What's With All This Sexual Harassment Stuff Going On?

I believe that people have the right to lay down the rules. IMO we need to remove sex and sexual innuendo from advertising, we need to rethink the objectification and display of little girls and young women, we need to have age appropriate sex education in schools that goes well beyond the mechanics of sex and deals with relationships what is and isn't appropriate, etc...

I think it will take a generation or two and millions of funerals before any lasting changes can be made in this area.

After all what can you really do to change a 93 year old bottom pinching President like George H.W. Bush, it's who he is. Lord knows we all have one in the family that makes a fool of themselves at family gatherings. Hopefully they will all be replaced with better educated more respectful young people.
 

I don’t buy for a moment that men are undisciplined apes, caught in perpetual servitude to raging testosterone. Inappropriate behaviour is a choice, a very poor one. A real man, according to my Sifu, takes responsibility for his actions, and treats women with respect regardless of their apparel. I couldn’t agree more. As for the Russians, they recently passed a law stating that domestic violence toward women no longer exists. Yikes. Putin has been very frank regarding his opinion regarding the

“weakness” of women. Society has rules regarding behaviour. Some of these rules are set down in the criminal code. They apply to men and women. Men and women both have a right to “lay down the rules” where it pertains to their safety, as well as an expectation of being treated with respect. Men also suffer abuse. Interesting that those who call women out for expecting men to adhere to a certain standard are often quick to invoke widespread blame towards female victims. Why it is so difficult to

grasp that victims of either gender are reluctant to come forward at the time of abuse when the power dynamic is what it is, is boggling. It reeks of entitlement. If that attitude remains entrenched among the general populace, imagine the narcissism rife among the rich and powerful?
 
AZ Jim said:
BobF represents a view that unfortunately has come to reflect all men's opinions and nothing could be further from the truth. It is a view that I hope is in it's death throes. I have more I want to say but I also do not want the ban hammer so I'll leave it at that.
Click to expand...

Thank you.
 

Aunt Bea said:
I believe that people have the right to lay down the rules. IMO we need to remove sex and sexual innuendo from advertising, we need to rethink the objectification and display of little girls and young women, we need to have age appropriate sex education in schools that goes well beyond the mechanics of sex and deals with relationships what is and isn't appropriate, etc...

I think it will take a generation or two and millions of funerals before any lasting changes can be made in this area.

After all what can you really do to change a 93 year old bottom pinching President like George H.W. Bush, it's who he is. Lord knows we all have one in the family that makes a fool of themselves at family gatherings. Hopefully they will all be replaced with better educated more respectful young people.
Click to expand...


Yes! My son, 35, would never behave in such a fashion toward any woman, nor would his friends. He is married to a lawyer, very strong lady. He has always treated women as equals rather than sex objects. I think it is important to recognise that many men, not just young men, have the greatest respect toward women.
 
rgp said:
A woman cannot dictate how a man will react...and women in general have no right to lay down the rules. "Unwanted touching" is indeed assault AT THE TIME of the assault....not ten years later. "leering" and "commenting" in what ever manner is nothing more than perhaps boorish behavior not criminal....or against any rules.
Click to expand...
I have every right to lay down rules about how men will interact with me. That is how a man knows my boundaries and what is unwanted touching. I'm not talking about criminality because the law covers that. I am talking about day to day interactions between the sexes.
 
Aunt Bea said:
I believe that people have the right to lay down the rules. IMO we need to remove sex and sexual innuendo from advertising, we need to rethink the objectification and display of little girls and young women, we need to have age appropriate sex education in schools that goes well beyond the mechanics of sex and deals with relationships what is and isn't appropriate, etc...

I think it will take a generation or two and millions of funerals before any lasting changes can be made in this area.

After all what can you really do to change a 93 year old bottom pinching President like George H.W. Bush, it's who he is. Lord knows we all have one in the family that makes a fool of themselves at family gatherings. Hopefully they will all be replaced with better educated more respectful young people.
Click to expand...

