They say "Men marry their mothers" "Daughters marry their dad " ....

Toomuchstuff

Toomuchstuff

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Location
Wisconsin
I've heard this saying for so long .... that sons marry someone like their mom ... and daughters marry someone like their dad .

I used to laugh at that , until I did some thinking . I did marry someone so much like my dad . My hubby married me and I was so much like his mom. My son married a lady who is so much like me . I wonder if there's something to this thought ~~~~~~~~~~ !
 

I feel it depends on the relationship with your mother or father, if it wasn't good in your opinion, you may marry or be attracted to someone with different/opposite traits
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I think it's often true to an extent, like Merlin said- if the relationship was good.

What is so sad is when girls are abused by fathers, they sometimes marry the same kind of man, believing that's the way things are "supposed" to be, or believes she doesn't deserve any better.
 
I don't know - - - My wife was totally different than my mom but I have loved them both dearly. Mom's been gone for 53 years now and my wife and I have been together for 64, married for 62 of those years.
 
I had a fiance who was just like my dad and did not marry him because of that. Though he shared many of my dad's good qualities he also had all of his negative qualities. Eventually I chose a man completely different. It was a much better match, but he died. My ex fiance is still alive and still single I'm not surprised. Nor am I tempted.
 
I am nothing like my husband's mother was, and although I had a good father and loved him very much, my husband of 40+ years who I ultimately love, is nothing like my dad was. So in our case, it's not true.
 
Actually, I've heard this, but in a different way. "If you want to see what your wife/husband will be like in 30 or 40 years, just look at Her Mother, or His Father...and you can probably predict with a high degree of accuracy what kind of spouse you will be living with in a few decades".
 
I think there is something in this proposition, and I doubt people can actually "learn" not to follow this path, because whomsoever we might fall in love with comes largely from our subconscious doesn't it.
 
My first husband was not like my dad except he was loyal as was my dad. My second husband was nothing like my dad. My dad was a good man but of course had his problems.
 
Toomuchstuff said:
I've heard this saying for so long .... that sons marry someone like their mom ... and daughters marry someone like their dad .

I used to laugh at that , until I did some thinking . I did marry someone so much like my dad . My hubby married me and I was so much like his mom. My son married a lady who is so much like me . I wonder if there's something to this thought ~~~~~~~~~~ !
Click to expand...

OK, so most of the people from our parent's age likely grew up in a similar culture to your in laws. So the person you married might have similar characteristics as your father/mother. There are some things that come back around in children. Children often return to the religion of their parents. On the other hand, if you were born into one of the three major religions. There is not very far to run. Also, as we age and have children we find ourselves saying the same things to our kids as our parents said to us.

Given the circumstances of helping your children survive what else are you going to say? Of course your kids have the same problems that you did. There are also genetic similarities. When you put all these things together you say things like, "Dad I told him the same things you used to tell me and it did not make any difference. He went out and did it anyway."
 
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