Polyamory

You're reading my words correct.

I didn't say people should be prevented from living their lives in ways I don't agree with, I simply find the lifestyle disgusting being the old-fashioned traditionalist that I am.

Thank you for clarifying, I wasn't reading you properly. When I hear someone is 100% against something I take it to mean they want to prevent others from doing it.
 

Exactly!!!!!!! I'd love to hear from many who have been into polyamory or into polygamy for awhile if they have deep down fully honest satisfaction from that life style.
I can almost understand Polygamy..at least it is committed relationships with everyone aware of all others. It could also be nourturing for children.
LOL as I said before it might not be so bad to have several husbands...depending on one's mood, ya know 😉 When one ticks you off you turn to another.😃
 

A member here used to be in a polygamous relationship. Maybe this person will jump in and add their viewpoint and experience.
When I was single (divorced twice)and about 38 I got involved with a couple that was open to a threesome. We messed around once and it seemed to improve our relationship...though I turned down anymore offers. Soon after I met the person I am still with, a couple years into our relationship a female asked to do a threesome. We tried it and it was not very fun. It ended up very poorly with increased weird behavior from our friend, until she divorced and became a married lesbian, and I never responded to her again. That's it for me...about 30 years ago.
 
Polyamory is different than polygamy. At the age of 45, I entered into a polygamous marriage. We were together for more than 25 years until my husband died in 2018. Polygamy in Islam (at least in our case) is different from what I've read about polyamory. Although I loved my (future) husband very much, after much trepidation, a lot of reading up on the subject both from Islamic and secular sources and changing my mind several times, I finally married him. It was beneficial to me for many reasons. Initially I was so worried about what my family and friends would think but it became a non issue since everyone loved him and loved us as a couple.

People think of polygamy as a man "eating his cake and having it too" but in Islam it's not that simple. Such husbands have to please and support both their wives and treat them each fairly. Try doing that with menopausal women. :p Ironically I was a jealous person before and during part of the time we were married. Didn't help that my husband was gorgeous and had lots of sometimes brazen admirers. Islam allowed polygamy (did not invent or encourage it) for two main reasons. During the holy wars, many women and children lost their husbands/fathers. The men who were left took on more wives in order to support them and their children. Secondly, It is said that God ordered: "Choose 4 and divorce the rest". That was because back in biblical times, men had several wives and concubines. And trust me, my polygamous experience was nothing like what they show on Sister Wives. Another point about polygamy. The wives are given respect and are entitled to their husbands' properties unlike mistresses of a large percentage of married men in this country who have admitted to having affairs.

A couple of years ago, the first polyamory couple I read about was in their 20s and engaged. A news site did an article about the practice and featured them. She had another boyfriend and a girlfriend. He also had someone else but I can't remember if it was male or female. Both had the other partners with each other's consent. You mentioned polyamory participants as being in their 20s, 30s & 40s but lets not forget the "swingers" of our generation. Also Baby Boomer gay men participated in some hot orgies back in the day at The Baths and places like that. How do I know this? Some of them wound up being our patients in the STD clinic and told us all about the lifestyle.
 
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Dictionary definitions do not always convey on the whole from a societal or moral aspect. "Swinging", whether swapping partners or engaging in Orgies, is a form of polyamory/polygamy. Adultery is illegal in very few states and defective/desuetude as far as a criminal prosecution is concerned.

Lot's wife was turned into a pillar of salt, when it should have been pepper.
 
(((Keesha))) :love: I think maybe you're misunderstood because you think independently. So many people are narrow-mindedly conservative or liberal and are threatened by that. Thank you for your 'Keesha' insights and I look forward to reading them again after your break.
I wasn’t misunderstood. I misunderstood the topic.

The topic is polyamory which I know nothing about. My misunderstanding is thinking it was polygamy which I know little to nothing about.

Most of the information I know about it
(polygamy) comes from tv shows and articles written about it. Many cults seem to use polygamy to lure young girls into marriage and sexual relationships which I find interesting but appalling at the same time.

Polygamy is also practiced in certain religions. Girls are told at a young age that they will be married to someone they might not even like or respect yet have no choice in the matter. Then there are religions who make huge financial gains by selling off their daughters like cattle. Girls who run away are often hunted down and killed. Surprisingly fathers would rather lose their daughter than lose face with family and friends if the daughter opposes or fights back the planned arrangement.

I’m not into any of the above. In fact, I’m hugely opposed to it however it’s none of my business. Readying about these types of marriages I find very disheartening and disturbing. Then one day a member here wrote about what it was like to be born and raised into a religion who practiced polygamy and it wasn’t at all what I expected. Sex wasn’t a priority but it was expected. What I found most interesting was the trusting bond these women formed with one another. This woman said the emotional intimacy between the women is what gave them courage and strength. They learned to support and love each other instead of competing. It was a perspective I hadn’t considered due to my own judgments.

While trying to communicate my thoughts, I panicked which happens sometimes.
 
"Swinging", whether swapping partners or engaging in Orgies, is a form of polyamory/polygamy.

Many people who identify who identify as polyamorous will vigorously disagree with you. Most of the people I've met in the poly community avoid those in the swinging community because for them swinging is about the sex and polyamory is about the love. However there is some crossover and some people from the swinging community get involved with the polyamory community and start having polyamorous relationships because the find them deeper and more satisfying than swinging relationships.
 
Dictionary definitions do not always convey on the whole from a societal or moral aspect. "Swinging", whether swapping partners or engaging in Orgies, is a form of polyamory/polygamy.
https://www.healthline.com/health/relationships/polyamory-vs-polygamy#key-differences

Swingers ? How can you possibly say that women born Mormon or Muslim who have no say in how or who they marry, are swingers? Most are virgins who are forced to marry men who want multiple partners. These women don’t want multiple partners nor is it allowed. The only partner they are allowed to be with is their husband. How can you possibly classify this as swinging?

If you look up the meaning of swinging, this doesn’t even come close.

The above link clarifies the differences.
I see that OneEyedDiva shared her story. I wouldn’t consider her a promiscuous swinger.
 
Knowing some people in Polyamorous relaionships I see no harm in choices. And I think it is up to them,
My choice is the Pauline version of marriage. Hubby and I have never 'known' anyone else in the biblical sense and this exclusive relationship has sustained us through thick and thin for 58 years. We are co-equal partners and mutual support for each other.

Engaging in sexual adventures would not have added anything lasting to our lives but I do remember that as a young wife I often mused on the possibility of a second wife because I was a bit lonely and overwhelmed by marriage and children. What I really wanted was a good female friend.
 
What about same sex couples, does that make you sick?
Re: same sex couples, that's a big no-no in my world.

I do not accept or support such, nor do I believe same sex marriages should be allowed.

Vehemently against such, zero tolerance.

I'm old-fashioned to the bone and don't care how far the world or society has progressed.
 

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