hollydolly
SF VIP
- Location
- London England
You may have seen this before...and tbf this person did only visit mainly the smaller towns and villages where everyone is much more friendly and there's less crime but this pretty much sums up what life is like in Britain. Where he's got it wrong I'll have amended it in brackets...
I was in England again a few weeks ago, mostly in small towns, but here's some of what I learned:
* Almost everyone is very polite
* The food is generally outstanding
* There are no guns
* There are too many narrow stairs
* Everything is just a little bit different
* The pubs close too early ( they close at around 11.30pm in villages an up to 3am in towns)
* The reason they drive on the left is because all their cars are built backwards (lol)
* Pubs are not bars, they are community living rooms.
* You'd better like peas, potatoes and sausage ( not necessarily,,in fact I hate peas and can't remember the last time I had sausages)
*Refrigerators and washing machines are very small ( not VERY small just not Huge because our kitchens are smaller and most people don't have a utility or laundry room so the washer and dryer takes up space in the kitchen which could be used for a Big Fridge freezer )
* Everything is generally older, smaller and shorter ( we're a very old country)
* People don't seem to be afraid of their neighbors or the government (why would we be afraid of our neighbours) ?
* Their paper money makes sense, the coins don't
* Everyone has a washing machine but driers are rare (driers are not rare, almost everyone has one)
* Hot and cold water faucets. Remember them?
* Pants are called "trousers", underwear are "pants" and sweaters are "jumpers"
* The bathroom light is a string hanging from the ceiling ( true because it's illegal to have an electrical outlet in a small bathroom near water)
*"Fanny" is a naughty word, as is "shag"
* All the signs are well designed with beautiful typography and written in full sentences with proper grammar.
* There's no dress code (not true)
* Doors close by themselves, but they don't always open ( I have no idea what he means by this)
* They eat with their forks upside down
* The English are as crazy about their gardens as Americans are about cars
* They don't seem to use facecloths or napkins or maybe they’re just neater then we are ( yes we do)
* The wall outlets all have switches, some don't do anything
* There are hardly any cops or police cars ( true but that's only in small towns and villages, lots in the cities)
* When you do see police they seem to be in male & female pairs and often smiling
* Black people are just people: they didn't quite do slavery here
* Everything comes with chips, which are French fries. ( not true...in any way shape or form..chips are only served with food in a greasy joe cafe or downmarket pub unless you specifically ask not to have them)
* Cookies are "biscuits" and potato chips are "crisps"
* HP sauce is better than catsup
* Obama is considered a hero, Bush is considered an idiot, Trump, well, just don’t mention Trump (well I wouldn't say Obama was considered a hero exactly... )
* After fish and chips, curry is the most popular food
* The water controls in showers need detailed instructions ( only if you're a fool)
* They can have every electrical item on at the same time in their homes and the fuses won't blow
* Folks don't always lock their bikes ( yes but not in large towns and cities)
* It's not unusual to see people dressed different and speaking different languages
* Your electronic devices will work fine with just a plug adapter
* Nearly everyone is better educated than we are
* If someone buys you a drink you must do the same
* There are no guns
* Look right, walk left. Again; look right, walk left. You're welcome. ( errrm no idea )
* Avoid British wine and French beer but drink British beer and French wine
* It's not that hard to eat with the fork in your left hand with a little practice. If you don't, everyone knows you're an American
* Many of the roads are the size of our sidewalks and sidewalks are ‘pavements’.
* There's no AC (there is in shops and malls but not in the average house )
* Instead of turning the heat up, you put on a jumper
* Gas is "petrol", it costs about $6 a gallon and is sold by the liter ( have to update this, it now costs approx £6 per gallon $8.00 USD equivalent)
* If you speed on a motorway, you get a ticket. Period. Always
* You don't have to tip, really!