Aunt Bea, I hope you're aware that George H.W. Bush had a number of quite public affairs, and he was known to reward the women afterward with excellent public sector jobs. His bottom-pinching didn't suddenly begin when he was 93.
 
Shalimar said:
I shall tell you a little secret about women. Sometimes, we dress for ourselves, to celebrate our femininity. It isn’t always about men.
Click to expand...

Well thanks for that. In a female only society.

Anyway. All I'm trying to find out is at what stage I am no longer funny and become a pig.

I could never figure that out. One guy tells a joke and the girls all laugh. Another guy tells the same joke and he's a pig.
 
Camper6 said:
Well thanks for that. In a female only society.

Anyway. All I'm trying to find out is at what stage I am no longer funny and become a pig.

I could never figure that out. One guy tells a joke and the girls all laugh. Another guy tells the same joke and he's a pig.
Click to expand...
Regarding humour, perhaps it depends on the company one keeps. Many times, women prefer to keep a low profile and laugh at inappropriate jokes rather than stir the pot and risk censure. “In a female only society.” I don’t see the relevance —women can celebrate their femininity regardless of the gender of other people. It is about our sovereignty as human beings which is not dependent on the opinion of men. Our self esteem is not predicated on male acceptance.
 
You are missing the point. Can you tell me what is the point of dressing that way if they are not trying to attract attention?
Click to expand...

Camper, I am afraid it is you who are missing the point. As I pointed out above, who is to say what mode of dress is going to turn some guy on? At one time, skirts shorter than ankle length were considered shockingly
improper. Where do we draw the line, and who gets to decide when the line has been crossed? You, Camper? Or do we assign a Clothing Propriety Police Squad?

I agree that dressing like a hooker, in extremely provocative clothing, is in ridiculously bad taste. I can even imagine that it might result in a woman being passed up for promotion, if she dresses that way all the time. But it is
NEVER an excuse for sexual assault (verbal or physical) against the woman. That is just blaming the victim.
 
Warrigal said:
I have every right to lay down rules about how men will interact with me. That is how a man knows my boundaries and what is unwanted touching. I'm not talking about criminality because the law covers that. I am talking about day to day interactions between the sexes.
Click to expand...



"I have every right to lay down rules about how men will interact with me. "

True, when it is physical.....
 
Sunny said:
Camper, I am afraid it is you who are missing the point. As I pointed out above, who is to say what mode of dress is going to turn some guy on? At one time, skirts shorter than ankle length were considered shockingly
improper. Where do we draw the line, and who gets to decide when the line has been crossed? You, Camper? Or do we assign a Clothing Propriety Police Squad?

I agree that dressing like a hooker, in extremely provocative clothing, is in ridiculously bad taste. I can even imagine that it might result in a woman being passed up for promotion, if she dresses that way all the time. But it is
NEVER an excuse for sexual assault (verbal or physical) against the woman. That is just blaming the victim.
Click to expand...
Absolutely.
 
Shalimar said:
I shall tell you a little secret about women. Sometimes, we dress for ourselves, to celebrate our femininity. It isn’t always about men.
Click to expand...


That is fine but......no matter the reason for the attire...any red-blooded American man is likely to notice...and admire at some level.

He may not be the one you want to notice, and he my be the buffoon that behaves badly....but that's just life. Holding your collective breath & stamping your feet will never change that.

Women as a whole need to remember one thing...they are no longer daddy's little girl, and as such, they do not always get their way.
 
Shalimar said:
There are guidelines for speech as well, verbal abuse is not acceptable for either sex.
Click to expand...

So who decides what "verbal abuse" is ?

If a man says,.. my she has a nice smile...that's OK ? But if he say's damn she has a nice set of boobs...he's a jerk?.....Both remarks are after all compliments.

And trust me...many / most women would not be offended if George Clooney noticed their boobs.
 
Camper6 said:
Anyway. All I'm trying to find out is at what stage I am no longer funny and become a pig.

I could never figure that out. One guy tells a joke and the girls all laugh. Another guy tells the same joke and he's a pig.
Click to expand...

I think we have all had those moments and the best policy is to keep our bawdy jokes, stories and observations to ourselves.

