Is Anyone Living Independently on Their Own in Their Senior Years?

The TOD and POD route is so much better, and avoids probate. I've done the same thing.

And, as someone else up thread said, I don't think about "my kids' inheritance." If there's $$ left when I'm gone, fine. If not, then that's the way it is. I"m not spending it on wild trips to the French Riviera, but I'll spend what I need to live comfortably on.
 

Good for you Butterfly. I talked to my accountant about my plans to spend down to X amount of dollars, after thinking about it she said you will be fine with that. She was my neighbor for 25 years and my accountant for most of those years.
 
TOD is transfer on death for property and autos, POD is pay on death for for money, cds, etc. The heir takes a death certificate in and the money is transferred to that person. If the moneys are not tax deferred there are no taxes to be paid at that time.
 
I would like to move to a retirement community because I feel the opportunities to socialize would be significantly better than where I am currently living. I'd also like a place with organized fitness programs. Most of the retirement communities expect you to eat at least one meal in the community dining room. But this is a big problem for me. I take my diet VERY seriously, low carb, organic veggies, no processed foods, no wheat, no sugar, bone broth, only wild caught fish, only pasture raised beef. . . .yeah I'm a real nut case. I'm sure there are other seniors as weird as I am about food, but as of the present I don't know of any suitable arrangements.
 
Josiah, you are missing out on so much, Pizza, pizza, pizza.............and cheese burgers.
 
Vala said:
Josiah, you are missing out on so much, Pizza, pizza, pizza.............and cheese burgers.
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The very strict diet I'm on could in the hands of a very good cook still be remarkably satisfying and tasty. I'm not a good cook, barely a competent one. What I have done is to hire a woman who is pretty good in the kitchen to prepare meals for me which are compliant with my diet. This has worked out reasonably well. Vala, I don't have many virtues and missing out on junk food is about all I have to hang my hat on.
 
Even if you have decent kids, odds are they are going to be too busy to attend to your needs and check in on you very often - even if they have good intentions. They will try, but it's not the frequency / close monitoring that someone unable to care for themselves needs.
 
SeaBreeze said:
Is anyone in a situation where maybe your spouse passed on, and you're completely on your own with no help from relatives, children, etc.? I think many older people make it okay living alone in their homes in their golden years. I sometimes talk with my husband about if one of us died, since we have no children or relatives close by to help if needed. We'd have to make the decision to have someone come in from the outside to help with chores, housework, personal help if we were physically unable. My worst fear is being mentally disabled, like suffering with Alzheimer's, guess someone would come in and make that decision for me, and put me in a home. Anyone having to do this, and is living comfortably and independently on their own?
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I will be on my own soon. I am staying with my sis just temporarily. I am used to being alone, and I know I can get through things now. It's scarey sometimes, but usually I just know I have to face things as they come. I don't worry much. The thing that scares me worse than anything is losing people I care about. I make friends/acquaintances easily, and I am moving where there will be lots of friends. I guess I think I'll live forever and my friends will all go before me. I did ok in my life and have enough to live on, and since I am not materialistic anyway, it's been easy to adjust to low income;) I like not having a bunch of "stuff". Just so I can up and go if I want;) I really think I come from a long line of gypsies;) hugs, denise
 
I live alone in a very large house out of which I continue to operate a business selling collectible books. The house is also loaded with antiques and pieces of art inherited through my wife's family. I hope to divest all of this in the next year or so and move into a small apartment. I would like to relocate to an different location but this will entail moving my wife from the nursing home she now resides in to another facility. This is all doable, I just have to get my ass in gear and do it.
 
At least you have those choices goin on Josiah! I found my place I want to retire right through Senior Forums, another member:) People I know here in my home area give me a hard time and say, "why" "you won't know anyone there", or, you don't know the area. If people like where they are, wonderful!! But there are options for us, we just need to research it and like you said, get off our ass and do it;)

I love where I'm going, more sunshine, less rain, I will have a beautiful apartment with all I need (and it has solar panels, yeehaw) a wonderful town to explore with tons of activities for seniors (they say it's a senior town!!). Ok, gettin way too excited, but I can't let people drag me down and say, oh you should do this or that. Preconceived ideas of what we can and can't do, bs to that;)

one more thing, it's on a Lake, and I LOVE to kayak, and have one. The Lake is 3 blocks from where I'll be living;)
 
Denise, I think that it is wonderful that you have found the place where you want to live, and even though you don't know anyone there yet; it sounds like just the kind of a place where you will be able to make friends with other seniors living in the area. maybe even one with a kayak ?
I really enjoyed my kayak when I had one, so I know how much fun they can be.
At one time, I also had one of those little square blue pedal boats, and it was great for fishing. I pedaled it with my feet, and actually steered with the pedals, too; so it was easy to have the fishing pole and pedal along and fish. Sometimes, I would catch a nice Kokanee for dinner, and that was even better !
Today, I was thinking about the little square pedal boat, and looking them up online, and they have stream-lined them to look like a regular boat, and they now go farther and faster than the old ones, and some are designed for just one person.
Of course, we are not even going to talk about the price of one of these awesome pedal boats.
Just say, on my income, it might just as well be a yacht.
 
