Study: Spanking Your Kids Is Good for Nothing

Robert59

Robert59

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Now I live in Tennesee. Did live in Michigan.
Researchers say it leads to negative outcomes, not positive ones.

The upshot of a new study on spanking children: Just don't do it. "Parents hit their children because they think doing so will improve their behavior," explains senior author Elizabeth Gershoff of the University of Texas at Austin to CNN.

https://www.newser.com/story/307954/study-spanking-your-kids-is-good-for-nothing.html
 

I can definitely believe it doesn't do any good. I spanked my son a couple of times, after he scared me (riding his trike into the street or reaching for the stove) but even those few times, I feel bad about now. I heard one psychologist say that spanking just makes bad memories and that's it for me on both the giving and receiving side.

My fourth grade teacher was lecturing me once, probably about my spelling, and he said since I was the youngest in my family with two older brothers I had probably never been spanked. A classmate who was at our house a lot piped up and said, "Only every day." Yep. My brothers were rarely spanked, but I got some sort of switching or spanking almost every day and while my brothers ended up highly successful millionaires, I was always an underachiever working minimum wage jobs. I think too much punishment and criticism just makes for low self-esteem.
 
I don't for a second buy into the idea that a few pops on a kids rear-end (every now and then, when needed) results in long-term behavioural issues or other long-term consequences.

The old days of sending a child out to select their own switch which would then be used to tan their hide, or taking a wooden spoon, a belt, or a paddle to a child's butt, always had a way of sickening me and still does, and I can't stand spank-happy parents either, who only know how to reach out and hand-down a swat.

Parents have a geranium in their cranium if they feel the need to spank everyday.

I raised six of my own and not one seen the likes of a switch, a belt, a paddle, a wooden spoon, or anything else applied to their bottoms. When I felt someone was in need of a spank on the bottom, they got one, with the flat of my hand, and it did none of them any harm, and I used spanking reservedly... when needed, as a last resort.

As old-school as I am when it comes to being in favour of an occasional swat on a child's behind, I am NOT in support of any school system administering corporal punishment, not at any time, it's not their place, PERIOD, regardless of what some haughty lawmaker says or scratches-down on some cheap sheet of paper.
 

I was the recipient of an awful lot of those spankings as a kid, and I don't think it did me any harm. But maybe not a lot of good either. So long as it is not physically damaging, done correctly and at appropriate times I don't think it hurts.

I still remember well having to go in front of the gym class and bending over for the coach, then having to ask "please sir may I have another" after each lick. It provided entertainment for the others, but did not seem to defer me from getting into trouble again soon. That just took time and maturity, and some might say it never completely stopped...
 
I grew up with parents who were Very strict. I often felt their "rage"....especially from Dad. The Only broken bone I ever had was a broken tail bone after he kicked me in the Butt. That led me to relish the day when I left home and joined the military....and I was never very close to the folks after that.

After what I experienced as a child, I vowed Never to treat my kids like that. When they messed up, their "punishment" consisted of standing in the corner for a few minutes, or some minor loss of privilege's. IMO, subjecting anyone to violence accomplishes Nothing.,
 
Don M. said:
I grew up with parents who were Very strict. I often felt their "rage"....especially from Dad. The Only broken bone I ever had was a broken tail bone after he kicked me in the Butt. That led me to relish the day when I left home and joined the military....and I was never very close to the folks after that.

After what I experienced as a child, I vowed Never to treat my kids like that. When they messed up, their "punishment" consisted of standing in the corner for a few minutes, or some minor loss of privilege's. IMO, subjecting anyone to violence accomplishes Nothing.,
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I would have felt the same, Don.

I wouldn't have been able to look at either one of my parents again had the same happened to me.
 
Alligatorob said:
I was the recipient of an awful lot of those spankings as a kid, and I don't think it did me any harm. But maybe not a lot of good either. So long as it is not physically damaging, done correctly and at appropriate times I don't think it hurts.

I still remember well having to go in front of the gym class and bending over for the coach, then having to ask "please sir may I have another" after each lick. It provided entertainment for the others, but did not seem to defer me from getting into trouble again soon. That just took time and maturity, and some might say it never completely stopped...
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Times were sure different back in the day... such a stark difference compared to today.

Spanking, was my moms regular go-to tool in her toolbox, and my baby siblings and I got it good. That doesn't go to say that I think it was right, I'm just saying.

The spankings I remember from back in the day were abuse, I'd be ashamed and embarrassed to even look at my children if I had paddled their behinds like my mom paddled mine.

Nevertheless, I would have trouble forming a correlation between the spankings I got when I was young and growing, to that of any behavioural issues (i.e., aggression, etc), or learning disabilities, because the latter never formed or metastasized in my life, so I am with you on the idea that it never did me any harm either.
 
Personally, I think we've all seen how "no spanking" has worked out with all the dilettantes, snowflakes and entitled, spoiled brats running around. Where I grew up, the occasional spanking and mouth washed out with (Ivory) soap was the norm and the kids who got it turned out OK. The kids who didn't, not so much.
 
