your dogs get too close or bark, turn it on. They'll get the hint quickly.

Or...you can just turn the hose on your neighbor and tell her to STHU! *said with sarcasm* lol
 
I'm a little surprised that someone would expect a neighbor, who has a fence, to go and get a hose every time she gets out of her car and turn it on to keep her neighbor's dogs away from her fence. If anyone asked me to do that I would laugh in their face.

Good grief.

Who's gonna pay her water bill?
 
SifuPhil said:
Exactly.

But some people will call the police for the most innocent matters. To them it's like having a cheap lawyer.

People just don't know how to settle matters themselves anymore.
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Here, the police wouldn't even come out for barking dogs. They'd tell you to call animal control and quit bothering the police with trivia. They get kinda snippy when you want them to come out for barking dogs when they are trying to deal with robberies, rapes, etc.
 
I don't believe your neighbor has developed a sudden fear of your dogs. I believe she is annoyed with the sudden change in your dogs behavior, which is the barking. You need to stop the barking. There are devises out there that can control barking. Look into it and if the barking stops, I'm willing to bet so will the so-called fear of your neighbor.
 
I have found the perfect answer. The dogs want to go out and I have a pile of books by the door. The almighty food person goes out to sit on the steps. Pups go in the yard and do their thing, no barking or growling because the human is on it. Then they go and sit beside Mami until she picks up her book and goes inside...no fuss, no muss. Mostly I feel guilty because I didn't realize how they were scaring people. Sophie is afraid if you say BOO, but she likes the sound of her own bark. Callie is the most easygoing dog you could meet...but yeah he looks like a nightmare fighting pup...Now I can make nice with neighbors.
 
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