OHMYgosh, isn't it so cool HFL!! I loved your story, and the best part of getting to use one of these types, is the leg exercise!! I hear you on the dough though, lol, my kayak is a cheapy handed down to me by my sister's boyfriend at the time;) I don't know how I'll store it where I'm going (apartments with little storage you know) but I may get to keep it, who knows. The Lake has a lot of public access, unlike some that are all bought up by homeowners. Seems they've managed to maintain areas for everyone, love that. You can be sure I'll be at the city meetings etc.;) I don't think there is even a Mall there, hope not;)

Anyway, I know it won't all be perfect, but it is atleast a real opportunity, and yes, the best part will be the other seniors, especially my friends that live down there, and the people I will meet in my building;) hugs, denise
 
Sounds good Denise and you will make friends quickly because you come across as a very
friendly and outgoing person here on the forum.
How far is it from your sister's home and when do you think you will be moving, if you don't mind
me asking.
 
You know what's funny about that little paddle boat, is I can just see me out there with all those lovely sailboats, LOL!! Since this book I'm reading that has an amateur sleuth, and she says LOL stands for little old lady, LOL, I'm thinking, little old lady coming in paddle boat, get the hell outa my way, LOLLLLLL!!
 
Raven said:
Sounds good Denise and you will make friends quickly because you come across as a very
friendly and outgoing person here on the forum.
How far is it from your sister's home and when do you think you will be moving, if you don't mind
me asking.
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Hi Raven,

Yes, I'll be 8 hours from my sis. We don't have a lot in common and rarely do things together. She has her thing and I have mine. We can't care for each other if one gets sick so that isn't feasible to think about. So, I am not concerned about moving from my home-area. My family is spread out, and we rarely gather together. We enjoy each other most, at a distance;)

Not sure on the move date just yet;) hugs, denise

PS to anyone in the thread reading this, I have it all set up with some folks in Alaska for when I can't take care of myself any longer. They will put me on an iceberg, and give me a shove. If I can get internet, I will login and say hey;) denise.gif
 
Denise, I wish you all the best in your move.
Keep us up to date as you have a lot of friends here who are interested in your
daily goings on and in the new location and surroundings when you get there.

Brrrrr, it looks very cold on that iceberg.
:winter1:
 
Raven said:
Denise, I wish you all the best in your move.
Keep us up to date as you have a lot of friends here who are interested in your
daily goings on and in the new location and surroundings when you get there.

Brrrrr, it looks very cold on that iceberg.
:winter1:
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LOL, I'll keep you guys posted;) It's going to be quite a journey at this age, things use to be so simple for me but now, well, quite an adventure, but I really can't wait;) When I think of "my song" or the one that fits me best I always think of "Still Crazy after all These Years" LOL;)
 
My dad is 94, still lives on the farm, still works harder that a lot of younger people, and still is very independent. My mother passed away last summer.

Most of the land is now leased out, but he maintains a few acres, runs a dozen or so head of cattle, works on equipment, mows, and does all the other farm "chores" as needed. He needs help with paperwork type things-he's never had a head for paperwork so now my wife and I are helping him manage finances, explaining the bills that need to be paid, etc. That was all stuff my mother took care of before she died. Occasionally he uses a cane because of an ankle injury many years ago.

I wouldn't even consider asking him if he wants to "retire". It's a word that isn't in his vocabulary, and he truly loves what he's doing. My guess is that if for some reason he couldn't keep working like he does, he'd fade away pretty fast.
 
Like some of you, I live alone, relying on a cat and a dog for company, and the internet and TV for entertainment. I have been alone since 1992, and at first it was hard, but I got used to it. But now that I am nearly 70, I am starting to lose some mobility and endurance. I can't work 8 hours or 10 hours a day like I used to a few years ago, and it's hard for me to do the yard work and other chores around the house. Fortunately, when I built this house I got steel siding and a steel roof so there isn't any maintenance like painting.

