Not that anyone is asking

Pinky said:
If I had witnessed Bonnie's boyfriend doing that, I would have torn his eyes out! What an SOB! I wish I'd been there to see you sock him in the nose :mad:

She is so fortunate to have you and Michelle 👼👼
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I also smacked him upside the head.

Always follow a poke in the nose with a solid smack upside the head. Immediately. It's a punctuation that makes your offender feel defeated from the get-go. Makes 'em less likely to retaliate.

This morning I'm wondering if the boyfriend taking off her gown is attention that Bonnie wants from him, know what I mean? It ain't happenin' no matter what, but I might talk to her about it when she's lucid.
 

Pepper said:
maybe boyfriend trying to stimulate her back to life?????? or is that giving him too much credit?
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Too much credit, imo.

I've known this guy for several years. He's typical of the kind of men she likes to have around; an enabler, keeps her dependent on him, never encourages her to do stuff on her own.

Speaking of stimulants, I think he's been bringing her some.. Someone did. A bunch of her friends came over yesterday and I found a pill in her bed last night...it doesn't match any of her Rxs. If I'm gonna have to frisk and supervise her visitors, then either this isn't the place for her, or there'll be no more visits from her so-called friends, period.

I'm gonna show her visiting nurse that pill. Maybe, just maybe it's one she had before the ones I picked up on Saturday. But if it is, how'd it get in her bed last night? I change it every day.
 
Murrmurr said:
I also smacked him upside the head.

Always follow a poke in the nose with a solid smack upside the head. Immediately. It's a punctuation that makes your offender feel defeated from the get-go. Makes 'em less likely to retaliate.

This morning I'm wondering if the boyfriend taking off her gown is attention that Bonnie wants from him, know what I mean? It ain't happenin' no matter what, but I might talk to her about it when she's lucid.
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I am wondering about the pills you mention, some drugs make people overheat, sweat. I think MDA/Ecstasy does. Bonnie doesn't sound like she was in any fit state to consent to the boyfriend's behaviour but, even if she was, her condition could make her act irrationally but he has no excuse for disrepecting both your sister and your home. Under the circumstances, giving him a smack or two was well justified.

The physical and mental toll all this must be taking on you and Meesh is hard to imagine, you both can do without visitors bringing more problems with them. x
 
So many of us going through some terrible stuff one way or another this year....

Thank Goodness Bonnie has a big brother who is still a force to be reckoned with... just thinking what would have happened to her if you and she hadn't broken bread and made up after you're estrangement a few years ago..
 
Physicians' Desk Reference will tell you what kind of pill it is. I'd bet it's more of an upper than downer, but that's just a guess.
 
Jules said:
You’re right and Bonnie could be asking for them. I highly doubt she’s in the mood to take her top off. She may not realize that she’s better off without these supposed friends.
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Bonnie is not better off about anything, except Frank & Meesh. If she were really better off, then Bonnie wouldn't need Frank/Meesh either. She is in the depths of despair, there is no better off.
 
Teacher Terry said:
I just wouldn’t let any of them in anymore. The whole thing is disgusting. Plus giving her pills is beyond my comprehension. Ugh!!
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Pepper said:
I would want to be as stoned as possible; anything to change the subject of what is
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It might not mix well with her regular meds, though.

Pepper said:
Physicians' Desk Reference will tell you what kind of pill it is. I'd bet it's more of an upper than downer, but that's just a guess.
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I don't know what I did with mine. No doubt in a box somewhere. I checked online for small round yellow tablet, scored, but can't find one with this exact stamp: APO 1.

I see APO 10 and APO 100, so if this is the same class, it's probably a stimulant. At no point was she Rx'ed a stimulant.
Her hospice nurse will be here tomorrow. I'll show it to her.
 
Bonnie slept all day (it's 6:40pm). She hasn't eaten and only took sips of water w/her meds. I've only given her meds for pain and for swelling (of the brain) today. Her breathing is pretty normal and her color is good. I'm thinking she's just really pooped out from all the visitors over the past 2 days.

Her son said he's coming over later. She'll probly perk up for that.
 
Last night was an absolute nightmare. I called the hospice assist number, I called 911, then hospice again...

Regular hospitals don't like to take hospice patients because of differences in policy - reg hospitals save lives, and hospices aren't about that - so the EMTs refused to take her. They were ...mmm, I guess I'd say *gentle* about it, but they wouldn't take her, so I called the hospice number again. By then, I was really POed, so they finally sent a back-up hospice nurse.

She got here at about midnight, and fortunately, she immediately saw why I was coming unglued trying to get help.

At about 7pm yesterday, Bonnie started screaming and yelling "Help me! Help me!" over and over, and she moaned really loud, and cussed and kicked, spit out her meds, tried to climb out of her bed...and the nurse saw this because it's been practically non-stop since Monday evening. Plus, she hasn't eaten anything since Sunday evening, and I can't get her to drink more than a few sips of liquids every few hours or so.

After observing her for a while, the nurse basically sedated Bonnie, and then got a Dr's approval to increase certain meds and to give them every 2 to 4 hours instead of every 4 to 8 hours.

I slept a total of 3 hours last night. Then Bonnie's team nurse called me at 6am and said she and a social worker would be over this afternoon. They got here at 10am.

They said that what's happening to Bonnie is called Terminal Agitation. It's a dying phase...a symptom of imminent death. The only way to keep her calm and relieve her suffering is sedation, pretty much 24-7. Even tho I've held an RN license and Meesh is in the process of earning one, we can't do that here. So they said they'd call around to find placement and get back to me, but it might take several days. Meanwhile, a nurse would come every day to make sure Bonnie gets the meds and dosages she needs, and maybe do tube feedings.

The nurse just called me to say she found a hospice facility that has room for Bonnie right now!...which is amazing, plus, even more amazing, it's right downtown!
(I also told this nurse about what Bonnie's boyfriend did, and she'll make sure he goes on the No Contact Whatsoever list.)

Bonnie will be transported ASAP...if not today, then tomorrow morning; the nurse'll call back and let me know. I could take one more night of the horribleness we had last night, but I'm glad for Bon that she'll be safe and in a peaceful state very soon (and I'm glad for poor Meesh, too). I did bump up Bonnie's meds today, so she's been restful for a whole couple hours now, but she needs fluids and stuff as soon as possible.

It's amazing how fast she declined in just the 4 days she's been here. It was like, one minute we're barbecuing a chicken and laughing at each other's jokes, and the next minute it looks like I need to call an exorcist.
 
I got a call from the hospice place about an hour ago. Bonnie died this morning. I sensed she was going. All the signs were there; dark urine, extreme restlessness, unexplained bruising, delirium. But it's still kind of a shock. It was so quick. But they probably had her on a lot of depressant drugs. She was not experiencing a peaceful passing. Quite the opposite.

I'm glad she didn't linger, though. And I feel like I did the right thing, sending her to that hospice place. Like I said, she was not experiencing a peaceful passing. It was awful for her. Seemed she was really scared.
 
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