What do you consider to be your “place” in life? Has your “place” changed over the years?

Not to be rude or anything but I've never really discovered my place in life. I do some duties that I must do to keep everyone here going and that's about it.
 
Um...Taxi driver? LOL! For a couple years I was ferrying my granddaughter to get allergy shots. Now I'm taking my grandson to the orthodontist, and this summer to tennis camp. Not that I mind. My place now is doting grandmother, hard working wife and housekeeper, and feeder of the local wildlife. (I'm sitting here watching a family of wrens enjoying their breakfast at my window feeder.)
 
Right now my role in life is what it's been for years...part of a card giving team at work. Other than that my life is pretty minimal & pretty quiet. That's ok. Never know what God has planned for the future. ;)
 
Keesha said:
What do you consider to be ‘your place’ in life ?
Has ‘your place’ changed over the years?
Was our place a follower or leader? Both? Or neither?
Now in declining life what is your place in life?
Or do we continue to play our role our until the end?


When I was a child I was continuously being told and shown where my place was by my parents who constantly used me as a pawn in their twisted relationship. As children , who weren’t planned or wanted , my parents made that perfectly clear. Children were meant to be seen but not heard. My parents would prefer if I wasn’t seen or heard but hey....... if there was an opportunity to use me to enhance their dysfunctional life it, was done with no remorse or shame. That part they just dumped on me.
Did I accept this as a way of life and consider it ‘my place?’


Hell NO!
I rebelled continuously.


As a teenager my role in the family changed for the worst. The abuse became more complex and clearly sadistic. Bones were being broken and my own mental health was in danger. I was caught in the middle of a sick, dysfunctional relationship with no safe place to go. I was being used as a convenient scapegoat. It was pure torture at times.


Did I accept this role in my life?


Hell NO!
I rebelled and left at 16, the earliest possible time I could legally do so. It was the most liberating thing I could do and I had to grow up fast in order to function successfully in life but I busted my butt to do so regardless of my mental handicaps and having to deal with Trimethylaminurea, which at the time I didn’t know I had and being shunned was exceptionally hurtful. Unfortunately life doesn’t care and you either accept it and move on or stay stagnant and rot.


Did I accept my role in society as a hideous misfit?


Hell NO! I ploughed through knowing I had a choice to either feel victimized or move forward. I chose to move forward. This wasn’t always easy. Being repeatedly kidnapped and gang raped left me mentally paralyzed and seriously dysfunctional for about a decade of my life. The aftermath of such trauma was almost impossible to deal with but life continues. Some family members THINK they knew what happened to me and had no problem throwing fuel to this burning hell life by casting blame my way and to this day still do.


Did I accept my lot in life as being totally broken and dysfunctional?
YES! I did. The hate I should have had for these people who hideously and viciously abused me, I turned towards myself.
At times I’d suffocate in the thickness of my own self hatred. It was impossible to function normally so I didn’t but DID and still DO get unfairly criticized for it.


Do I accept that all this has happened to me and understand that I’m still a worthy and deserving human being? Do I accept this role?
Sometimes but it’s always a continuous struggle. People can be deviously cruel beyond belief at times so I sometimes wear a suite of armour and keep myself physically strong and mentally quick. It’s a bit of overkill at times, I understand , but that part of me ,to keep fighting , I hope never leaves or I might as well just lay down and DIE.


Has ‘my place’ changed over the years?


I don’t believe I have a ‘place’
I’m equally deserving of love, acceptance and happiness just like every other human being.
I have a choice to either believe this or not.


Was our place a follower? A leader ? Both or neither?


The word OUR confused me. I can’t speak for anyone but myself and I was NEVER a follower and I thank the universe continuously for this.
I’m not a leader nor do I want to be, so the answer would be neither.


I created my own path and always will.


OR do we continue to play out OUR role our entire life?


Once again I can’t answer for anybody but myself.


If I were to accept my role as life’s misfit my entire life I’d be one extremely miserable, heart broken soul and I’m FAR from that.


I DID NOT ACCEPT ANY ROLE EXPECTED OF ME!


I completely despise people putting expectations on me and will REBEL
EVERY SINGLE TIME and I THANK my creator for giving me FREE WILL. The power to make the best choice for ME.


And if people don’t like that...........too friggin’ bad.


Yes I’m dramatic :eek:nthego: but in my opinion,
I have earned this right.
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My heart goes out to you Keesha but you clearly show great strength of character and determination and survival. Good for you and yes as you wrote you have earned the right to be what YOU want to be. 🤗
 
AZ Jim said:
i thought at one point that I knew my place in life, but after losing my wife of 48 years this Jan 30th I know longer do.
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Dear Jim, give it time, Both Kayelle and I lost our spouses after long marriages. We found a great site at the time to connect with others. Unfortunately, that site is gone, but there is another good site called http://widowedvillage.org/ and it is very good.
 
I'm just who I am....I'm lucky to still have my kids and their kids and a great husband....We both lost our parents....I still have a brother with his wife and kids and their kids....I do have some friends and at this time we just talk on line or on phone....I miss them dearly....
My brother came to see us this afternoon....We haven't seen him since last Christmas....We weren't home till June....It was great to see him..
When he left we pumped knuckles....hahaha....That was the first time in my life I had to do that....We always hug when we see each other....Sad..
Ok, I'm crying now....Be Well, Everyone here....♥
 
Whatever else I may have been, Caretaker seems to have become the major theme in my life.

At 16, I moved in with my grandfather after my grandmother died. I cooked and cleaned and listened to his many and varied complaints. My mother was scandalized when he moved his girlfriend in a year later, but I was the happiest kid in town!. As it turned out, I helped care for the GF when she got sick, and I was with her when she died.

My first husband died of a rare neurological condition at age 41, and I had cared for him at home for years. He had become paralyzed from the chest area down, so it was a lot of work.

I remarried 2 years later, and helped care for my husband's parents in their final illnesses. I cared for my own mother, and then moved my dad into my house with hospice care when he was dying.

My second husband became ill in 2015, 2 bouts of cancer, and I cared for him until he passed away in March.

And what did I do for work? Well...I was a counselor in the state mental health system for years. And then I worked in a doctor's office.

Not long ago, I was playing a game with some friends. The idea was to define another person in just one word. They were getting words like "flirty" and "sassy" and "princess". So, what word did I get? "Capable."

And yes, I think that just about sums up my role in life.
 

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