“It's better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt” - Mark Twain
 
Sunny said:
Camper, I am afraid it is you who are missing the point. As I pointed out above, who is to say what mode of dress is going to turn some guy on? At one time, skirts shorter than ankle length were considered shockingly
improper. Where do we draw the line, and who gets to decide when the line has been crossed? You, Camper? Or do we assign a Clothing Propriety Police Squad?

I agree that dressing like a hooker, in extremely provocative clothing, is in ridiculously bad taste. I can even imagine that it might result in a woman being passed up for promotion, if she dresses that way all the time. But it is
NEVER an excuse for sexual assault (verbal or physical) against the woman. That is just blaming the victim.
Click to expand...

I'm not talking about sexual assault. And I'm not missing the point either. I'm talking about the message being sent and then don't like the results.

What mode? Females set the mode. Posing for sexy advertising and then complain about it? It's hypocritical.
 
BobF said:
This touching and whatever by horny men is never the blame for the ladies that dress in seductive clothing and make up and act in teasing ways. Short and too tight skirts and crossed legs when sitting. Blouses that are cut all the way to the belt line. Baiting the males with dress and comments then crying to the management about comments and whistles and touching. As has recently turned out for one TV broadcaster it seemed almost to be a one way trip to being a millionaire.

In politics it has been used to reduce one parities strength in the Congress. Recently the opposing party has had a run on some of their Congressional persons. So now I expect that political tool for running 'bad' guys out of their jobs may have run its road and will now end.

Folks that have read my posts in the past know that I want 'parties' to be ignored in our Congress and make the elected use the Constitutions rules of electing as your electors have wanted. There is nothing in the Constitution that supports the party to be our directors at all.

Bottom line is that as long as their are seductive women and horny men there will be some not so nice things happening.

This is not saying that the courts should not protect the ladies from out of line men's actions or of allowing ladies to try to turn their efforts into dressing and acting such that men's actions do get aroused. This out of line activity does have more than just men chasing powerless women as some want to portray it. But that is also one way these things do happen.
Click to expand...


I was just wondering if you think it's alright for a man to grope or have a young girl in a room with him while he is naked. If of course she had a very short skirt on and a tight blouse. Would that give him permission because she was dressed provocatively
 
rgp said:
So who decides what "verbal abuse" is ?

If a man says,.. my she has a nice smile...that's OK ? But if he say's damn she has a nice set of boobs...he's a jerk?.....Both remarks are after all compliments.

And trust me...many / most women would not be offended if George Clooney noticed their boobs.
Click to expand...

Noticing breasts is one thing, unwarranted personal comments is another. They are disrespectful. Complimenting a smile is not. Huge difference. As for “verbal abuse,” this goes to both personal boundaries and


courtesy, rule of thumb, don’t make sexual comments to any woman in a public place, or in private without her permission. Verbal belittling, swearing, etc is unacceptable anywhere. If you are unsure of a woman’s boundaries, ask, she will respect you for it. I recall one of our male sf posters who altered his opinion of what constitutes abuse, spoke up, and earned the respect of many members, both male and female.
 
Sassycakes said:
I was just wondering if you think it's alright for a man to grope or have a young girl in a room with him while he is naked. If of course she had a very short skirt on and a tight blouse. Would that give him permission because she was dressed provocatively
Click to expand...

I was reading about the same type of setting in one of the cases. She was 16 and said she was o.k. with sex but her objection was that he invited another guy.

So it depends on the circumstances.

No guy should force himself under any circumstances.
 
Camper6 said:
Well thanks for that. In a female only society.

Anyway. All I'm trying to find out is at what stage I am no longer funny and become a pig.

I could never figure that out. One guy tells a joke and the girls all laugh. Another guy tells the same joke and he's a pig.
Click to expand...
Some people are seen as 'creepy' and no-one wants to encourage them by laughing at their blue jokes. And perhaps they aren't really funny or they have been told too often to raise a laugh any more.

If you don't want to be labelled a pig, tread softly and take in the vibes. Self reflection will guide you.
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top