Where I live, there aren't any teenage boys I can hire to do the yard work, shovel snow, or carry groceries in, so I do it myself. I've had an eye on moving into town and getting an apartment, but after four years of trying, I'm still unable to sell my home (the market here is TERRIBLE). I've spent a lot of time worrying about this, but since I can't solve this problem, I've had to let it go.

I have long-term care insurance, but I expect that heart disease will get me rather than a disabling condition that's longer-lasting. My daughter and I have advance health care directives naming each other, and I have signed a power of attorney for her that my lawyer keeps in his office, should I become incapacitated. My most serious issue is the health of my ex, part of whose pensions I receive while he is living. When he goes, I will be up the creek without a paddle.
 
DoItMyself said:
My dad is 94, still lives on the farm, still works harder that a lot of younger people, and still is very independent. My mother passed away last summer.

Most of the land is now leased out, but he maintains a few acres, runs a dozen or so head of cattle, works on equipment, mows, and does all the other farm "chores" as needed. He needs help with paperwork type things-he's never had a head for paperwork so now my wife and I are helping him manage finances, explaining the bills that need to be paid, etc. That was all stuff my mother took care of before she died. Occasionally he uses a cane because of an ankle injury many years ago.

I wouldn't even consider asking him if he wants to "retire". It's a word that isn't in his vocabulary, and he truly loves what he's doing. My guess is that if for some reason he couldn't keep working like he does, he'd fade away pretty fast.
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Geesh, too bad he and Alice, my friend that's 94, don't hook up. They sound like they were separated at birth. She own 400 acres over in my hometown area where she has a neat huge house. She still gets in her jeep and patrols the property, check things out;) She's really lovely too, she is tall, slim and beautiful white hair she keeps shoulder length in a perm;) Staying active sure makes a difference, good for your dad too;)
 
DoItMyself said:
My dad is 94, still lives on the farm, still works harder that a lot of younger people, and still is very independent. My mother passed away last summer.

Most of the land is now leased out, but he maintains a few acres, runs a dozen or so head of cattle, works on equipment, mows, and does all the other farm "chores" as needed. He needs help with paperwork type things-he's never had a head for paperwork so now my wife and I are helping him manage finances, explaining the bills that need to be paid, etc. That was all stuff my mother took care of before she died. Occasionally he uses a cane because of an ankle injury many years ago.

I wouldn't even consider asking him if he wants to "retire". It's a word that isn't in his vocabulary, and he truly loves what he's doing. My guess is that if for some reason he couldn't keep working like he does, he'd fade away pretty fast.
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It sounds like your father is doing very well at the age of 94, that's wonderful. My condolences to both of you for the loss of your mother. It is good if you're working for yourself too, as opposed to punching a clock and working for a stranger. I wish your Dad the best in his future, kudos to you and your wife for helping him out now that he's alone. :love_heart:
 
I have a similar attitude as you Debby when it comes to one's money. I have no children, but I have a niece and a nephew. I hear from my nephew once every 5 to 7 years and my niece only when she needs money. I used to think about leaving them something, but since they have never treated me like an aunt at all, will use whatever I have earned/saved over the years to pay for my own care. Anything left I will donate to St Judes or for Alzheimer's research.
 
LogicsHere said:
I have a similar attitude as you Debby when it comes to one's money. I have no children, but I have a niece and a nephew. I hear from my nephew once every 5 to 7 years and my niece only when she needs money. I used to think about leaving them something, but since they have never treated me like an aunt at all, will use whatever I have earned/saved over the years to pay for my own care. Anything left I will donate to St Judes or for Alzheimer's research.
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I'm glad to hear that logics, I couldn't agree with you more;)
 
I've been living on my own for nearly 5 years, since my husband died. We have three children and six grandkids, living spread out all over the U.S. When we retired (in our 50's), we moved from Maryland to the Pacific Northwest, which we had fallen in love with. None of our children were within 1000 miles. We happily lived there for 18 years. When my husband became disabled, we realized we had to live near one of our kids, so we decided to return to Maryland. We moved to Leisure World, a 55+ community for independent seniors - not "assisted living," just limited to seniors. It's suburban and very nicely landscaped, built around a golf course. There are tons of activities here, and a big variety of houses and apartments to choose from. I've been glad to have the support network of all my friends here, and my son is about 20 minutes away. It is possible to manage by oneself in a planned community like this, even without children, but obviously his being here and his willingness to help make it a lot easier for me. I do get to see my daughters fairly often also.

One thing everyone should have is long term care insurance. No one likes to think about needing care near the end of life, but many people do, and in this country, it's horrendously expensive. If you don't have it, look into getting it.
 

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