Is it just me? "Miss" prefix before my first name makes me feel old.

In the places I've lived in the West, It's a derogatory term to call a lady of any age "Ma'am!"
I'm not alone in this. It really makes women irate! However, "Ms." is appropiate and doesn't enrage.
I address others by "Thank you dear." for men or women, hahaha! We have to be SO CAREFUL these days of our words!
Iā€™m probably the minority here but I also view it as a respectful thing. The reason I say that is that the actions of the people using these words including eye focuss and body language are nothing but considerate and respectful.

I can think of far more derogatory terms for old other than maā€™am
 

I don't live in Merrie "Olde" England. I'm American through and through, a certified mutt. Old is not a four letter word. Those who want to be bummed about it will be. The rest of us can embrace the good things that we have earned by living through it all.
 
I don't live in Merrie "Olde" England. I'm American through and through, a certified mutt. Old is not a four letter word. Those who want to be bummed about it will be. The rest of us can embrace the good things that we have earned by living through it all.
Sorry. Sometimes I go through my silly hour(s).
 
It's probably due to what approaches were customary in the areas where members were from.
Must be. I wasn't raised around any slaves or plantations so I don't know anything about it. I was taught to be respectful. Especially in food service. I guess if one of my customers wants to get ticked off when I say "Can I help you Ma'am?" that's gonna be their problem. I could find other things to call them. LOL!
 
The insufferable little college age people next door do that to me, and in a very dismissive sing song tone of voice. Decided I don't like the current crop of rental roomies there and will avoid them. šŸ˜³
 
I call it slave talk or plantation speak. The slaves used to use "Miss" or "Mister" with their first names to speak to or about the slave holders and their family members. It's disgusting that this ignorant, grammatically incorrect manner of addressing people is alive and well in 2020. It makes my blood boil when I am addressed in this manner. I never accept it. I always say that I am not a Miss. Please call me Mrs. or Ms. with my last name.

A lot of people get upset and I explain to them why they should not address people in that manner. Usually it's done to older women and sometimes older men. Also being called dear, deary, sweetie or honey is infuriating. Where I grew up people called each other by their names. I say that people who call you by these types names are bullies. Giving someone a nickname without having any relationship with them are pushy, disrespectful people. So they say that addressing a woman as Miss Mary is showing respect. I say it shows ignorance and complete disrespect.
A very dear online friend of mine in his fifties, former 82nd Airborne, African American, often calls me Miss Shalimar ( insert my real name.) It is a gesture of respect, nothing to do with my age. He has no idea how old I am. šŸ˜†
 
It is common in Texas and the South to address a lady as Ms. or as Mam and very common overseas to use Madam.

We were raised to be respectful and courteous.

But working International for megaoil corp, I can say for sure I have had interactions with women who were offended by being calling Ms. xxxx or the use of Mam or Madam

Glad I'm from Texas and Thank God for Them Texas Gals and Grits ( Girls Raised In The South ) ........

gamboolman.....
 
It is common in Texas and the South to address a lady as Ms. or as Mam and very common overseas to use Madam.

We were raised to be respectful and courteous.

But working International for megaoil corp, I can say for sure I have had interactions with women who were offended by being calling Ms. xxxx or the use of Mam or Madam

Glad I'm from Texas and Thank God for Them Texas Gals and Grits ( Girls Raised In The South ) ........

gamboolman.....
We try to be respectful too. Everyone round here gets called Miss Ms Ma'am whatever title is necessary based on whether we know em or not. It's considered rude to call a person by their first name without permission. Especially if we don't know em.
 
No.. you will never hear a adult man being called Master Joe.. or Master Gus.. Master is the male equivalent of Miss. Do you think using Miss First name for women is a way to diminutize them? It seems to be acceptable to treat women as children or as childlike.. particularly if they are elderly.
To me it feels diminutive not respectful.
 
Actually I want to smack someone I don't know if they call me "sweetie" " honey" or anything close to that.
At times Iā€™ll say something. DH will watch to see if my temper will flash if someone has done it repeatedly. Itā€™s not very often and Iā€™m not rude. Sweetie is a term for little kids and really old people, so darn well donā€™t call me that.

It always seems off when I hear (on tv) an adult man answering or talking with another man and saying ā€œyes, sirā€ repeatedly. Obviously Iā€™m not from the south.
 
Can't say I've ever heard of that practice before. :unsure: It does sound like something a child might use out of respect for an adult.

I was raised to not call an adult by their first name. I'm another one who had a lot of Aunts who weren't related to me as a kid. As an adult though, I was more or less invited to call them by their first name. And if I wasn't 'invited', I did anyway. :oops:

So I understand what you're saying, it would feel sort of wrong coming from one adult to another. I wonder if your name somehow 'goes' with the Miss. Some names roll off the tongue nicely with this practice - Miss Mary or Miss Daisy. Maybe someone liked the way your name sounded and started using it and then others in the group just sort of copied it, thinking you liked it too.

I like to use the Ms title now but most people just use my first name or call me Mrs anyway. I don't bother to correct them.

I was thinking I would rather like the 'Miss' way of being addressed but changed my mind when I tried it. Miss Leonie doesn't quite work somehow. :D
 
worked with special needs hs aged kids for past 7 years or so. students are encouraged t know teacher's/aides' names. some called me Miss K (first name) some Miss S (last name). had a student (one of my faves) who had a lot of difficulty verbalizing due to physical disability. every day i'd ask her "what's my name? and everyday she would just shrug. then one day, i was at one end of a hallway and she was at the other end and i clear hear her bellow ... "MISS K" at the top of her lungs. my last name is often mispronounced, so it made no difference if i was Ms Seagull, Ms seagirl, ms seabird.

hey, i'm an "old lady"... call me whatever you want as long as it's not profane!
 


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