Many Women Will Never See Justice in This Lifetime

Della said:
Another fun non-statistical fact is the one Vintage Better just made up about how men who don't buy condoms CANNOT BE FATHERS.

Somehow in her world men who don't bother to buy condoms are huge losers, but women who don't bother to buy any sort of birth control are sad victims of the big bad men.

Why do we infantilize women like this? Women are capable of controlling their own bodies!
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No - the statement Vintage Better made is not a fact, non statistical or otherwise.

It is an opinion, not a fact.

Not saying I do or do not agree with it.

Men are capable of controlling themselves too - we shouldn't infantalize them either- they are not infants with no responsibility in this.
 

January said:
Men are capable of controlling themselves too - we shouldn't infantalize them either- they are not infants with no responsibility in this.
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I agree, 100%. Men should use birth control. I just think women should, too, because she has the most to lose if his method fails.
 
Never trusted a man in terms of birth control. My body, me, took care of myself first. Responsibility ALL MINE. ALL. That way, I know I'm safe, I take, took, care of me.

Before my mother died I was blessed to have a conversation with her where we hashed out Everything in my life. During this, I asked "Ma, did you and Dad ever worry I would have gotten pregnant?"

Bless her answer, Bless my mother. She replied, "No, Pepper. WE KNEW YOU WEREN'T STUPID."
 

Pepper said:
Never trusted a man in terms of birth control. My body, me, took care of myself first. Responsibility ALL MINE. ALL. That way, I know I'm safe, I take, took, care of me.

Before my mother died I was blessed to have a conversation with her where we hashed out Everything in my life. During this, I asked "Ma, did you and Dad ever worry I would have gotten pregnant?"

Bless her answer, Bless my mother. She replied, "No, Pepper. WE KNEW YOU WEREN'T STUPID."
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Your mother was so right. sure men should use protection, but when it comes to a young woman's own body and her much higher risks, she should trust no one but herself.

This is not the time to stomp her foot and demand that he take full responsibility. "He said he had it taken care of," are famous last words before she goes into the delivery room.

She can assert her feminist views in other ways, like making him do the housework.
 
One thing I've noticed first-hand experience is that men who claim they never wanted the kid(s) in the first darn place, and that the mother should've take more (or all) responsibility to keep from getting pregnant ("It wasn't my fault, it was hers" bla bla bla) are so eager to have that kid (or one of those kids) take care (financially, butt-wiping, etc.) of him when he's old. I've seen that over and over.
 
It's a bit late in life to be pissing and moaning about this stuff. Most of you have been functionally sterile since your 40s and completely barren since your 50s.

Are you living in a fantasy land or is this just one more excuse for a self-indulgent orgy of misandry?
 
dilettante said:
It's a bit late in life to be pissing and moaning about this stuff. Most of you have been functionally sterile since your 40s and completely barren since your 50s.

Are you living in a fantasy land or is this just one more excuse for a self-indulgent orgy of misandry?
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You don't have to do this. You don't have to be an AHole. You have wit & intelligence & life experience and my wish for you is to use those gifts better. From the heart, @dilettante. What I said is coming from a good place for you. I'm not condemning you, don't think for one second that I am.
 
dadjunk said:
My daughters are 56 and 51 and our message to them was that you must always be in a position to be OK on your own. Get educated and find rewarding employment prior to romance. Always have a plan B. If parents aren't teaching that to their daughters they are failing them. I personally will never stop watching out for my daughters and granddaughters although I do that from a non-interfering distance.
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Somehow I missed much of this thread. I totally agree with the philosophy you raised your daughters by and that parents who neglect to instill that in their daughters are doing them a disservice. The days of "find a husband to take care of you" should long be over. My grandmother used to say to me "be independent". And she'd emphasize it just like that. The women in my family were just that, even though they had husbands. I was always that way too.
 
carouselsilver said:
I remember that! It came just in time when I left my abusive husband and had to find work. I even qualified for a program to subsidize daycare payments so that I could afford them. It was truly a blessing!
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I'm so sorry to read that you suffered abuse at the hands of your (ex?) husband. I'm glad you found a way to get help and get out.
 
“In republics, persons elevated from the mass of the community, by the suffrages of their fellow-citizens, to stations of great pre-eminence and power, may find compensations for betraying their trust, which, to any but minds animated and guided by superior virtue, may appear to exceed the proportion of interest they have in the common stock, and to overbalance the obligations of duty.
Hence it is that history furnishes us with so many mortifying examples of the prevalency of foreign corruption in republican governments.”
–Alexander Hamilton, “The Same Subject Continued: Other Defects of the Present Confederation”, Federalist No. 22, December 14, 1787
 
This is not about gender, but it’s kind of the same point. Some of us are old enough to remember boys and girls who were victims of the horrible polio epidemics before there were vaccines for that disease. Some died (one girl in my class did) and many lived in iron lungs, or spent the rest of their lives in wheelchairs. Some were horribly disfigured.
We all pretty much forgot about polio, thank God, once we had the vaccines. So what happens now, if the vaccines are made illegal? Wouldn’t that be “unfair” to the future children of both genders?
Any action, legal, social, economic, or whatever that knowingly harms another person regardless of gender, is unfair.
 
Sunny said:
This is not about gender, but it’s kind of the same point. Some of us are old enough to remember boys and girls who were victims of the horrible polio epidemics before there were vaccines for that disease. Some died (one girl in my class did) and many lived in iron lungs, or spent the rest of their lives in wheelchairs. Some were horribly disfigured.
We all pretty much forgot about polio, thank God, once we had the vaccines. So what happens now, if the vaccines are made illegal? Wouldn’t that be “unfair” to the future children of both genders?
Any action, legal, social, economic, or whatever that knowingly harms another person regardless of gender, is unfair.
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What makes you think vaccines will be made illegal?? Is that what people are saying?
 
Looking at the title of this thread I thought of girls and women (because they are what this thread is about)) who were sexually assaulted and assaulted many many times and as a result acquired PTSD many severely to the point of not being able to function in this society and some even put in mental institutions forever or repeatedly .

Many or even most of them way too fearful to go after their assailants. Fear of retaliation and revictimization . Many having to live in poverty or substandard living situations because they cannot function in a societal job. Never to have a real life of being "free" because they are imprisoned by severe trauma and mental illness. Many, many never see justice.

Yes there are some who also recover as much as possible and gain independence and a career . The majority of the severely traumatized don't.
 
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