* Scotland, Wales and Ireland really are different countries
* Only 14% of Americans have a passport, everyone in the UK does ( almost everyone)
* You pay the price marked on products because the taxes (VAT) are built in
Walking is the national pastime
* Their TV looks and sounds much better than ours
* They call their TV “the telly”
* They took the street signs down during WWII, but haven't put them all back up yet ( what the heck?..was he drunk when he wrote this) lol
* Everyone enjoys a good joke
* There are no guns
* Dogs are very well behaved and welcome everywhere
* There are no window screens
* You can get on a bus and end up in Paris
* Everyone knows more about our history than we do
* Radio is still a big deal. The BBC is quite good
* The newspapers can be awful
* Everything costs the same but our money is worth less so you have to add 50% to the price to figure what you're paying
* Beer comes in large, completely filled, actual pint glasses and the closer the brewery the better the beer
* Butter and eggs aren't refrigerated
* The beer isn't warm, each style is served at the proper temperature
* Cider (alcoholic) is quite good.
* Excess cider consumption can be very painful.
* The universal greeting is "Cheers" (pronounced "cheeahz" unless you are from Cornwall, then it's "chairz")
* The money is easy to understand: 1-2-5-10-20-50 pence, then-£1-£2-£5-£10, etc bills. There are no quarters.
* Their cash makes ours look like Monopoly money
* Cars don't have bumper stickers
* Many doorknobs, buildings and tools are older than America
* By law, there are no crappy, old cars
* When the sign says something was built in 456, they didn't lose the "1"
* Cake is pudding, ice cream is pudding, anything served for dessert is pudding, even pudding
* BBC4 is NPR
* Everything closes by 1800 (6pm) ( absolutely not true even our supermakets are open 24 hours a day)
* Very few people smoke, those who do often roll their own ( not true but lots more people Vape tho)
* You're defined by your accent
* No one in Cornwall knows what the hell a Cornish Game Hen is ( nope no idea , what the heck is it someone tell me)
* Soccer is a religion, religion is a sport
* Europeans dress better then the British, we dress worse
* The trains work: a 10 minute delay is regrettable
* Drinks don't come with ice
* There are far fewer fat English people
* There are a lot of healthy old folks around participating in life instead of hiding at home watching TV
* If you're over 60, you get free bus passes and reduced rail travel passes
* Displaying your political or religious affiliation is considered very bad taste
* Every pub has a pet drunk
* Their healthcare works, but they still bitch about it
* Cake is one of the major food groups
* Their coffee is mediocre but their tea is wonderful
* There are still no guns
* Towel warmers!
* Cheers
I was in England again a few weeks ago, mostly in small towns, but here's some of what I learned:
* Almost everyone is very polite
* The food is generally outstanding
* There are no guns
* There are too many narrow stairs
* Everything is just a little bit different
* The pubs close too early ( they close at around 11.30pm in villages an up to 3am in towns)
* The reason they drive on the left is because all their cars are built backwards (lol)
* Pubs are not bars, they are community living rooms.
* You'd better like peas, potatoes and sausage ( not necessarily,,in fact I hate peas and can't remember the last time I had sausages)
*Refrigerators and washing machines are very small ( not VERY small just not Huge because our kitchens are smaller and most people don't have a utility or laundry room so the washer and dryer takes up space in the kitchen which could be used for a Big Fridge freezer )
* Everything is generally older, smaller and shorter ( we're a very old country)
* People don't seem to be afraid of their neighbors or the government (why would we be afraid of our neighbours) ?
* Their paper money makes sense, the coins don't
* Everyone has a washing machine but driers are rare (driers are not rare, almost everyone has one)
* Hot and cold water faucets. Remember them?
* Pants are called "trousers", underwear are "pants" and sweaters are "jumpers"
* The bathroom light is a string hanging from the ceiling ( true because it's illegal to have an electrical outlet in a small bathroom near water)
*"Fanny" is a naughty word, as is "shag"
* All the signs are well designed with beautiful typography and written in full sentences with proper grammar.