Physical spanking is assault on the child's body. It is never necessary, and from what I've seen, it rarely does any good. What is anyone's reaction when someone hits their body? It is rage, fury, humiliation, a desire to get even. And fear, sometimes crippling them mentally for the rest of their life. And many children who were treated that way do get even, years later, by similarly attacking their own children.

"You won't find that love comes easy,
But that love is always right." From the song "Never Be the Light"

The way to show love to a child is not by physically assaulting them. That is the opposite of love. If they need to be punished for something, there are dozens of gentler ways to make the same point, other than acting like a tyrannical, and often sadistic, brute.
 
JonDouglas said:
Personally, I think we've all seen how "no spanking" has worked out with all the dilettantes, snowflakes and entitled, spoiled brats running around. Where I grew up, the occasional spanking and mouth washed out with (Ivory) soap was the norm and the kids who got it turned out OK. The kids who didn't, not so much.
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Impeccably articulated, and my opinion through-and-through.
 
Spanking is hitting a child. If a parent thinks it is good to hit a child why just the butt, why not hit them in the face? If a parent can't learn how to raise children without beating them they should not have them. Not beating your children has no connection to them being self-serving brats. Obeying your parents will make you a better person. Obedience grows in to schooling, working, socializing and friendships. Life is give and take,
 
Spankings only got positive results in my house. I spanked my kids for specific reasons; lying, stealing, and doing something unsafe after they were warned not to. For general disobedience, they had to hear me talk. They weren't long lectures; I liked to get to the point; but they were effective. But I always let them know when I was proud of them, and showed them lots of affection, too. Most dads were starting to be more affectionate and involved with their kids at the time.
 
My parents were 'extremely' strict with us. And if I was spanked, I must be in denial. lol

I can't remember an instance where I was spanked. I remember my mother would pinch me.

I spanked my stepson once because he was quite stubborn, etc. He was 5 years old. My husband just told me that he spanked him once and it was the year he and I got married. He did not want to live in my home and had a fit. I would not call it a spank, either. It was a swift and harmless spanking.
 
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Sometimes you had to get their attention. In a few weeks my son will be 60 and is doing just fine. His sister is 57 and also doing very well.

It is a very, very long time since I gave either of them a swat.
 
Somehow, I raised my three children without the need for physical assault. We weren't pushovers as parents, and when the kids did something really wrong they were punished, usually with the "go to your room" method. That seemed to work. They grew up to be fine, strong, devoted adults; we are all very close as a family, and they treat their own children with similar kindness. We are (maybe unusually) close as a family, as we're all texting, sending photos, emailing, etc. all day to each other - we live all over the country - and we have a weekly zoom meeting that everybody usually attends. Next month, we are all sharing a beach house, and we are all absolutely crazy about the new baby in the family.

So what would have possibly been any better if we had decided to get their attention by "giving them a swat?" I think the hitting is just the adult letting out their own frustration. Kids can be frustrating, sometimes maddening. But that doesn't give the adults free rein to behave like barbarians.

I don't remember ever being spanked myself as a child. This may be a thing that is handed down from generation to generation. I bet all the people who think hitting children is a necessary part of bringing them up received plenty of spankings themselves as children. How sad.
 
Remember what the Bible says Proverbs 13:24 : "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes." KJV. In the 50's when I grew up, it was the norm. Having been spanked with hands, belts, paddles, and switches and mouth washed out with soap for lying, and cursing, being grounded for weeks, and all the rest of punishments for "inappropriate" behavior, it never worked.
I guess I was "born under a bad sign". :)
I have two children. I spanked my older daughter once when she let the screen door hit her little brother, and I was angry. She was about 6, and immediately she went and hid in a kitchen cabinet, sobbing. I felt like dying. Never again.
 
When I was a toddler, I accidentally pulled a cake off the table and my dad went to swat me on the rear end. My mother stopped him before he could lay a hand on me and told him that he was an adult and never should strike a child. Odd that, because he was a lawyer, but I never was spanked. Nor was my child. My brother did not spank his kids either, but he would make them stand at attention, military style while he read them the riot act. Seeing this just once made him a lifelong enemy of my son. He felt it was morally wrong from every angle.
 
fmdog44 said:
Spanking is hitting a child. If a parent thinks it is good to hit a child why just the butt, why not hit them in the face? If a parent can't learn how to raise children without beating them they should not have them. Not beating your children has no connection to them being self-serving brats. Obeying your parents will make you a better person. Obedience grows in to schooling, working, socializing and friendships. Life is give and take,
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And, if it's OK to hit your kids to make them listen, what's wrong with hitting your wife to make her listen?
 
Spanking is not about "Raising your kids right."
It's more about ignorant parents working out their frustrations & feeling powerful by hitting someone who's smaller & can't hit back.
Where else can someone hit someone & not be arrested?
 

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