* There's no dress code (not true)
* Doors close by themselves, but they don't always open ( I have no idea what he means by this)
* They eat with their forks upside down
* The English are as crazy about their gardens as Americans are about cars
* They don't seem to use facecloths or napkins or maybe they’re just neater then we are ( yes we do)
* The wall outlets all have switches, some don't do anything
* There are hardly any cops or police cars ( true but that's only in small towns and villages, lots in the cities)
* When you do see police they seem to be in male & female pairs and often smiling
* Black people are just people: they didn't quite do slavery here
* Everything comes with chips, which are French fries. ( not true...in any way shape or form..chips are only served with food in a greasy joe cafe or downmarket pub unless you specifically ask not to have them)
* Cookies are "biscuits" and potato chips are "crisps"
* HP sauce is better than catsup
* Obama is considered a hero, Bush is considered an idiot, Trump, well, just don’t mention Trump (well I wouldn't say Obama was considered a hero exactly... )
* After fish and chips, curry is the most popular food
* The water controls in showers need detailed instructions ( only if you're a fool)
* They can have every electrical item on at the same time in their homes and the fuses won't blow
* Folks don't always lock their bikes ( yes but not in large towns and cities)
* It's not unusual to see people dressed different and speaking different languages
* Your electronic devices will work fine with just a plug adapter
* Nearly everyone is better educated than we are
* If someone buys you a drink you must do the same
* There are no guns
* Look right, walk left. Again; look right, walk left. You're welcome. ( errrm no idea )
* Avoid British wine and French beer but drink British beer and French wine
* It's not that hard to eat with the fork in your left hand with a little practice. If you don't, everyone knows you're an American
* Many of the roads are the size of our sidewalks and sidewalks are ‘pavements’.
* There's no AC (there is in shops and malls but not in the average house )
* Instead of turning the heat up, you put on a jumper
* Gas is "petrol", it costs about $6 a gallon and is sold by the liter ( have to update this, it now costs approx £6 per gallon $8.00 USD equivalent)
* If you speed on a motorway, you get a ticket. Period. Always
* You don't have to tip, really!
* Scotland, Wales and Ireland really are different countries
* Only 14% of Americans have a passport, everyone in the UK does ( almost everyone)
* You pay the price marked on products because the taxes (VAT) are built in
Walking is the national pastime
* Their TV looks and sounds much better than ours
* They call their TV “the telly”
* They took the street signs down during WWII, but haven't put them all back up yet ( what the heck?..was he drunk when he wrote this) lol
* Everyone enjoys a good joke
* There are no guns
* Dogs are very well behaved and welcome everywhere
* There are no window screens
* You can get on a bus and end up in Paris
* Everyone knows more about our history than we do
* Radio is still a big deal. The BBC is quite good
* The newspapers can be awful
* Everything costs the same but our money is worth less so you have to add 50% to the price to figure what you're paying
* Beer comes in large, completely filled, actual pint glasses and the closer the brewery the better the beer
* Butter and eggs aren't refrigerated
* The beer isn't warm, each style is served at the proper temperature
* Cider (alcoholic) is quite good.
* Excess cider consumption can be very painful.
* The universal greeting is "Cheers" (pronounced "cheeahz" unless you are from Cornwall, then it's "chairz")
* The money is easy to understand: 1-2-5-10-20-50 pence, then-£1-£2-£5-£10, etc bills. There are no quarters.
* Their cash makes ours look like Monopoly money
* Cars don't have bumper stickers
* Many doorknobs, buildings and tools are older than America
* By law, there are no crappy, old cars
* When the sign says something was built in 456, they didn't lose the "1"
* Cake is pudding, ice cream is pudding, anything served for dessert is pudding, even pudding
* BBC4 is NPR
* Everything closes by 1800 (6pm) ( absolutely not true even our supermakets are open 24 hours a day)
* Very few people smoke, those who do often roll their own ( not true but lots more people Vape tho)
* You're defined by your accent
* No one in Cornwall knows what the hell a Cornish Game Hen is ( nope no idea , what the heck is it someone tell me)
* Soccer is a religion, religion is a sport
* Europeans dress better then the British, we dress worse
* The trains work: a 10 minute delay is regrettable
* Drinks don't come with ice
* There are far fewer fat English people
* There are a lot of healthy old folks around participating in life instead of hiding at home watching TV
* If you're over 60, you get free bus passes and reduced rail travel passes
* Displaying your political or religious affiliation is considered very bad taste
* Every pub has a pet drunk
* Their healthcare works, but they still bitch about it
* Cake is one of the major food groups
* Their coffee is mediocre but their tea is wonderful
* There are still no guns
* Towel warmers!
* Cheers
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